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Hard as Diamonds/Smooth as Satin

Studio: Hustler Video » Review by Staff Review » Review Date: 5/30/04

XCritic's Advice: Recommended

Hustler Confidential Presents Hard As Diamonds and Smooth as Satin Double Feature

Genre: Feature

The Movie

Since this a 2-DVD set, I'll break this review down into two. First up is Hard As Diamonds. This movie runs a little bit over 1.5 hours. Both features are written and directed by Frank Thring.

Scene 1 – Alicia Rhodes and James Brossman
First scene finds a lovely couple caressing each other nude in a stand up shower. After some petting, our lady begins giving the lucky chap a blowjob. Alicia is a pretty nice looking blonde chick that knows her way around a cock. After the blow job, he starts fucking her in a standing rear position. It's tough to see much, because from the viewer's vantage point we just see her tits smeared against the glass of the shower. This doesn't last to long as the camera angles then start getting better. He fucks her vaginally for a while before slipping it in her ass reverse cowgirl. Again all of this action is taking place in a shower and that makes for some odd camera angles. There is some anal action via reverse cowgirl. This doesn't last too long before he unloads on her face.
Scene 2 – Daphne, Alissa and Lee Hershaw
The two would be diamond thieves (Darren and Steve), lose the diamond bag they're carrying on a train. Dejected they have to call the ring leader of their crew, Lee Hershaw to tell him what's going on. Their phone call interrupts him in the process of hooking up with two gorgeous babes. This scene is filmed outside and the colors are awesome. Anyway, back to the sex. He's treated to a double BJ before he starts hitting the black-haired girl while the blonde plays with herself. He pulls it out to let the blond suck off the other girl's juices, before switching for some mish with the blond. Good angle of her licking the other girl while he's hammering away. He starts in on the black hair girls butt doggy, we get ATM with the other girl – very nice. Repeated ATM before he switches butts. He's hitting the blond girl anal reverse cowgirl, while the black-haired girl does some ATM. This one ends with a double facial.
Scene 3 – Wanda, Maria, Darren, Steve and Lee
Our three resident diamond thieves are sent to recover the package they lost before the prior scene. Told by the big boss (played by Frank Thring) to take some "bitches" and look like tourist, they enlist the help of two lovely ladies. These being a porno, the ladies of course have to have sex with the three before the journey begins. This scene has everything, DP, Oral, Vaginal, Anal, ATM and of course facials – I won't go into details. It's a good scene, with a lot of action going on – think about 3 guys and 2 girls and you can pretty much imagine what they're doing.
Scene 4 – Maria and Wanda

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Since the two girls from the prior scene are essentially props, they are not allowed to go out with guys while they hunt for the diamonds. Instead they decide to get naked and do each other. This girl/girl scene is filled with all sorts of carpet munching in various positions. Back in the hotel room two of the guys accost a voluptuous blond and want to know what happened with the case of diamonds. Cut back to the babes eating each other out. More action, this time with a dildo. Back in the hotel our thieves decide to kill the intruders – high drama. This one soon ends with the girls moaning away.
Scene 5 – All of the actors They found the diamonds, everyone is happy, so it's time to party! The couple they were going to kill earlier is now tied up to chairs and they're forced to watch everyone have fun. This scene has multiple guys and girls – perfect for a nice final orgy scene. Orgy ensues (while the captives are forced watch). Being the nice people they are, they decide to untie them and let them enjoy some sex too! This one again has it all – Oral, Girl/Girl, Anal, DP and plenty of gooey facials. My only complaint with this scene is that most of the camera angles are so close that you can't tell who is doing who.

After a popcorn break, we now pop open Smooth As Satin, this movie clocks in around 1 hour and 22 minutes and is filmed in South Africa. It also features many of the same actors from Hard as Diamonds.

Scene 1 – Alissa, Kelli and Nick Lang
First scene features Nick Lang looking for dancers. Enter two attractive young girls who are told to dance by Nick. The girls auditioning (Alissa and Kelli), are pretty nice looking. Sent away because they are not "raunchy" enough, the girls decide to find out from Nick what they need to do get the job. and show him that they can get with the program. They decide to give him a double blowjob and he then commences to fucking them both. There is some good action in this threesome scene, including anal and a lot of ATM. Both girls take it up the ass and taste each others ass before he unloads some cum on their faces. Good scene.
Scene 2 – Tiffany Diamond, Steve and Darren
Now all together, the traveling dance team all introduce the new members to the team. The girls all want to take in the sight seeing of South Africa, except for Tiffany Diamond. She wants to take in Steve and Darren, whom she notices on the beach. This girl is the worst line actress I've ever heard, but this is a porno. The girls leave her with Steve and Darren and she starts out sucking their cocks and getting her pussy licked. She gets fucked vaginally and anally by both guys. They both bust on her face and then pull a knife on her a rob her! The other girls return and find Tiffany tied up. The girls then devise a plan…
Scene 3 – Alissa, Kelli, Frank and Samantha
Deciding to become high priced call girls, the girls meet with Samantha (head woman in charge). Alissa and Kelli go along on a job where the client (director Frank Thring), likes to watch girls lick each other. The girls lick each others pussies by the pool, while Samantha gives Frank a blowjob. The girls end up using a vibrator on themselves, and Samantha fucks Frank before he cums in her face. Be warned, Frank is an older guy – not your typical porn stud. This scene is outside and very bright and well done.
Scene 4 – Tiffany Diamond, Alicia, Daphne and James
James is a john that likes to have three women at a time. Tiffany, Alicia and Daphne take turns sucking his dick while he plays with their pussies. James gets right down to business and starts fucking the girls in their asses. This scene features a lot of ATM and James even gets his salad tossed while he's fucking one the girls in the ass. He never fucks any of the girls vaginally – this scene is all anal and ass to mouth. He ends up cuming on one girls face and the swap cum with one another – warm scene.
Scene 5 – Alicia, Wanda, Samantha, Tiffany, Daphne, Lee, Steve and Darren
The girls – now with a little money, decide to find Steve and Darren and get their money back. Little do they know that Steve and Darren are busy sucking Wanda's tits in their hotel room. The girls burst in their room and tie Steve and Darren up (with bodyguard Lee's help). Soon the guys agree to give back the stolen goods and everyone ends up having an orgy (seriously). This scene has a little of everything – girl/girl, DP and cum shots galore. Great ending.

Audio/Video: Pretty much in line with the quality of the movie. Very good camera angles and no music problems. Good AV. Some of the camera angles are to close, but that's not a hug problem. The outdoor scenes are done extremely well and are very scenic.

The Extras (Identical on both discs):
Cast List
Previews – Hardcore previews of Anal Intensive 4, Hustler XXX 14, Mr. Beaver 14 and others.
Directors Profile – Almost 9 minute interview feature of Frank Thring.
Slide Show
Behind the Scenes – 11 minutes of behind the scenes footage. This makes you understand how much goes into making one of these flicks. Being able to fuck on command seems harder than one would think. Behind the scenes features some hardcore action.

Final Thoughts: Both of these films are pretty good features, although they have nothing to do with each other plot-wise. I would have to say that Hard as Diamonds is a tad bit better than Smooth as Satin, but both are recommended. The direction was very good, the camera angles were very good and the girls were extremely hot. Almost every scene had some anal action, and there was variety throughout the double feature.

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