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Take My Wife

Studio: Vivid » Review by Don Houston » Review Date: 12/28/05

XCritic's Advice: Watch It Online

Take My Wife

Vivid Entertainment

Genre: Feature

Director: Paul Thomas

Cast: Dani Woodward, Nick Manning, Mercedez, Justin Magnum, Brooke, Nick Jacobs, Nikki Hunter
Non-sex roles by: Ben Hoffman, Shylar Cobi, others uncredited

Length: 87.5 minutes

Date of Production: 5/6/2005

Extra's: Most people will appreciate the 5 bonus scenes, the first three starring Mercedez. I prefer unique content so the 17.5 minute long Behind the Scenes feature was more interesting to me. It had a lot of fun and material from those in front as well as behind the camera so as a historical time capsule; it'll allow those in the future to have a glimpse on the set of the shoot too. I thought Shylar stole the show every time he came on camera with his dry sense of humor but Paul was no slacker in that department either. There were 2 photogalleries, a limited biography for Mercedez, a positions room, trailers for titles like The New Devil In Miss Jones, When Strangers Meet, Circus and Janine's Been Blackmaled; a double sided DVD cover, and some of the usual spam for phone sex and other Vivid products.

Condoms: Yes

-- sponsored by --

Audio/Video Quality: Take My Wife was presented in the usual 1.33:1 ratio full frame color as original shot by director Paul Thomas for Vivid Entertainment. The lighting was almost always pleasing to the eye, limiting the grain and other visual issues I've had in the past with Vivid. I'm led to believe that they've been actively working on this and everything they've been doing has been appreciated in this regard. The composition of the shots was favorable in most of the scenes too, leading me to think more care than average was put into the movie. There were no compression artifacts and in all, I liked the visuals a lot. The 2.0 Dolby Digital stereo sounded like it was shot in monaural and the music had the only separation between the channels. There were times when the wind noise got in the way but this was part of the movie. Still, it was a step up from many past efforts and I thought it worthy of mentioning.

Body of Review: Paul Thomas has been in porn even longer than I've been watching it (I've been watching it about 25 years since it came up) and his longevity in the field has come, in part at least, from his ability to evolve over time. He may not be my favorite director these days but when he wants to, he can provide a solid show full of entertaining sex and a good story besides. His latest release is Take My Wife, a small feature porn centering on a couple of guys wanting to break into the country music business but stuck in the boonies with attractive wives. I'm not going to kill the story for you but it was decent enough to hold the scenes together logically. The sexual star of the show was curvy MILF Mercedez and I think she was looking very good here so fans will have that to look forward to but the other scenes were even better. Here's a quick look at the scenes by cast and action, noting that condoms were used but didn't get in the way, with the back of the box comments added in to give you an idea of the theme:

"Matrimony? Yes. Holy? Hardly.
When a small town crooner gets stranded in a rural town, all the country wannabes vie for his attention. Turns out the only way they can get to his mic is through his pants, and especially if they're married... to someone else. Paul Thomas presents Take My Wife, a story about the Gland Old Opry, where the nuts aren't on Minnie Pearl's hat, they're banging against Nicki Hunter's chin! And the only Waylon going on is the wailin' from the girls getting hammered backstage! Take My Wife. Please."

Scene One: Dani Woodward, looking very fresh and attractive, was up first with Nick Manning in the wide open spaces of the countryside in the midday sun outside. The lighting was very good on the two as they went down on one another and boned like two teenagers in lust along the trail in their padded loveseat. Her oral was far too short but it was still sweet as she deep throated him and I was thankful that he wasn't as obnoxious as usual during the scene. She was also an energetic ride in his lap with her pussy tearing up on his shaft in several positions before he rubbed out a load to her face. I wasn't sure why she was labeled as a special guest star but it was a great way to start the show and the scene almost seemed like nothing Paul had directed in the recent past (maybe he had someone else shoot it).

Scene Two: Mercedez, the curvy contract gal on the front DVD cover, was up next on a black leather couch with Justin Magnum in front of the picture window in the living room. They necked a bit and he went down on her gingerly to warm her up before she gave him a slow, sultry blowjob. It wasn't a bad BJ but after Dani's great job, it seemed a little weak but she made up for it with a little tease footage before the inevitable romp. She rode him slowly in her pussy but kept an active pace that reminded me of a lap dance with benefits and I remembered why I liked her upon watching it. She then gave some more head before jerking him off with her massive mammaries. It was a pretty solid scene overall.

Scene Three: Brooke, a curvy gal with a fine fleshy ass and winning smile, was up next in a scene with Nick Jacobs in the back of the open van. Her short blue jean skirt allowed the world to see her ass cheeks wiggle and the tight white top gave more than a hint of her chest as she went to the van to masturbate in front of him; so he did the right thing and offered his lube services (as a mechanic, it was his duty to do so). Her face sitting ended too quickly and she responded with a limited blowjob that turned into a vaginal ride on the seating outside. She was too passive for my tastes but he dropped a load on her abdomen soon enough and that was it.

Scene Four: Nikki Hunter, the vivacious blonde with the accentuated curves, was up next as a cowgirl dancing with Justin Magnum to some pretty fair country music. They then went to the loft for a hay ride of another dimension where she teased him from up high and he joined her within moments. He went down on her and fingered her for a bit and she attacked his shaft at a nice tempo in return. I wished the music had stayed the same but as the scene progressed, it went to a score and then a generic bit that did nothing for me though she was still unaffected by it (as it was added later). Nicki's a gal that can provide an active scene and she did just that as she bounced on his meat and offered herself up in doggy style before he rubbed out an abdominal load during the missionary. I've seen much hotter from her but it was an okay scene to watch a few times.

Scene Five: Mercedez, in an effort to do the right thing for her man, ended the show by embracing Nick Manning in her little trailer on the tiger print couch. This was the one time that the lighting was truly sub-optimal but it was still better than most of Paul's works of late though the grain did bug me. The oral by both of them was decent but she was less active in the limited positions she did here (loved the ass though; sweet!) and it came off as almost a filler in that regard. It didn't dampen my appreciation of the movie though and ended with his load on her chest (sadly, he started his dirty talk routine at that point).

Summary: Take My Wife was a decent flick for Mercedez fans who will likely love it given her looks here. I thought that sexually it was worth a rating of Rent It but the technical values, the BTS feature, and the ladies were all pleasant to watch. Otherwise, Mercedez has long seemed to be a stick in the mud (her comments in the BTS feature say it all) and unable to let herself go during her sex scenes but she's easy on the eyes for guys that like curves so I can see why Vivid would employ her too. In all, the replay value broke the tie on rating this one but it looked like another step forward in terms of technical improvements and that alone gives me reason appreciate the movie in the bigger picture. Fans of Mercedez will still find this one a must own for the way it made her look so good though.

You can email me with questions at Houstondon @ hotmail.com if you have any constructive criticism of the review too. :) Also you can follow me on twitter @HoustonDon

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