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College Guide How To Get More Pussy


Studio: Shane's World » Review by Disco Dirge » Review Date: 8/7/05



XCritic's Advice: Watch On Demand

Genre: Straight Instructional
Director: Unknown
Cast:: Penny Flame, Missy Monroe, Kinzie Kenner, Vanessa Lane, Terri Summers, Courtney Cummz, Trent Saluri, Jerry, Jack Venice, Scott Nails
Length: 139 mins
Production Date: June 2005

Audio Visual:
In a Nutshell - Acceptable and Professional
Filmed in 1.33:1 digital video, the image quality of College Guide How to Get More Pussy is actually pretty good. While the sets and backgrounds are as basic as a hired hotel room in some cases (empty spaces with minimal furnishings), the lighting is not overly bright or too dark, and the framing keeps the fucking front and center. If there is a downside to the direction, it's the desire to shoot everything at an off-kilter, MTV style angle. While whoever was behind the lens may have thought this was clever, it grows annoying after a while. On the sonic side, the Dolby Digital Stereo is a tad bass-heavy, but otherwise it is well modulated. The dialogue is crisp, clear and easily understandable.

Extras:
In a Nutshell - Slightly Above-Average
The main added feature is a bonus sex scene between two nameless individuals. It is unknown if this is a deleted sequence from the film (the set-up sounds like it could be a school-based scenario) or an offering from another Shane's World production. Whatever the case may be, the action is pretty average with limited passion between the players. About the only unusual aspect in the entire scene is the actress's desire to have a pillow pushed onto her face during intercourse. She seems to enjoy the near suffocation implication (Score: 2 out of 5). The rest of the added content consists of "More Footage" (outtakes and some behind the scenes sequences), "Interview with Penny Flame" (light and rather fluffy), "Cast Bios" (interesting), "Trailers" and a "Photo Gallery" (standard snooze-fare).

First Impressions:
It's really hard to get a handle on what College Guide How to Get More Pussy is trying to be. Part of the film plays like a parody of all those Girls Gone Wild/Real Kids Talk About Real Issues kind of presentations. Penny Flame is our guide throughout this two hour hardcore/self help extravaganza, and she tries everything she can to evoke both a smile and some sensuality from the material. At other times, College Guide How to Get More Pussy wants to be a rollicking comedy. It even offers a non-hardcore opening sequence that has a runaway vagina battling an angry Asian man, martial arts style. We get a game show spoof and some surreal bits featuring a couple of non-sex performers. Still, this is your basic pornographic pow-wow. The filmmakers will occasionally stop the suck and fuck to have roundtable discussions about what gets a girl's attention, or how to properly approach gals in a bar.

The Sex:
There is one big issue plaguing College Guide How to Get More Pussy that may bother some people, but overall, the hardcore element here is acceptable. Specifically, each sequence offers its own porno pros and cons. Let's being with:

Scene 1: Penny Flame, Missy Monroe, Trent Saluri

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Acts Performed: Foreplay, Mutual Masturbation, Cunnilingus, Face Sitting, Tit Sucking. Dueling Head, Ball Action, Cowgirl, Ass Slapping, Reverse Cowgirl, Doggy, Doggy Pile Driver, Mish, Scissors, $hot in Mouth, Oral Clean-up
Score: 2.5 out of 5
There is a basic premise to College Guide How to Get More Pussy that you will just have to accept if you are going to get any enjoyment whatsoever out of this DVD. While most porn actresses can appear rather long in the tooth, everyone associated with this title, from the gals on down to the guys, look like refugees from a junior high school, not a community college. They push the limits of legality - indeed, 'barely' doesn't so justice to how jailbait a few of these performers appear. Penny and Missy are perfect examples. Along with their 'almost minor' as meat puppet, they really give off the vibe of first timers trying out different techniques with a hard-up guy. There is lots of sex in this scene, but it is rather systematic and antiseptic. First Penny gets her pussy serviced, then Missy. The back and forth can grow boring and occasionally interrupts the flow of the sex. Still, this is a decent sequence with some sizzle.

