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My First Porn 5


Studio: Digital Playground » Review by Don Houston » Review Date: 5/7/06



XCritic's Advice: Recommended

My First Porn 5 (Jana Cova)

Digital Playground

Genre: Gonzo, Comedy

Director: Robby D.

Cast: Penny Flame, Scott Nails, Kaiya Lynn, Eric Masterson, Devaun, Ben English, Victoria Sweet, Jana Cova, Valentina Vaughn, Haley Scott, Tommy Gunn
Non-sex roles by: Non-sex roles by: Cody Bangs, Jelena Jensen, Harry Bali; (Joey Pulgadas on voiceovers)

Length: 97.5 minutes

Date of Production: 7/2/2005

Extras: The standardized extras were a photogallery, a cum-shot recap, a slide show and trailers to movies like Hot Rod For Sinners, Jack's Playground 30, Control 2, Jesse Jane: Marvelous, Jesse Jane: All American Girl, Hard Candy 1, Deeper, Jack's POV, Jack's Big Ass Show 2, My First Porn, My First Porn 2, My First Porn 3, My First Porn 4, Pirates, Island Fever, Jack's Big Tit Show, Porcelain, Teen America 12, Teen America 13, Teen America 14, and numerous trailers to their Virtual Sex line including Virtual Sex with Sophia Santi, Virtual Sex with Teagan Presley, Virtual Sex with Jesse Jane, and Virtual Sex with Nikki Tyler.

Condoms: One

Audio/Video Quality: My First Porn 5 was presented in what appeared to be a 1.85:1 ratio anamorphic widescreen color as originally shot by the talented Robby D. for Digital Playground. The lighting was almost universally solid, greatly limiting most of the grain and video noise during the sex scenes. The amount of shadows was also limited, thanks in large part to the seasoned eye of director Robby but also the others who participated on the project. The composition of the shots enhanced the look of the gals in every case although the limitations of the gonzo format prevented Robby from truly innovating much here. The other good news is that the DVD mastering was as good as ever and I didn't see any compression artifacts. The audio was presented in a 5.1 Dolby Digital Surround English where the vocals seemed to actually have some separation a few times. There was limited music this time but I suspect that'll be the source of humor in an upcoming volume of the series given how so many other aspects of modern porn have been poked fun at in earlier volumes of the series. In large part, this being a gonzo release means the audio wasn't a huge concern but the vocals were clearly discernable and added to the heat of the scenes.

-- sponsored by --

Body of Review: Robby D. is the porn directing icon that got into the business in order to make porn he wanted to see given the lameness of the market at the time. In his lengthy career, he has tried almost every mainstream genre there is, largely succeeding in his efforts to make strokable porn for the masses. His longest running series to date is the Jack's Playground franchise where he plays a guy named Jack that is always working an angle to capture hot women having sex. This branched out several times and the latest release in one of the spin off series is My First Porn 5. The idea behind this series is that Jack is actually shooting porn, not beauty contests or scamming gals with music video work, and as a novice director he tries to incorporate all the flaws of modern porn as what he wants to shoot. The humor of the scenes comes in when he runs into the everyday troubles of the industry (flaky gals, language barriers, over done stereotyped settings and concepts, etc.) and the occasional pearl of wisdom by his mentor, Leo Pradnesh (with a mechanically driven voice over by one of the creative geniuses behind the scenes of the franchise). This particular volume started out with a nod to reviews at DVD Talk so it was of particular interest to the online community (proving the companies really do listen to us, as well as the consumers who voice their concerns openly with constructive criticism) but the cast of women used was very interesting as well, particularly Jana Cova and Penny Flame. Here's a quick look at the scenes by cast and action, noting that only one condom was used and it wasn't that obvious:


"Sales aren't up. Don Houston's fucking killing me. Did you see this review?"

Scene One: Penny Flame, the hotty on the left hand side of the front DVD cover and one of my favorite stars, was up first as she played an 18 year old (badly) performer who was up with a scene with Scott Nails. It was actually pretty interesting seeing her play what amounts to a caricature of her peers, with her masturbating as she aggressively sucked his cock. As always, the camera work was done in such a fashion as to seem like the cameraman was sporting wood of his own and wanting in on the action but that's part of the charm of the series. Once she had satisfactorily slobbed his knob, she bent over for him to go down on, making those noises of hers that make me hot. He then started banging her with some alternating PTM, a titty fuck and an ending facial to close it out. She seemed to be having some fun with the action, displaying a bit of chemistry with Scott, though I'd have liked her to show a more active ride than she did. Still, she was hot and I thought the scene had lots of replay for fans of hers like myself.

