XCritc.com Adult DVD Reviews
Porn Reviews » Adult Movie Reviews » Absolute Ass 5

Absolute Ass 5

Studio: Digital Sin » Review by Don Houston » Review Date: 12/20/05

XCritic's Advice: Highly Recommended

Absolute Ass 5

Exquisite Multimedia/Venom

Genre: Gonzo

Director: Jordan Septo

Cast: Brooke Haven, Tony T., Luscious Lopez, Cheyne Collins, Vanessa Lane, Brett Rockman, Scotty Lyons, Missy Monroe, Julie Night, Lee Stone

Length: 140 minutes

Date of Production: 8/30/2005

Extra's: The best extra this time was the 21 minute long Behind the Scenes feature that showed the cast off both having sex and outside the usual constraints of their scenes. I liked it as they were often more natural in the setting when the main camera wasn't pointed at them and the manner in which they liked to play with the BTS aspect of the extras section. It was funny how some of the talent mentioned how frequently they got cancelled when others flaked (mentioning Sun; the publicist from Bryan Xin's company by name in fact) but there were other cute moments too. It was a value adding extra and it provided me with some chuckles as the ladies were in rare form outside their scenes. There was also a photogallery, some trailers, and a cum shot compilation from the scenes as well as a cardboard protective sleeve for the DVD case.

Condoms: None

Audio/Video Quality: Absolute Ass 5 was presented in the usual 1.33:1 ratio full frame color as originally shot by director Jordan Septo for release by Venom Digital Media, an apparent subsidiary of Exquisite Multimedia. I haven't been fortunate enough to see the entire series but my limited exposure has proven the worth of Jordan's skills as a pornographer. The lighting was solid in most cases (just a tad more fill lighting in a few close ups would've made it great) and that led to limited amounts of grain and video noise compared to other releases by other directors. The composition of the shots was virtually always favorable to the ladies, focusing on their strengths rather than minor flaws in most cases, and that added some measure of fun to the scenes here. The DVD was mastered well enough and I thought the visual elements worked very nicely generally speaking. The stereo audio was slightly hollow in the limited setting of the corner of the room where the loveseat was located. I could hear the vocals well enough but they were sometimes a bit mixed in terms of quality and most of the background noises were minimal.

-- sponsored by --

Body of Review: Jordan Septo is one of those directors whose work I don't get to see nearly enough these days and that's a shame because I almost always think highly of his movies in terms of the factors that he can control. I know that if you mention a few directors, like Jules Jordan, John Stagliano, or Michael Ninn, you immediately think of a certain style each employs in their pornography but lesser known talents also have their merits and that's why it's even more important for companies to promote them. Jordan's latest release is Absolute Ass 5, the anal themed series I last saw in Absolute Ass 2. In most of the scenes included here, the gals did some tease and then they took cocks in their ass like seasoned professionals. If you're looking for anal action, this is certainly a stop you'll want to make on your rounds and here's a breakdown of the scenes by cast and action, noting that no condoms were used here:

Scene One: Brooke Haven, a curvy bleach blonde with what could only be referred to as a killer ass, was up first in a scene with Tony T. on a couch. From the moment she bent over and slapped her well toned ass for the camera, I knew she'd be making the viewer happy. She's cute, has large implants, and a very attractive face but many of you will like it most that they skipped all the preliminaries to go straight to the anal action. She took him in quickly and well; with her ass in the air to provide better leverage for him and her mouth ready for lots of ATM. He got some extended head from her afterwards but the multitude of anal positions were the primary reason why you'd go for this scene. She wasn't the most active anal queen when it came to bouncing on his dick but she was capable nonetheless.

Scene Two: Luscious Lopez, the raven haired gal with the large booty displayed prominently on the front DVD cover, was up next in a scene with Cheyne Collins. I know some have fussed about the size of her nose but it was the size of her ass that I cared about (and her all natural breasts sure didn't hurt matters one little bit). She followed the formula by teasing the camera on the couch at the direction of Jordan Septo and while her body was slightly disproportionate from the waist down, I doubt many ass fans will care (as she gets older, it might balloon outwards but that'll be long after her porn career is over). After the masturbation sequence, Cheyne came in to bone away at her ass and she verbally encouraged him as he hammered away. This led to some ATM and lengthier oral but her active manner of pumping back was more enthusiastic than Brooke so I can see why she was on the front cover. She also spent more time getting her pussy pummeled after the anal and took the facial better but the anal was still the primary function of this heated scene.

Scene Three: Vanessa Lane, a very lean brunette with pretty eyes that has drawn criticism for looking like a meth whore by some of the meaner people online, followed the formula well enough as she teased the camera. To be fair, she was built for speed and not for comfort but those green eyes lit up when Brett Rockman and Scotty Lyons walked in and dropped their draws for her. Obviously, Brett was better built but she gave them equal time when sucking them off to get them extra hard for the coming DP. This scene was more balanced in terms of sex acts than the other scenes shown to this point since she took them in her pussy a lot more but there was no doubt that she could actively take a cock in her ass with the best of them too. The taste testing was as prominent as the other scenes too and they ended this mechanically passionate scene by unleashing lots of semen on her waiting face.

Scene Four: Missy Monroe, the nasty brunette (these days at least) who has developed a large following in porn circles given her general antics in movies, started the next scene by masturbating while lying to Jordan in a coy manner. He responded that she'd need to be on the receiving end of some anal to pay her back for it and the stretching out of her anal passage with multiple fingers was only a prelude to Cheyne Collins attacking it like he was paid a bonus for tearing her a new one. Four fingers in her ass was a sight to behold but they were put in there slowly while his penis sawed in and out like a maniac so the size variable had to be weighed against the power strokes he gave her. That her little whimpers indicated she was getting off was just icing on the cake but she didn't let ATM fans down any either. I wasn't keen on her blemishes and the vaginal was kind of tame but he poured out a good sized load into her mouth and her green eyes played well with the camera at the end of the action.

Scene Five: Julie Night, another gal sporting black hair that I've known longer with another color, was up last with the massive Lee Stone in the mostly barren room. She didn't get to give much tease footage as he stormed into the room to slap her breasts and otherwise play with them before she blew him handily. That led to him tasting her and some vaginal riding that was perhaps the best of the show; leading me to think the scene was more generic than the others (and could be used in any number of series for that matter). They did switch over to anal but it wasn't the primary style of kung fu fucking like the other scenes so if that bothers you, consider yourselves warned. She did some taste testing and orally played with his load but she never swallowed it and while I liked her act, it wasn't as anal as the other scenes.

Summary: Absolute Ass 5 was a cunning array of stunts worthy of being rated as Highly Recommended for the sheer volume of heated, hardcore anal action as displayed by a diverse and appealing cast of hotties alone but the extras, the technical values, and the quality of action were all factors in this rating too. Septo might be one of the better kept secrets in porn but one of the things that stands out about most of his scenes is how the talent seems to go the extra mile in order to provide more passion in their work. In all though, I like his work and hope to see more of it in 2006.

You can email me with questions at Houstondon @ hotmail.com if you have any constructive criticism of the review too. :) Also you can follow me on twitter @HoustonDon

comments powered by Disqus
Popular Reviews

Stacked 5
Summer Lust
Future Angels 3
Girl Next Door Likes It Dirty 9
Anal Threesomes
Hot Wife 2
The Preacher's Daughter
The Feral Woman

Featured Reviews

Get XCritic Via Email:

Enter your email address:

Delivered by FeedBurner