Eva Longoria's BF does not know what to do to her sexually in the sack [Archive]

Aphex Twin

03-22-2006, 02:52 PM

DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES star EVA LONGORIA had to teach her basketball beau TONY PARKER, how to please her in the bedroom, because he is so inexperienced. The 31-year-old actress has described their initial meeting as "lust at first sight", but admits she had to lead the way for her 23-year-old French boyfriend in the bedroom. She explains, "Tony's only been with one other person in his life. I'm the experienced one. "I'm the teacher, especially about love." Longoria, who is divorced from actor TYLER CHRISTOPHER and was romantically linked with 'N SYNC star JC CHASEZ, says the couple have no immediate wedding plans. The couple also has a difference of opinion when it comes to having children out of wedlock. Longoria says, "I would. Tony wouldn't. But we know exactly what we want in our future. Our children will speak French."

http://www.contactmusic.com/new/xmlfeed.nsf/mndwebpages/longoria%20is%20sexual%20teacher%20for%20parker_18 _03_2006

digitalfreaknyc

03-22-2006, 03:07 PM

I'd be pretty pissed if the person I was in a relationship with was spreading shit like that to the public.

PopcornTreeCt

03-22-2006, 03:07 PM

You don't know who Tony Parker is? You had to put "Eva Longoria's BF?" He was famous before she was.

SoSpacey

03-22-2006, 03:08 PM

"I'm the teacher, especially about love."

um. i am the student. and i have been a bad bad boy.

chino77

03-22-2006, 03:12 PM

I'd be pretty pissed if the person I was in a relationship with was spreading shit like that to the public.

if it was eva i think i would let it slide.

heimerSWT

03-22-2006, 03:12 PM

You don't know who Tony Parker is? You had to put "Eva Longoria's BF?" He was famous before she was.
He's a laker fan.

digitalfreaknyc

03-22-2006, 03:12 PM

You don't know who Tony Parker is? You had to put "Eva Longoria's BF?" He was famous before she was.

Sorry. I have NO idea who he is but I know OF her.

Bushdog

03-22-2006, 03:14 PM

I'd be pretty pissed if the person I was in a relationship with was spreading shit like that to the public.Agreed, it is pretty fucking lame. I hope he's playing her. Uhm yeah honey, you're the 2nd woman I've ever been with. :lol:

Aphex Twin

03-22-2006, 03:15 PM

You don't know who Tony Parker is? You had to put "Eva Longoria's BF?" He was famous before she was.

I do, but this isn't the sports forum, I can't assume that most people here would know who he is.

Morf

03-22-2006, 03:17 PM

You don't know who Tony Parker is?

*raises hand*

I don't.

Lateralus

03-22-2006, 03:25 PM

Until they started dating I didn't know either of them.

digitalfreaknyc

03-22-2006, 03:33 PM

Agreed, it is pretty fucking lame. I hope he's playing her. Uhm yeah honey, you're the 2nd woman I've ever been with. :lol:

Seriously.

I understand that celebrities do stuff to get attention but come on, this is a new low. Why would you bother talking about your sex life to the tabloids? Or maybe she's looking for an "out" in the relationship. ;)

And you know what they say about people who are pompous like this.

Bushdog

03-22-2006, 03:47 PM

*raises hand*

I don't.
You've had THAT much beer yet no basketball watchingto go along with it? -ohbfrank-

Rockmjd23

03-22-2006, 03:47 PM

An NBA basketball player only been with 2 people? :lol: He's no A.C. Green.

darkside

03-22-2006, 03:48 PM

A French Guy that doesn't know how to have sex. Right. Nice way to play her Tony.

I couldn't care less about them as a couple as long as Yoko doesn't screw with his head and ruin him as a basketball player.

adamblast

03-22-2006, 04:17 PM

Don't know who this baseball dude is, but JC Chasez is too pretty to have ever slept with a female. :D

digitalfreaknyc

03-22-2006, 04:18 PM

Don't know who this baseball dude is, but JC Chasez is too pretty to have ever slept with a female. :D

From what I've heard...that's a VERY accurate statement.

Or was it that his penis is so small that he WAS a female. I'm not sure which.

Lance is still the gay one though :)

Red Dog

03-22-2006, 05:30 PM

I had never heard of Tony Parker until I learned he was Eva's boyfriend. :shrug:

Buford T Pusser

03-22-2006, 05:57 PM

I had never heard of Tony Parker until I learned he was Eva's boyfriend. :shrug:

strong agreement.

mikehunt

03-22-2006, 06:09 PM

I don't know or care how either of those fucktard attention whore "celebs" are

Derrich

03-22-2006, 07:45 PM

I slept with Eva Longoria. And to be honest, it's not very enjoyable when your parnter isn't, you know, clean back there. I'm not being judgemental, but at some point it stops being a hygene problem and turns into a health issue.

