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Intelligent Talk About Adult DVDs

Bikini Clad Cum Sluts, Island Fever 4 HD, Best Damn Giveaway Contest Continues, and a whole lot more!


Intelligent Talk About Adult DVDs


Spotlight Title: Bikini Clad Cum Sluts: Special Extended Set

Jonni Darkko has been distributed by Evil Angel for years now and his biggest complaint to me when we discussed my reviews of his movies has been my demand for a lot of quantity; both in extras and in the movie itself. My reasoning has always been related to the comparison of his titles to those of his peers at the company; pointing out that when another director gives the consumer four hours of good stuff and some super extras, his shorter movies barren of anything significant pale by comparison. His market niche is slightly different too, going for the younger club going audience more than jaded old porn hounds, but unlike those that kiss ass in the industry, I firmly believe in the Nietzsche idea of pushing someone to make them better rather than let them rely on false praise. Since our last conversation, Jonni has indeed upped his game a lot too, culminating in Bikini Clad Cum Sluts: Special Extended Set; a three disc set that will shut many up about Jonni being the weakest director under the Evil Angel umbrella for a long time. The idea was to stay simple, merely have some hotties play by the pool in swimwear, oil up, and then go at the sex like they were possessed. If that sounds as good to you as it did to me, you will probably find this to be a superior effort too. This was one of his best DVD sets offered to date thanks to the wealth of solid extras, the great casting, the excellent work on the technical areas, and the appeal of the theme. The title alone made me laugh as though it would be a cheesy POS yet when I sat down to watch it; I found that Jonni knew exactly what he was doing. The inclusion of such superior elements was ultimately what made it easy for me to rate  Bikini Clad Cum Sluts: Special Extended Set as Highly Recommended, a couple of my friends pointing out that they'd have bumped it up a notch based on my bragging how good it was alone. In short, Jonni Darkko has certainly come a long way to providing some of the best movies available in the gonzo world, a far cry from the generic titles he provided when first learning the ropes so my hat is off to the man once again; Great job!


Xcritic Updates: An Eye on Excellence

The secret is now out that Xcritic is taking steps to provide you, the consumer, with everything you asked for and more. Leading this charge is our Best Damn Giveaway Contest  by Sex Z Pictures. The company is going to fly the grand prize winner and guest out to the porn convention in Las Vegas, stuff his pocket full of money, and even provide a dinner date with two of the most sought after hotties in porn! Runners up will get signed copies of the multi-disc Upload, sure to be a major player at awards time, and every major media outlet in the industry appears to have picked up on the contest already.



Then, we have a plethora of industry insiders joining our expanded forums to find out what YOU want in their movies, asking advice and offering up early looks at their upcoming titles. With brand new contract girls posting, exclusive content, and even key industry players starting to blog about their desire to give you more of what you ask for, it's clear that Xcritic has already addressed the most important market niche of all, that of the consumer all too many others in the marketplace dismiss with contempt. We're forging alliances and preparing for even more features you're going to love so keep checking back as we build upon the thousands of porn reviews you've found so helpful and continue our quest to deliver the goods.



Highlights of The Week 

With the high definition format wars in full bloom, the limited number of HD DVD and Blu-Ray porn titles has been minimal; the industry refusing to commit to full fledged production on either format until the dust settles a bit. Taking a cue from our mainstream sister site, DVD Talk, we are format neutral and are happy to report in detail on all the best titles in whatever format they are produced in. This week, we finally took the amount of time needed to give you a look at what has largely been hailed as the clearest, sharpest, and most value packed high definition porn title released since the advent of either format with our comprehensive look at Island Fever 4 HD DVD: The 1080p title showed the best picture of the year with a nod to the quality that went into the original shoot last year; the infamous "eye" of director Joone supplemented by the camera skills of Robby D., the editing wizardry of Nick P., and the most extensive use of the company's main contract stars; Jesse Jane, Teagan Presley, Jana Cova, and Sophia Santi, ever displayed on the small screen. Stepping ahead of the pack in other ways too, the decision by company President Samantha Lewis pulled out all stops by including all the major extras of the original release, updating the trailers to take advantage of the opportunity to showcase current and upcoming HD releases, but also upgrading the technical qualities of the extras for appreciative fans. The movie itself has won accolades all across the globe for a reason too: the treasure trove of erotic content of twenty scenes lasting over three hours should be enough to impress even the most jaded of you in search of a movie that can not only show off your home theater's but impress your ladies with the heated sex that doesn't rely on circus act tricks to warm things up. Essentially though, a new standard has been set as Digital Playground throws down the gauntlet to the competition with Island Fever 4 HD DVD.

