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Puma Swede's School of Hardcore

Studio: Black Widow Media » Review by Saul Good » Review Date: 4/15/06

XCritic's Advice: Watch It Online

Genre: Straight

Director: Ricky Wrecker

Cast: Puma Swede, Hailey Young, Alicia Allighotti, Nadia Hilton, Aaliya Jolie, Shy Love

Length: 1hr 40 min

Production Date: Black Widow Productions, 2006

Extras: Chapter Selection: Without Act Access
Photo Shoot: A pathetic, two minute video montage.

Audio/Video: The Audio of the film is presented in 2.0 stereo. For the most, the sound is what is expected from a typical porn flick. Although there were a number of occasions when the sound grew faint or there was some strange hollowing effect, the voices and noises of the actors could usually be heard with little effort. The Video of the film is standard full frame color. The picture itself is good, images and colors are decent. The editing and some of the camera work is a little annoying because acts within scenes tended to jump around without any attention to flow. The film had a slight amateur look to it that made it more enjoyable.

Body of Review: Puma Swede speaks poor English, but who says you have to speak perfectly to teach. To teach sex at least. Puma offers five courses on the art of lovemaking. Although these aren't necessarily instructional segments, each scene does try to center around a particular subject. Including: Monkey style, deep throating, ATM and cumswapping.

Scene 1: Shy Love
Acts Included: Oral, Vaginal, Anal, Facial
Condoms: No
Tall horse faced Puma Swede is an instructor of the School of Hardcore. Her student today is Shy Love and she will be learning to fuck 'Monkey Style.' Puma offers little more than a position explanation before throwing her protege into the lion's den. Shy is a very attractive brunette, with sexy, round thighs and a cute face. A guy with a Hasidic Jew's hat and haircut walks in naked and crams his cock down her throat for some immediate duck calling. She takes a good deal of this, more than she can handle and at times pulls away for a breath of cock-free air. With a dripping wet cock, the guy pummels her pussy in doggy while Puma films with a hand held camera. Tonsil poking is the main feature of this scene and it returns again and again. There is nothing exciting about this and when the two actors start more boning, their energy is good, fucking decent, but they switch positions and acts too roughly and too often. And everytime the guy's cock comes out of her, there's an urge to have Shy Love choke on it. She does give some nice run time with the Monkey Style when it finally does occur. With her bare feet on his thighs and her tight ass pumping at his cock, Shy is damn sexy to watch. The guy drills her ass in doggy for a few more minutes before unloading in her mouth.

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Scene 2: Hailey Young
Acts Included: Oral, Vaginal, Facial
Condoms: No
Today's lesson sounds like yesterday's lesson: gagging and throat fucking. Puma offers Hailey Young some silly instructions including the importance of 'stringers' (spit bridges) and 'finger banging'. Puma helps Hailey undress and we get the first look at Hailey's amazing, tiny body. Small, teenage boobies and a tight frame make her a sexy star. The two chew on each other's shaved pussys for a while before they take turns finger banging each other. Puma sticks fingers down Hailey's throat until she gags and Hailey does the same. Hailey seems to be really reacting, but Puma doesn't seem to be affected and so she offers some mild coughing. Before the cock comes into play, Hailey's flat chest is wet with her own saliva. Hailey can't take much cock, she turns red, her eyes bulge, a vein on her forehead grows thick like a rope, but she persists. If you like to watch a gal that really gets choked on a cock, this scene has plenty of it. After a while you kind of feel sorry for her because even though it's not rough and forced Hailey is having a hard time. Puma joins in to take some of the pressure off her and the two make a decent number of 'stringers'. Hailey gets her pussy pounded in a number of positions, but again we always come back to the gagging. And each time it is choppily segued. The guy pops into Hailey's mouth and she snowballs it into Puma's.

Scene 3: Alicia Allighotti
Acts Included: Oral, Vaginal, Anal, ATM, Facial
Condoms: No
The third lesson in Puma's sex course covers ATM. And again, after nothing more than a brief definition, Puma turns Alicia loose on the porn set. Alicia is a fair brunette with decent looks. Her white fishnet stockings are sexy and she has a shy school girl cool about her. The two taste each other's assholes before involving themselves with a threeway cock suckoff. Alicia is a pretty dry babe. Her reactions to the action are limited. She fingers her ass for a few minutes, warming it up for the cock entry. But by the time it comes there has been so much wasted time. Fingers, a dildo, some more throating. All fun and games, but it moves with a slowness that seems to deliberately extend the films run time. Puma rests her head on Alicia ass and when the guy pulls out, she sucks the stink stick. Aside from the sluggishness of this scene, there are some great moments of amateur-like shots. Alicia's ass is wet and Puma's too, so everything is slippery and glistens, not that clean, pristine look of other films. This one has some rawness. The guy unloads into Alicia's mouth and she and Puma kiss. Overall some decent action, but it's a tad stretched thin.

Scene 4: Aaliya Jolie and Nadia Hilton
Acts Included: Oral, Vaginal
Condoms: No
The cum-swapping lesson involves two super hot blondes. Both are really skinny and put Puma in the shadows. They have perfect bodies and polar opposite breast sizes which make them a great pair of pairs. Puma has them practice their cum-swapping techniques with water and so the two dribble water from one mouth to the other. Not much happens in this scene which makes it a real disappointment. As the guy fucks one of the gals, the other doesn't seem to know what to do and either sits to the side or just kisses the other gal. Occasionally, one will leave the scene altogether. The sex is decent, particularly when he ping pongs between the two gal's vaginas. But I never saw an all out cum-swap. They announced it and got ready for it a few times. And once the gals kissed but it looked like a spit kiss and not with cum. I never saw or heard him cum at all in fact. Regardless, Puma gives both gals an A+. I give a C-.

Scene 5: Puma Swede
Acts Included: Oral, Vaginal, Anal
Condoms: No
In the final lesson of the film, the teacher does some in class role playing. Puma already looks like she's been manhandled for some time, but she's going to endure more. Naked and kneeling, she receives cock to the back of her throat until she gags and spits. A dildo is crammed down her esophagus until her eyes water and her makeup smears. She lies on a coach with her head over the edge to get throat banged upside down. Then, like much of the rest of the disc, we go from one act to another with little attention to flow. Anal doggy over the couch, cut to kneeling on the floor giving more head. The edits aren't sharp as the acts last at least a minute or two, but they lack the flow most films assume. Before it's all over, Puma looks like one of those crying clown masks. I hope she learned her lesson.

Concluding Words: The best thing about this film is its cheap quality. All the scenes involve the same Hadistic looking dude, Puma prancing around the set and occasionally offering a hand, and the too often slip of cameramen and equipment into the shot. Even the video has a slight amateur fuzz to it, lending it to be a film for one to not expect much from. The main downfall of the film is the editing and camera work. Some more attention could have been given toward direction too. At times the actors were not in sync with each other. Nor was the flow of the acts smooth or consistent. And while this film tries in some respects to be a film to suit a number of tastes, not each 'lesson' works. The cum-swapping course, fails to produce a true on-camera swap. And the Monkey Style scene spends more time on deep throating and gagging. But I did enjoy the talent, all of whom are attractive and give mediocre, albeit too often reserved, performances. And I think the amateurish look of the film, which is evident not only in the video quality and style, but in the sex (which at times is sloppy and unscripted) actually helps the film and give it a uniqueness many of the more commonplace features do not offer. Despite this, I can't go beyond a Rent It recommendation. A stronger hand at the camer and a greater attention to consistency would have upped the grade on this one.


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