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Aunt Gertrude's Blog


Aunt Gertrude

Aunt Gertrude

my boobs, politics and giant boxes of sex toys



yesterday morning i had an appointment with my doctor.  i have been attending them monthly since my spine surgery last september because i have had a rather slow and painful recovery process (plus the neurosurgeon didn't do his job correctly).  i also wanted to get some antibiotics for a little piercing accident i had three days ago.    
i am consider myself a very lucky woman.  not to sound egotistical or to brag but, i love my boobs.  they are a 36D/DD and are super nice, round and perky.  several of my friends have thought that i had an amazing boob job but, they're 100% natural. given i am 5'9" and super curvy they fit my body perfectly .   i'm sure that gravity will one day take effect , whether it's after my first baby or just with age and i will need to consult with a surgeon to counteract the gravitational pull. i also have both of my nipples pierced (i am a fan of piercings and tattoos and have my nose, tongue, nipples, belly and clit pierced as well as 5 tattoos; 2 of which were done by my close friend, the wonderful jackthezipper as a gift).

three days ago while curled up watching a movie, my clumsy ass knocked over a vitamin water onto my bed and while attempting to pull the comforter of my bed quickly so it would not  soak through onto my sheets and memory foam mattress pad, something snagged on the barbell in my left nipple and ripped more than  half of it out.  i have a super high pain tolerance but, even that as a little too much so, i called my husband and he came home to me in a bloody shirt sitting on a stripped down bed smoking a cigarette.

i am also very lucky because my blood clots freakishly fast and when i lifted up my shirt, it had stopped bleeding .  i cleaned it out and by the next morning it had already started healing.  i told my doctor that i wanted antibiotics as a precautionary measure.  i find it funny how doctors just have no clue about body piercings.  she asked if i had consulted my piercer about the wound but, having had piercings for the past 13 years of my life, i already knew the ins and outs of how to treat "piercing related injuries".  the fact that i went to med school and use to be a nurse didn't hurt either.

so, my left boob will live happily ever after.

i also have to make a statement about the vice presidential debates last night.  sarah palin is an idiot.  not answering half the questions asked and then stating that she doesn't agree with gay and lesbian couples having the same rights as heterosexual couples and how she will "tolerate' same sex couples but not approve of them made me sick.  a human being is a human being.  whether you fall in love with a man or a woman, you should be able to marry the person that you love, no questions asked and you should also have the same rights.  

i hope that everybody votes this election as it is the most important election of our lives.  

on a happier note, the concierge downstairs has a giant box of amazingness from adult dvd empire waiting for me !  unfortunately, i have to wait until the hubby gets home to carry it up since i'm not allowed to lift heavy  things. i ordered about 30 toys (half of which are pyrex) and several dvds including a boxed set of original irving klaw films that i have been looking for for quite some time!  i also want to thank cal exotics for the big box of goodies they so kindly gave me to use in my upcoming movies!  

xxxo
-ag




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