This week, we also found something very offbeat to bring to you as a top pick, a movie called Spunk'd The Movie, that many of you will find even better than the mainstream television show that inspired it. Not The Bradys XXX has proven to be this year's best parody porn with a couple of other comedies offering up some fun too (Operation: Desert Stormy coming to mind as less of a parody but still well done). Comedy porn is rarely handled all that well for many reasons, typically relegated to the larger companies but I stumbled across something the other day that really caught my eye too. Newcomer director Justin Kane and 6969 Entertainment came out of nowhere with one of the better efforts of the year with  Spunk'd The Movie; the fuck flick parody basing itself on the television show Punk'd, where celebrities are the butt of elaborate hidden camera practical jokes at the hands of Ashton Kutcher. Owing as much nod to Allen Funt's Candid Camera,  Spunk'd The Movie goes well beyond the normal porn route to parody the show but also the celebrity wannabe's we see all over the news of late, the 2006 shoot skipping some easy targets but hitting others dead on with humor and heated sex that will turn many a head. Starring Nick Manning as Gashton Cootcher, the show closely mirrors the television show very well, leading to the situations best left for porn. It was a lot of fun and showed a solid balance between comedy and sex. The casting was inspired in most cases and while I'd like to have seen longer sex scenes (perhaps using branching technology), the action was quite strokable too so I rated it as Highly Recommended as much for the ambitious manner the director/writer tackled as the final outcome.

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The ladies then took a dominant role in Strap Attack 7: Special Edition: Joey Silvera and his work at Evil Angel are sometimes tough to pin down in terms of summing his work up easily. This is because unlike many of his peers, he experiments a lot and gives into his admittedly twisted muse more than they do. His latest work in my growing pile of porn is Strap Attack 7: Special Edition, the sequel to Strap Attack 6, where women took charge of the men; furthering their dominance by donning strap on dildos to penetrate the male puckers. The specific theme this time was addressed by the Give Mommy Your Ass!subtitle on the cover, a few of the ladies too young to pull off the MILF angle quite as well as the others. If you like femdom action though, Joey has been at this game of directing more than most so I knew the show would look better than the typically ultra low budget fuck flicks his competitors make. It might cater to a narrow sexual kink but there was enough twisted action that many of you will agree it should be rated as Recommended. The technical raw edges, the casting, and the lack of extras lowered the score somewhat but finding guys that will do this kind of thing that don't look like regular pole smokers is reportedly tough and to fit so much footage on a single disc requires sacrifices in the bitrate. Still, the appearance by some fan favorites sure didn't hurt and in many ways, Strap Attack 7: Special Edition was a better movie in terms of replayability and stroke value than Strap Attack 6 so give it a look if you like seeing the ladies in charge of things for a change (just don't pick up the soap if your gal pal watches it with you).

Next up, Don gave a look at Outkast: Jim Powers is probably the most consistently talented director for Sin City these days. His awards and industry accolades aside, he has the ability to provide extremely nasty sex in a variety of ways, not relying on a formula nearly as much as most of his peers. His latest movie making it to me is Outkast; a loosely scripted feature that had Tory Lane as a renegade skater on the means streets of the big city, inspiring a crime wave all her own. The back cover said it like this: "As the sun sets on the City of Angels, a new breed of outlaws has taken to the streets with an insatiable appetite for money and sex. Sin City presents the story of six gorgeous, and dangerous young women who rollerblade through the streets of L.A. and terrorize the whole town with their criminal and sexual escapades. From the back alley blowjobs to the mind bending DP orgies in that dark abandoned warehouse on the bad side of town, these nasty young nymphomaniacs put a whole new twist on gang banging." It had a lot of rough edges but fans of contemporary hardcore music will enjoy that this fuck flick provided something for you that few others do these days. It also had a cast of ladies that each could be said to have street credibility and the sex was typically heated, if not the best work of the cast. The extras were pretty good and added to the fun of the show so I felt a light Recommended was fair for many of you, albeit with some reservations. In short,  Outkastwas technically pretty good and worth your time, money, and seed if you like features with enough bite to them for musically oriented types and skaters alike.

