Savanna on Sex – Orgies, The Best Sex Ever and Taking too Long to Cum

My wife and I have been together about ten years now, and we're a modern couple.  She has a boyfriend and a girlfriend on the side, and I'm OK with that.  I have a girlfriend on the side, and she's OK with that too.  She also knows that I LOVE group sex.  She's OK with it, but she doesn't want to come to an orgy with me.  How can I convince her that orgies are normal sexual behavior?

-  Justin T.

Opiates, lots of opiates! No seriously though, with such an open relationship I would think that the lines of communication should be wide open. Still, the best time to share your desires, fantasies and requests is during pillow talk, during the heat of passion. If you share with her, that even though you love group sex it would be so much more meaningful for you if she were there with you she will look at it differently. You could ask her to come and just watch as a voyeur. Once you have her there she will most likely get so turned on that she will want to join in the fun. There is very little I wouldn't do for my man even when I wasn't comfortable with it but it's important for me to keep him happy and I wouldn't know if he didn't ask. Why don't you bring it up when you have something special coming up like a birthday or anniversary? A little give and take always works in a relationship so ask her if there is something she would like in return.

I don't know if you can convince her that orgies are normal sexual behavior but they are a celebration in ones sexuality and freedom to enjoy the pleasures of the flesh. They are an expression of sexual prowess and adventure and lust and to be so free and open to the experience is a gift that can be so beautiful.

 

Since you've had sex with so many different people I'm curious what was your best sexual experience. What made it the best? I figure I could learn something from the guy who rocked your world!

- AB

For me the sex gets better as I grow closer with someone. Don't get me wrong I've had some terribly delicious one night stands, but it is far better for me when it's on an emotional level and it just keeps getting better. It's so rare for me to connect emotionally as so many of my sexual encounters are for the camera that when I get stimulated by the body's biggest erogenous zone, the brain, it is so much more intense.

My best sexual encounter was waking up with someone in the spoon position. I felt his hard shaft poking at me and I pushed against him. When we turned and started making out we were so connected that every inch of my body was on fire. We were completely in sync with each other and it was incredible. I hope you can experience that connection with someone as it's the best ever.

 

It takes a long time for me to cum when I am having sex. Some women love this because I last so long, but my latest girlfriend seems to get frustrated at how long it takes.  I really like her, but when she seems frustrated it makes it even harder for me to cum. Any advice?

- Darius

Oh honey, I know what it's like when it becomes mental. As soon as someone wants me to hurry up and cum there is no way I can do it. I also know how frustrating it can be when I can't seem to make someone cum. There is nothing worse than having to say, "Honey can we stop?" Believe me I went through how many years of marriage saying that because he would never cum and I would start to get swollen and sore and dry after an orgasm or two. The only thing I can suggest is to take cumming out of the equation. Let it just happen. Once it's not about the final result and about the moment then an orgasm is sure to happen. Try to feel every inch of your member and be in the moment. And if that doesn't work, have her stick her finger up your ass! Kisses!

 

My husband enjoys dirty talk in the bedroom. Mostly this turns me on, but it seems like we can never have sex without some sort of fantasy scenario talk. The talk is almost always about having a threesome. Does this mean he wants to have sex with other women? Should I be worried?  I feel like he's looking for something I can't give him. What should I do?

 

My ex husband was just like that! He was always talking through the whole thing about some other girl or guy fucking me. Honestly it was kind of annoying as we were never on the same page. I'm happy to hear that it at least he "mostly" turns you on. So what if he really does want to live out his fantasy of having a threesome? I always suggest that the best time to bring up your fantasies is during the heat of the moment and then revisit it later by saying, "Remember when we talked about having a threesome while we were making love? Well, what do you think? Is that something you might want to try with me?" You said you're afraid he is looking for something you can't give him. 

Why don't you have a little conversation with him about your fears? Perhaps by opening the lines of communication when you're not in bed together will bring you closer together so you can be on the same page once you're back in the bedroom. But honey, I've got to tell you that I feel that that is the ultimate gift that someone can give her man. I know, it's scary and I know it's not easy to share your man but if you share your fears it's possible they will subside. Talk to him Lynn, most likely he just fantasizes about this and would never actually want to do it. Let me know what he says and if he does really want to do it because I have advice on how to handle it and the best way to go about doing it!