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Sk8ter Summer

Studio: Top Shelf » Review by Alexx O'Toole » Review Date: 3/12/06

XCritic's Advice: Skip It

CAST: Zdeno Kovar, Pavel Molek, Milos Novak, Ctirad Frolek, Bobuslav Novy, Norbert Zavodnik

The Good Stuff
I don't have any clue as to what the premise is for this movie, as I could find no information about the DVD online and apparently the studio does not have a website either. The movie's title, Sk8ter Summer is ultimately misleading. Whereas it may be summer wherever this movie was shot, there are no skaters to be found. If you are expecting skater punk kids with tattoos, raggedy jeans and skateboards, as the title suggests, you will be sadly disappointed, just as I was. Apparently a "sk8ter" in this culture is just a young gay guy. The movie is made up of three scenes with various eastern European-looking boys, paired off in twos doing the nasty. Most of guys have cut members and shaved balls and bung holes. This is safe-sex film so all actors are wearing condoms. And as there are no credits in this movie I have no idea as to who is who, so I just used their physical descriptions as their names.

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The first scene begins with two guys walking down a street, Tall Crewcut Man and Preppy Blonde. They reach their destination, an apartment, and there is a Vespa-like scooter in the middle of the room. Apparently scooters get guys hot, because they sure like to do close-ups of the vehicle. IT'S SO SEXXXXYYY. Anywho...Crewcut and Preppy slowly undress and then the music starts. Here is where the clothes go from being on to off and preppy goes from having on his sweater to it being gone. Preppy starts by jerking off Crewcut then, BAM, Crewcut is completely naked with Preppy going down on him, but there is no enthusiasm. Of course, they end up with Crewcut on the scooter, receiving some oral action from Preppy on his nice, big, veiny tool. Here is where you can tell it's gay-for-pay as Preppy doesn't even attempt to deep-throat; he just bobs on the head of Crewcut's schlong, getting into several different boring positions on and around the Scooter. Another abrupt switch, and Crewcut is giving Preppy some mouth lovin'. Preppy's equipment is not as impressive as Crewcut's, although Crewcut looks like he knows what he is doing with it. Preppy's balls get a tongue bath from Crewcut while he strokes his meat. The anal action kicks off in several different positions, again around the scooter, and finally ends with Crewcut giving Preppy some backdoor action while Preppy leans on scooter. The money shot of Crewcut jerking and shooting on Preppy's left buttcheek leaves one feeling cold as he seems happy his job is done.
[Who Knows | Jacking, Oral, Anal | Doggy | Condoms: Yes | ]

Ooh. "Does my ass look fat in these jeans?" is how this scene can be best described. We start immediately in a bedroom with a blonde guy and a guy who in a few minutes will reveal an impressive piece of meat, thereby earning him the name of Big Dick. Some kissing and nipple licking as the guys undress, and surprise, both guys actually get hard. The blonde gets some head first, then we swap and Big Dick gets some oral fun. Another abrupt scene change and Big Dick is on his back being screwed by the blonde. Another misfortune of being gay-for-pay is that glorious Big Dick is now soft as a wet noodle. Their rhythm never alters even though they switch through various positions from laying-down doggy to standing-up doggy. This scene is the most disappointing, because Big Dick is moaning like there is no tomorrow and the blonde laughs because they both know it's fake. We again cut to the money shot and holy smokes, the blonde apparently came already and it looks like it was impressive because he has cum on his own face. Too bad you don't get to see that, as our infallible editor seems to have left out that part. Big Dick strokes his junk for a bit and finally cums on the blonde's stomach as the scene ends with the blonde licking the cum off his lips.
[Two Other Guys | Oral, Anal, Jacking | Spooning, Doggy | Condoms: Yes | ]

We are back on the street and a young guy checks his phone and then meets up with a giant of a guy. The scene moves to an apartment with cheesy plastic outdoor furniture inside. Blonde and Giant sit down in chairs and begin rubbing their crotches. Blonde whips his stuff out first, welcoming Giant to go to town on the young guy's stuff before they switch. Giant has a nice big cock, which would be great if he got any part of the action, but he doesn't this scene has an almost "older brother, younger brother" feel to it. Switching positions, the little blonde buggers the big giant guy, offering some OK close-ups in this setup. The party ends with Giant laying on table being banged by the young blonde. Giant cums on his own stomach and then young blonde cums on his thigh. Then bing-bang-boom. THE END.
[Two More Guys | Oral, Anal | Doggy, Missionary | Condoms: Yes | ]



It looks like this was shot on video, and it's nothing special. The movie is shot all on tripod so there is very little change in angles, but the production is clear and well lit. Like the video, the sound is plain jane, with minimal dialogue and a typical porno soundtrack. If you can understand the language, then I'm sure the dialogue would be more entertaining. "Hey is that a bottle of vodka in your pocket or are you just glad to see me?"


Nothing. Not even scene selections. I almost get the feeling that you should feel lucky to have even received an entire 60-minute movie.

At the End of the Night

This is a typical low-budget gay-for-pay movie. The studs, while nice to look at physically, have trouble performing, as this movie suffers from a plague of flaccid cocks. With the guy laughing in the second scene at his partner's overzealous feigned moaning, you get the feeling that the guys are there just to get their 50 rubles and go as fast as they can. The editing is off as well, as pants go from zipped to unzipped and scenes end abruptly and begin in the same fashion. The DVD has no redeeming value, with no bonus features. On the off chance that you actually liked a performance you are S.O.L. girlfriend. There are no credits to put a name to a member. Maybe they were just too embarrassed to take credit. Skip this one, my friends. It's a limp-dicked waste of time.

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