We then bring you a gonzo title with a definite niche appeal for fans of medical scenarios in I've Been Sodomized 4: Mark Wood is such a prolific director these days that his output almost rivals my own with his movies at Red Light Districtand other companies. Given the state of affairs, it makes it incumbent on me to keep abreast of his work in many ways lest I let one of his better titles slip through the cracks. Given his recent past, I had high hopes for his latest effort, I've Been Sodomized 4, the series I last saw with I've Been Sodomized 2. The series is dedicated to anal sex with a number of hotties involved, the theme of a medical setting being the driving point. Given what was posted on the cover and the free movie tossed in, I was hopeful that Mark wouldn't let me down. It had a decent mix of newcomer gals and established professionals that handled the action nicely enough. The technical matters were crisp and reflected some care, with the additional movie in the package giving it some serious fuck for the buck value. Thanks as much to the replayability and stroke value though, I rated it as Recommended but many of you will think it is worth even more than that. In short,  I've Been Sodomized 4 should serve fans of anal action as much as those into medical fetish work so give it a look.

Sometimes, a title has a catchy name based on an altogether different project, this being the case with The Good The Bad and The Slutty 3: Juan Cuba and Platinum X Pictures has never really received the kind of accolades it has often deserved but as a guy that has watched him since he was one of the company's leading BTS directors and gofers, I know how far he has come. Many of his latest works compete with those of Mark Wood for title of the best directed material they have had in years, Juan's latest title being The Good, The Bad, and The Slutty 3, the sequel to The Good, The Bad, and The Slutty #1 that I reviewed awhile back. The sex here really fell into no particular niche, merely showing three longer than average scenes of decadent fun, culminating in an orgy. I know that doesn't give you much to go on but the marketing of the title left something to be desired too given that there was little on the cover to suggest anything out of the ordinary. It was good enough to merit a rating of Recommended based on the quality of the cast, the heat of the sex, and the solid technical values. The extras were on the light side and the movie was shorter than most gonzo efforts of late but quality over quantity is a truism that we should all keep in mind. In short, The Good, The Bad, and The Slutty 3 had some decent value, strokability, and replay value so you might want to give it a look.

Lovely reviewer Ravyn then found two titles for fans to appreciate with Flawless: a tale about a girl and her diamond and how envy is the root of all evil. It   seems to  be  more like a spoof of an every day  talk show and a  real life  photo shoot, everyone is after  Tera and the  huge  rock on her  finger. Filled with laughs and the funniest talk show host, Flawless is a comedy with a touch of sex to add into the mix. I found myself laughing and enjoying the antics that were going on. I think every couple would enjoy Flawless. The   sex is very passionate and you don't have the ladies watching the clock. Spyder's  scene with Tera at the  end  showed a  very  passionate  and  endearing  side to him which you don't  see much in  male  performers which I liked watching. Something more performers should try doing. I got a kick out of the talk show host and I think everyone will. If you are looking for something to watch with your spouse, partner or girlfriend, this is a must watch and a must Recommend! She then found merit in Taboo Pain: Andrea Di Angelo  has  gotten in touch  with the  inner  workings of  his  mind to find  what makes  for a   good  fetish  title. Bypassing  all the other  directors  at  LFP, he  has  continued in his goal to make the  perfect  fetish title that  caters to every possible  fetish known to man. With a cast of what in his eyes are truly exotic looking woman and men that can bring their own sense of style. Adding to themix chemistry with their co-stars for one very hot scene. In his own words Director Di Angelo states that "this is his best Taboo yet ". Fortunately for him, proving him wrong is going to be   interesting to say the least. I liked the settings he used in the opening scene, but Marco could have worn something that would have brought out the dungeon theme more. The choice of music for the second  and  third scene was  the difference  between night and day.  I enjoyed the fact that you covered al the bases with foot play, spanking and the bondage. Overall very nice work. LFP needs to give you fresh story lines to work with and more toys to play with before it starts to become boring and you loose those fetish lovers that are always looking for something new. As I said before... For those that enjoy fetishes of any form   Taboo: Pain is one that I can Recommend and  hope you will  enjoy!