Scene 2: Kinzie Kenner, Jerry
Acts Performed: Blow Job, Cunnilingus, Tongue Fucking, Mish, Reverse Cowgirl, Doggy, Cowgirl, Big V, $hot on Chest
Score: 3 out of 5
Kinzie continues to add to the statutory sentiments as she offers up a full on fuck session with her rather anonymous male partner Jerry. This couple truly compliments each other, with Ms. K amplifying the arousal with her various body gestures and vocalizations. We even get the elusive Big V as part of the hardcore. For those of you wondering what that position is in the vernacular, just image regular cowgirl but with both partners seated on the ground. Otherwise, this is hot heat with lots of meat as Jerry jumpstarts Kinzie's motor over and over again.

Scene 3: Vanessa Lane, Jack Venice
Acts Performed: Blow Job, Cunnilingus, Doggy, Mish, Cowgirl, $hot on Ass, Oral Clean-up
Score: 3 out of 5
All throughout the buildup to this scene, Vanessa is touted as a seething sexual dynamo - and Jack is described as a professional who puts the 'porn' back into pornographic. So we expect something that will literally tear the roof off the sucker and peel the paint from the walls. Well, we don't quite achieve that level of erotica, but this duo really does a dynamite job in the hardcore arena. Vanessa is very aggressive, taking everything Jack has to give and then some. It's too bad then that the selection of positions is so poor. We only get three maneuvers before Mr. Venice's man broth is ready to boil over. Such a quick end to what is otherwise a pretty steamy session is a letdown.

Scene 4: Terri Summers, Jerry
Acts Performed: Foreplay, Cunnilingus, Salad Tossing, Blow Job, Doggy, V to M, Cowgirl, Reverse Cowgirl, Spooning, $hot on Stomach, Oral Clean-up
Score: 2.5 out of 5
For anyone who likes to play sex games and tease their partner with safe, slinky kinky play, this will be a great sequence. Jerry breaks out a blindfold and spends a good 10 minutes kissing, cuddling and fondling Terri while she is vulnerable and very receptive. It even carries over to the first instances of oral. Once the scarf comes off, it's standard sex, with Terri and Jerry really enjoying each other. The level of arousal is obvious, and Ms. Summers responses indicate she's incredibly hot here. Thanks to some V to M and a lot of position parameters, this is a very intense experience, perhaps second on the disc after the J man's work with Kinzie.

Scene 5: Courtney Cummz, Scott Nails
Acts Performed: Cunnilingus, Mish, Spoon, V to M, Blow Job, Cowgirl, Doggy, $hot on Tits
Score: 2 out of 5
While the game show premise is kind of lame (there are a few funny bits), the resulting fuck and suck between Courtney and Scott has its moments. Both actors definitely suffer from the "born too late" syndrome, but when you ignore their obvious age issues, they seem like worthy porn performers. The sex is regular and occasionally quite intense, and when Ms. Cummz gets cooking, she seems to literally swelter. Still, it would have been nice to have a tad more variety (the spoon sequence takes forever to finish) and Scott occasionally has "stamina" issues. But overall, this scenes sends College Guide How to Get More Pussy off on a very positive note.

Disco Dirge Peter Meter Rating: 2.5 out of 5 (Rent It/Recommended)
Cohabitation Certification: Granted
The Disco Dirge Peter Meter is in quite a quandary over this title. The age issues definitely drag down the scores, but the humor and the humping are occasionally quite effective. Couples will probably enjoy this title, as the sex is straightforward and degradation-free. But they may also find some of the teen talk sequences a bit much to wade through. In general, fans of Shane's World and their work will definitely want to check this out. Others may have to settle with a rental before picking up their own copy. While most people attend a university for matriculation, not non-stop copulation, College Guide How to Get More Pussy is a semi-successful romp through the dos and don'ts of collegiate carnality. You may not learn many real life lessons, but then again, isn't that the case with almost all academia?





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