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On Fire by Penny Flame


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Penny Flame

Content! I Need More Content!!!



 

Down in San Diego right now, waiting for Christians tall self to show up so we can go for a run. I think he is going to play the part of my trainer for the site. He will help me to work out, and I will pay him in blowjobs. I think that is a fair trade.

Last night was pretty funny. Actually the whole day was funny, but most days that I spend with Buh Bleeze are funny.

(Christian just called and he is rolling out of bed, in LA, and heading down right now. Goddamn latey mclaterson)

Bleeze and I spoke yesterday of a website. Tucker Max's website actually,


 and I confessed my love for and of him, and Blee said "damnit I can do what this guy can do" and I laughed and said, "You better start writing motherfucker" and that's when he decided that he needs a website. Low and behold, PassDaBlunt.com was wide open, so he swooped on it, and is looking into designing and blah blah blah website lingo. He asks me "What do I do now?"

Me: Go out and get content.

Him: Content? Whats is content? (he pronounces each word with such clarity, hesitating briefly before attacking the next syllable. This is how he speaks when curious. If he could perk his ears up and cock his head to the side he would do that as well.)

Me: Content is us going out and being crazy in the name of our websites.

Him: License to do anything?

Me: license to do anything.

Him: Excellent (this is growled with purpose, his devious ulterior motives far more apparent than he would like to think).

So after a petite filet and the most delicious cheese selection available from the Vine, we head to Newport Aves best seedy bar, Pac Shores. Pac shores has velvet on the walls, is painted with mermaids and other aquatic life, so everything is swimming around you while you drown yourself in cheap shots of Hornitas. Which is exactly what we did. Shot after shot. This is the conversation between Bleeze and the bartender.

Bleeze: I need more content!

Bartender: What are you drinking?

Bleeze: CONTENT WOMAN! GIVE ME SOME FUCKING CONTENT!

Bartender: I KNOW YOU WANT MORE DRINKS, WHAT DO YOU WANT!

Bleeze: (turning to me) I think this little slut wants some of my content.

He then told everybody in the bar about his website, (which isn't up and or running yet), and about him needing to drink more for content. And then he went to the bathroom and intended on vomiting, and convinced himself it wouldn't make for good content if he were to throw up so he pulled a savage drunk maneuver and held it all down. Bleeze is going to make excellent content if he doesn't kill himself in the name of making content.

As we stood outside in the fresh cool ocean air, and I partook of "new bar best friend for the next ten minutes" Brians cigarettes, Brian tells us he just broke up with his girlfriend today, I high-five him and welcome him into the free world. Girlfriends suck. I've never even had one but I have friends who have and it makes my friends suck so by some transference property I can only assume the girlfriend is the one causing the great state of suckyness.

I make a sucky girlfriend. Even a sucky potential girlfriend. Sometimes even a shitty friend who happens to be a girl. And I'm not good at juggling men so I'm not a good player either. The other day I totally mistext Boss, sending him a text that was meant for B-Snapps, saying "I love you babe, I'm on my way home..." Totally awkward, B-Snapps asks me why I never text him back earlier, and convinced that I had, check the iphone, and definitely sent it to Boss. So I sent Boss a new text, owning up to my idiocy, my funny little mistext, and while I wait for a response from Boss, B-Snapps says to me, "Well babe, this will be the test, if he's cool and can laugh about it then he might be the one," to which I laughed and launched a conversation regarding the existence of "the one". One person? For ever? Come one....Its a nice thought but a little far fetched. Forever is a long time. People change so much. GaDing!

Boss: Haha, I thought that was a bit odd of a text

Me: How terribly funny, okay, I'm sorry, I promise I will never mistext you again. Glad we can laugh about this. B-Snapps is laughing at me too.

(yes, both men are aware of one another, nobody is committed here I just happen to believe that if you love someone you should tell them, and I hang out with tons of dudes. If not entirely dudes. I love a lot of men, and I think perhaps a lot of men love me. hahahah So there is no shame in telling someone you love that you love them. You never know when they might not be there to here your words.)

While I wait for his next response, I set my phone down right next to B-Snapps phone, and go to the potty. GaDing!

B-Snapps reads me Boss' response, while I sit on the toilet.

Boss: My tongue has been in your ass before, I think we're all good ;)

I spent the next thirty minutes laughing my ass off.  With the laid back attitude and honest response, I can't help but think: "Maybe he is "the one."

 


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