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Can You Be A Pornstar? Episodes 5&6

Studio: Hustler Video » Review by Don Houston » Review Date: 2/18/05

XCritic's Advice: Watch On Demand

Can You Be A Porn Star? Volume 5 & 6

Hustler Video

Genre: Gonzo, Reality Television

Director: Faye Kneighm

Cast: Camille, Ivy, Lillian, Dusty, Sabrina Snow, Jassie, Corina Taylor, Jacqueline Feline, uncredited men
Non-sex roles by: Tabitha Stevens, Mary Carey, Dr. Ava Cadell, Ginger Lynn, Amber Lynn, John Steven, Henri Pachard, Terri Weigel

Length: 164.5 minutes

Dates of Production: 10/23/2003 (box), 11/1/2003 (credits)

Extra's: The extras were the same thing as last time with the best being two sex challenges where the gals formed two human pyramids (each episode had one) without any clothes on. If they had all gotten into a big orgy or something, I'd have been a lot happier but somehow, somewhere, the producers of the show seem to have dropped the ball and tamed down even the DVD extras. There was also a set of trailers and some spam but if you think those qualify as value added extras, you've been out to sea too long.

Condoms: None

Audio/Video Quality: Can You Be A Porn Star was presented in the usual 1.33:1 ratio full frame color as it was shot for pay per view cable television. The lighting on some of the show was lower than average and that caused some grain with video noise. The DVD mastering was fair, perhaps as good as the previous edition I reviewed in most ways but here were still compression artifacts where pixelation occurred and distracted from the show. Overall, it wasn't bad but I expect only the best from Hustler these days and with this being shot as a pay per view show; I can only imagine what consumers thought of it when it aired. The audio was presented in the usual stereo English but while Tabitha or Mary blared on, the so called contestants were not as clear, much like the earlier volumes. The audio wasn't as varied as the picture but again, with such a show being viewed by so many people on cable, I'd have thought no expense would be spared in order to get more loyal fans checking out the show (and other movies made by Hustler).

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Body of Review: Reality television seems to rule the airwaves these days with everything from singing contests to survival contests to supposed "real life" in a house full of strangers being the norm in terms of the genre these days. From those who clamor to hear Donald Trump tell someone the magic words "You're Fired" to Simon telling some poor sap how talentless they are (like that hack would know); a large number of people appear to be hooked on this type of entertainment. Is it any wonder that the porn world would follow suit and provide a similar experience to the masses, regardless of the believability of the show (it's my opinion that people who watch reality television also think professional wrestling is real, the check's in the mail, and that their significant other will only "put it in a little bit" as well as stop when it hurts you). The first such show in this new breed of porn was Porn Star Idol by Platinum X Pictures where a host of porn star judges would rate candidates as they passed various tests to see if they had what it took to be a porn star. In a likeminded vein, Hustler has started a new series, Can You Be A Porn Star?, with various contestants all competing against one another in order to get a contract with a major porn company and $100,000 cash. My first exposure to the show was during the 2004 AEE Show where a host of cutely attired babes wore outfits with the series title on it, handing out free cool stuff (they were at a couple of shows in Las Vegas from what one of them told me). I didn't think much of it because at the time, I didn't have cable and really wasn't interested in reality television. I missed the first volume of the series, but was able to review Episodes 3 & 4, both on the same DVD by Hustler. I enjoyed it to an extent but thought the concept was limited for true fans of porn. The latest volume of the series is Can You Be A Porn Star? Volume 5 & 6 and it was amazingly similar to the earlier volumes of the series, right down to the vote tally at the end of each show (given some of the comments and similarity in the amount of votes women got, I strongly suspect the entire voting gimmick was made up; particularly when the strongest performers got the worst scores). If you liked the earlier DVDs in the series, this would be more of the same with different cast members but I'd suggest it to newbies more than anyone else.

Each episode would have four gals compete with the entire series having either 32 or 28 gals (depending on which source you believe; the box cover or the narration of the show) and the home viewer could go online and vote for which gal they liked the most. The DVD consisted of two episodes, each of which followed a strict formula where the gals would introduce themselves, where they're from and a little about themselves before they had a short slumber party designed more to titillate than provide any real heat. After that, each gal gave a strip tease dance called a Centerfold Moment where they could display all that they had before the cameras and celebrity judges. There would then be a sex challenge; where the gals would oil wrestle or play an adult version of pin the tail on the donkey (sticking a butt plug where it needs to go), or engage in a pizza eating contest. The gals would use props like vibrators to convince the judges they'd be good in scenes. The gals would then have a group interview with Dr. Ava Cadell before they'd partake in a single scene that the judges, mostly former porn stars themselves, would evaluate as a group from a dark room. The guys used in some of the scenes (there seemed to be more meat puppets this time) were fairly generic (I only recognized a few of them) but with the emphasis on the gals, this is understandable.

I'd echo Ginger Lynn's comments that none of them were "star" material although I've seen several in action numerous times and as much as I used to truly enjoy Ginger's performances, half of the contestants seemed far more at ease sexually than she ever did (back in the 80's). Otherwise, Tabitha still creeped me out with her cosmetic surgeries and seemed to be there much like Mary; for name recognition only (and to get exposure on the Howard Stern Show). The wonderful world of porn has a lot better to offer and maybe if the series would've changed some of the challenges a bit more or shown some creativity, I'd have liked it more. Here's a list of the gals as they were interviewed:

Camille- 25 year old gal from the Czech Republic
Ivy-20 year old gal from California
Lillian-20 year old from Arizona
Dusty-19 year old gal from Ohio
Sabrina Snow-a cute bleach blonde from California
Jassie-a skinny hotty from Las Vegas
Corina Taylor-a weird looking gal from Arkansas
Jacqueline Feline-a Goth chick claiming to be 19 years old and from California

Summary: Can You Be A Porn Star? Volume 5 & 6 was worth a rating of Rent It at best and that's as much given for sentimental value as anything else. The gals ranged from cute to creepy and the professed "winners" that got to go to the final volume of the contest (in order to win a contract and $100,000) weren't even close to impressing me that they were the best of the batch. I know it's just a bit of showmanship but it might've been nice if the realism could've allowed the winners to look like winners or somehow stand out from the pack, something they simply didn't do. I'm almost interested in seeing how the series will end but I won't lose sleep over it unless there are better gals next time.

For better choices in porn, check out: 2004's Top Porn List and 2003's Top Porn List.

You can email me with questions at Houstondon @ hotmail.com if you have any constructive criticism of the review too. :) Also you can follow me on twitter @HoustonDon

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