Let's see how she feels about that being printed.
D

DVD Polizei

03-22-2006, 07:46 PM

He's just playing dumb. Smart man. :up:

crazyronin

03-22-2006, 09:16 PM

And now this... (http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20060322/ap_on_en_tv/people_longoria;_ylt=AqIh4t868nVMD2Qbo1k.G.ys0NUE; _ylu=X3oDMTA3b2NibDltBHNlYwM3MTY-)

So now in the bedroom, he's the teacher, but he's only slept with 2 women.:wtf:

Their fun time must really be teh suck.

Or somebody got a spanking when she got home ;)

melbatoast

03-22-2006, 09:37 PM

He's a laker fan.

Even us Laker fans know who Tony Parker is. :whofart:

Fincher Fan

03-22-2006, 09:55 PM

I didn't get the impression from any of her quotes that she was referring to sex. Looks like the journalist was sensationalising the story.

Joe Molotov

03-22-2006, 10:19 PM

I didn't get the impression from any of her quotes that she was referring to sex. Looks like the journalist was sensationalising the story.

That's true. The full quote read:

"Tony's only been with one other person in his life. I'm the experienced one. I'm the teacher, especially about love. And the one thing I really love is chess."

"Rook to B7" she added.

movielib

03-22-2006, 10:28 PM

Even us Laker fans know who Tony Parker is. :whofart:
Especially us Laker fans. He's done plenty of damage to our team.

melbatoast

03-22-2006, 11:09 PM

Especially us Laker fans. He's done plenty of damage to our team.

But apparenty not enough to Eva!

Buford T Pusser

03-22-2006, 11:37 PM

drum roll please?

raven56706

03-23-2006, 06:13 AM

Eva needs a good spanking......;)

antennaball

03-23-2006, 06:25 AM

I have yet to see the fascination with Eva Longoria...is it just that those of us here in Texas see attractive Hispanic women every day and people in other parts of the state still consider her look "exotic"?

She's cute, but I could find 10 cuter than her in 10 minutes on the Riverwalk.

raven56706

03-23-2006, 06:27 AM

i can see 10 cuter girls as well.... but this cute girl has money :drool: and cute

cdollaz

03-23-2006, 07:42 AM

I'm getting sick of Eva Longoria. With this interview, her pulling the "do you know who I am" card when getting stopped by the cops, and not showing up for an appearance for a bunch of kids during the recent all-star game, I wish she would just go away. She's not that good looking anyway.

Y2K Falcon

03-23-2006, 07:49 AM

I go with this being a story planted BY Tony Parker, just to remind us that he's banging Eva Longoria. :grunt:

The Bus

03-23-2006, 07:50 AM

Who the hell is Tony Parker anyway?

Y2K Falcon

03-23-2006, 07:54 AM

Who the hell is Tony Parker anyway?
Look at the title. He's some frog who's "Eva Longoria's BF". -rolleyes-

NCMojo

03-23-2006, 07:57 AM

Who the hell is Tony Parker anyway?
Just to help out The Bus, and anyone else who may be confused as to the identity of this Hollywood couple...

Eva Longoria:

http://us.movies1.yimg.com/movies.yahoo.com/images/he/photo/movie_pix/movieline/young_hollywood_2005_photos/eva_longoria/hollywood05v.jpg

http://cdn-channels.netscape.com/gallery/i/l/longoria/EvaLongori_Barso_5001945_Max.jpg

http://news.bbc.co.uk/media/images/41144000/jpg/_41144757_cannes_longoria_pa.jpg

Tony Parker:

http://www.mistilynn.com/tp-167i.jpg

digitalfreaknyc

03-23-2006, 07:59 AM

uhh...no. i need a bigger pic of him. i don't care about her.

NCMojo

03-23-2006, 08:08 AM

uhh...no. i need a bigger pic of him. i don't care about her.
Sigh... okay, I'll see what I can do. How about this?

http://www.nba.com/media/parker_40_051027.jpg

Just to clarify -- Eva Longoria is his girlfriend:

http://512mb.net/images/uploads/long581280x960.jpg

I hope that clears things up.

digitalfreaknyc

03-23-2006, 08:25 AM

Again...not caring about her. Show me a pic with tits up and out and I'm still not going to care.

however, show me a picture of him in his tank top and I may be :drool:ing

NCMojo

03-23-2006, 08:30 AM

Hey, I got you a picture of him wearing one of those little gay French berets! That should be worth something! :mad:

digitalfreaknyc

03-23-2006, 08:52 AM

Hey, I got you a picture of him wearing one of those little gay French berets! That should be worth something! :mad:

Sorry honey. Don't know what "gay french beret" you're talking about but I've never met a gay who would wear one. Wrong adjective.

NCMojo

03-23-2006, 09:13 AM

Sorry honey. Don't know what "gay french beret" you're talking about but I've never met a gay who would wear one. Wrong adjective.
Oh yeah?

http://catcode.com/minipics/sf96-20.jpg

EDIT TO ADD: I used the word "gay" as an ancillary to the words "little" and "French". No offense meant.