Reviewer Alexander then provided us with an in depth look at a couple titles you might find interesting with I Love Asians 4: New Sensations digs into their vaults to highlight 10 of their hottest Asian-centric scenes.  The segments on this 2-disc "collector's edition" DVD span five year's worth of action, from 1992's Naughty College Schoolgirls 27 to late-2006's Super Naturals #4. Already familiar with the girls featured here, I knew, at the very least, the women would be smokin' hot.  However, having not seen many of the titles these scenes are ripped from, I had no idea if I was going to be treated to three hours of erection inducing action, or a series of boner killing duds.  Despite its failures (namely, a disappointing lack of extras and an old scene of Kaylani), you cannot go wrong with a DVD that features nearly four hours of consistently good sex, 10 scenes from 10 of New Sensations' best releases, 10 incredibly hot Asians, and some of the industry's top male performers. Although there's not an extra to speak of here, and some misleading box art, it's a solid, lengthy, and consistent enough compilation to merit a recommendation from me. He then saw fit to explore the excitement of I Cum For You, U Cum For Me #2: Best. Title. Ever.  (I mean, really, it's both straight to the point (she's telling us that she'll cum, and so will you!), and strangely poetic.  (OK, while it may not be the best ever, it's way more creative than Big Boobs Are Cool!, I've Been Sodomized, and Swallow My Children.) Anyway, I knew exactly what I was going to get here: a half dozen beauties masturbating with an assortment of big synthetic dongs before treating director Mario Rossi to wet, sloppy blowjobs.  It's an impossible-to-fuck-up formula provided the girls are hot and energetic enough, so my hopes were high for  I Cum For You, U Cum For Me 2. Despite the just-OK final scene, the first two hours on this DVD are fantastic. The bulk of the girls are hot, they make fine use of the toy collection, and all of the POV blow jobs are appropriately wet, sloppy, and sexy. Plus, Paulina James, whom I was unfamiliar with before watching I Cum For You, U Cum For Me #2, just rocketed to the top of my hottest adult stars list.

One of our favorite reviewers, The Mooninite, then spoke up with a couple of heated selections of his own with Big Boobs Are Cool!: Few of us would argue that and those who might contest that would do well to check out this latest release from Burning Angel, featuring some of the best busty beauties to star alongside the reigning queen of alt-porn. No plot, just tits. All in all, this is a pretty solid effort from Burning Angel. The girls are all natural and if they don't look fake-perfect like a lot of porn stars do, that's okay. The performers all seem to be enjoying one another and themselves and the sex is passionate, hot, and very enthusiastic, never seeming forced or phony. The camera work and production values are fairly typical gonzo quality but there's a decent sense of humor behind the whole production that definitely works in its favor. Burning Angel wants us to know that  Big Boobs Are Cool and brother, they ain't lyin. Tit fans unite, this disc does it right. Even if the extras aren't all that, the feature is pretty hot stuff and if jugs are your thing, this oughta get you off. He then found a nice little tribute to the art of semen shakes with Swallow My Children: Is there a man alive who doesn't enjoy a good blowjob from time to time? Probably, but they've got to be the exception and not the rule. For as long as people have been having sex, men have enjoyed blowjobs - there's plenty of historical evidence to back this up, trust me - and it's that fact that Rob Rotten and his motley crew of tattooed titty girls have decide to cash in on this time around. Swallow My Childrenhas no story, no plot, and no recurring characters, it's simply fifteen different girls giving a bunch of dudes head for two hours. Blowjob enthusiasts are going to enjoy this one no matter what but even those out there who have only a passing interest in oral compilations should find something to dig here. The sex is hot even if the range is limited and the girls are all quite attractive. The added bonus of the second feature gives the release a bit more bang for the buck and Swallow My Children comes recommended.

