Both of my roommates are at work, and the house is empty. This is kind of odd, because until the day before I left for Los Angeles to make dirty movies at the end of July, there were at least six people living here and the house was absolutely never empty. The novelty of being completely alone in my own home makes me want to fuck all over the house, especially since Jess and I had a conversation yesterday about how great the banisters in the first Webster St. house were for sex. They were exactly the perfect height, and thick and sturdy enough to support a good pounding. Our banisters in this house aren't really great, since we only have one that's horizontal and it had to be cut and screwed back together a la frankenstein's home improvement in order to slide furniture past, but I'm pretty sure the back yard could be a good time. The houses on either side of us are currently vacant, and I cleared all the garbage and plant matter out at the end of last week during my cleaning spree of doom. All of this brings me back to the problem at hand. "Hey I fucked on that" used to be one of our favorite games. The house is empty, so there is no one available for a full scale mission to have sex on unlikely objects. Maybe I should have slipped viagra into my eighteen year old boy-toy's coffee this morning before he left. He'd probably be in much more of a hurry to finish apartment hunting. I kind of wonder if I should let him and his prospective roommate know that apartment hunting works better at eight in the morning then eight at night, but I figure they'll learn it pretty fast on their own. I also kind of wonder if there's something odd about me considering slipping viagra into the coffee of a teenage boy whose sex drive more than meets expectations. As in, NO, six times a day is NOT enough.
On an un-related note, a really awesome artist named Colin Christian just let me know that he might be a sculpting me right now. He asked permission close to two years ago, and just the suggestion was an incredible honor, so I'm really excited. This is what some of his stuff looks like:
The pieces are really big, and soooo awesome. I posted the bunny because apparently I really like bunnies. Speaking of liking bunnies...
Please ignore the giant hickey (which is the reason Everhard is no longer allowed within 2 feet of my throat) and focus on the adorableness of tiny rabbits. Skibbles came from a sidewalk vendor in downtown LA and didn't make it back to Philadelphia, but he was really really cute and now I've learned not to get animals from places I wouldn't get food from.