One of our up and coming (and I do mean coming) reviewers has been Felix Vasquez Jr and he suggested a few top titles as well, starting with MILF Lessons 13: Director J.R. has no flair for camera work, but he sure knows how to set up expectations when it comes to the opening menu and the presentation of this compilation. The segments are five detached little twenty minute intervals featuring an interesting set up and the inevitable hot Milf loving that proceeds with surprising steam, and the viewer is allowed to pick a segment based on the actress, and can also decide which section to begin with, including sucking, fucking, and cum shot. The sound is bad, the picture is choppy, and the extras absolutely suck, but there are some absolutely beautiful Milfs here who engage in sexy, humorous and goofy segments with a lot of entertainment value for the audience. He then presented a title he liked even better with Dripping Wet: It's often like watching an eighties music video on the Playboy channel, and that's a compliment. There's the booming score, the slow motion and the great shots of dripping wet women, and dripping wet bodies with intent stares. Even if "Dripping Wet" may be a bit too artistic to draw in all male audiences, the production is utterly top notch, and I found myself looking beyond the sex for once. I've seen that from Hustler, and they're great with making a spectacle out of porn. Steel's direction is a pure highlight to this artsy take on the porno, somewhat defying the pigeon hole and somewhat having me considering calling it erotica, in the end. The women are absolutely stunning, the direction is immaculate, and the set pieces add so much to a potentially drab affair. I hardly ever expect big things from pornography, but Steel and Hustler have changed my way of thinking by altering the doldrums of average porn films.

We then turned to see that reviewer Addison DeLick found a title of high caliber in Dick Hunters: a nice little twist on "reality" porn: Instead of fearless guys approaching girls on the street and getting them to have sex, it's the ladies here who step out and go after the "innocent" boys (i.e. actors). Of course, the guys put up about as much resistance as a leaf in a typhoon, but it's a worthwhile fantasy nonetheless. Star and putative director Trina Michaels introduces the action by telling us she and her female porn colleagues are tired of humping the same old guys. So, alone or with another sex-industry hottie, Trina hits the streets in five well-conceived and energetically executed sequences, each containing lengthy, tension-building seduction chats. Besides the impressive length of the feature and the quality of the players, the DVD has strong extras. But it also sports a pet peeve of mine: opening credits that reveal all the girls in hard-core tidbits before we've even gotten to know them with clothes on. Do as I do and go to the scene index to start the movie. Featuring a neat "reality" porn premise of aggressive women hitting on unsuspecting men, some  refreshingly full-figured girls and intensely hot sex, Dick Hunters has everything it takes to make for a new franchise. Host/performer/director Trina Michaels has an All-American cheerfulness that's hard not to love, and she and the other beauties here are talented fellatrixes in a movie with more than the usual complement of cocksucking. The movie looks good, the extras and the trailers are potent, and at two hours-plus, there's a lot to ponder. For maximum enjoyment and buildup of sexual excitement, first watch the behind-the-scenes segment and get to know the girls before you watch them get down and dirty.

We end our weekly round up of semen swallowing sexiness withSaul Good's inquiry into Deepthroat Virgins 24:  Homegrown Select is pure amateur action. Here, in Deepthroat 24, the action involves 4 young ladies that need their tonsils checked. The girls are cute in their amateurish way, reminding you of the gal you saw at the Safeway last night. Little did you know the ice cream she was buying was to soothe her raw throat. With only 4 scenes, Homegrown Select is taking a chance with quality over quantity. Can a lowly, amateur label pull that off? I hope. Homegrown's Deepthroat Virgins # 24 is actually quite good. I dig the amateur work, so I can distance myself from the cheap production and lack of music. Here it's about the girl on the bus and how naughty she can be. After watching this series, you'll start questioning everyone you pass; deepthroater or no deepthroat? A flick like this surprises you because the girls are so natural that you really start to think you might see someone you know. While most of the action is hesitating deep throats and mediocre oral, the fun here is in the amateur 'innocence'. The final scene, Amber's, is the only that features true, unrelenting deep throating. The rest just dabble with it. I'm giving this disc a decent rating not because of the action, but because of the amateur gals and the efforts they put out. A few decent extras help, especially the blooper reel which is 12 minutes of some of the funniest shit I've seen.



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We'd love to read your comments and feedback on this column, Send us your thoughts on other things you'd like to see in the space, or even random thoughts about the world of porn. Drop us a line at [email protected].

The major contributors to The Blue Room this week were: Don Houston and Chris Thorne.


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