Scene Two: Kaiya Lynn, the gal on the right hand side of the front DVD cover, was up next as a hooker in a scene for the fictional movie Just Got Out where the idea was to showcase people just out of prison having sex; Eric "80913" Masterson playing the camera shy parolee wanting to bust into her at every step. Conceptually, the idea was great since it was designed to poke fun at the common belief that most men in porn have all served time in jail and all the women are street walkers making a few extra bucks. The way it was handled invoked the smile of one who knows that stereotypes aren't always accurate as much as the playful poke at some well held beliefs. In any case, the couple were in a motel room and he claimed to "like to eat some ass" and "toss me some salad" (funny for a newly released convict to say, especially since salad tossing generally refers to men getting rimmed) as he ate her out. She blew him with the skill of a seasoned fellatrix before he took her from behind with a condom on. They only did a few positions before he rubbed out a load that she swallowed. It was an okay scene but designed best for major fans of Asian gals.

Scene Three: Devaun, a lean, all natural gal with very pretty eyes, was up next as she claimed to want an average sized cock on the couch (after another funny scene where Jack discussed box covers in the office). She ended up with sexual aggressor Ben English, complaining about the size of his cock until she got the hang of blowing his manly meat. He teased her with it, in fact, to show that she was really a cock hungry harlot and her skillful meat manipulation was appreciated a whole lot. They vaginally screwed in several positions, with her cowgirl being the best of the batch for the way she rode him hard (bouncing on his rod as though she were trying to drain him dry). She was so small compared to the diameter of his dick that it added a vicarious thrill, especially as she glistened with sweat over the action. The scene ended when he jerked off his load into her mouth but she didn't swallow it for those who care. In all, it was a very good scene, with Jack asking her how her "very first porn" scene was.

Scene Four: Victoria Sweet, a diminutive Latina with great DSLs (dick sucking lips) and a pretty face, was up next with Scott Nails in the usual large house. Her character spoke no English and Jack's main concern was that she couldn't read his well written script. Scott has been a regular fixture in the series who has pointed out that no one cares about the dialogue, the setting, or the fancy pants concepts some directors rely on as a crutch and as soon as he told her to suck his dick in Spanish, she complied. I really liked the Spanish talk and her playful manner of handling his dick, showing her oral skills were top notch with some POV camera work added in for good measure. The oral was the mainstay of the scene although there was also some vaginal work that showed the world how active she could work a dick doggy style (I wish all of her peers would watch this part of the scene). It ended when he popped his load onto her small chest and she made a funny comment to the camera.

Scene Five: Jana Cova, the young hotty superstar featured on the center of the front DVD cover, was up next as she began playing with the gorgeous Valentina Vaughn in the living room. The gals started playing with each other as Jack coaxed them on, with each of the ladies sucking the other's nipples and rubbing each other seductively. Once Jack made them start the scene "for real", Valentina started acting like a prima donna, telling them that she was an erotic artist and didn't do stuff like that (her resemblance to Tera Patrick aside, I'd like to see her posing for a while); an obvious goof on the many gals entering the business that come up with extensive lists of what they won't do. She did pose in the buff and looked very hot doing so but it was the even hotter Jana that saved the day with a masturbation scene on the other couch with the large dildo. Seeing the large toy plunging deep inside her sweet little pussy had me fantasizing about an Ebay auction where fans were bidding the used toy up like crazy though I'll admit I'd rather have seen the two ladies working each other over with it. Still, the tease aspect of the action combined well with the solo material; providing some solid diversity to the action (much like other releases by Robby have shown).

Scene Six: Haley Scott, a very well known (and lusted after) gal in porn, played the role of a dumb starlet that didn't understand the conceptual matters involved in the series title as she pretended (much like Penny in the first scene) to be new to the field after telling Jack that she had been in a great many scenes in the prior couple of months. Her partner for the scene was the studly Tommy Gunn and they felt each other up as she mechanically droned on with standard porn dialogue, doing so as a joke more than for real. She then sat on his face and he ate her out as she moaned away, resulting in her blowing him readily when it was her turn. The contrast between his dark tan and her milky white skin was visually appealing but her hip gyrations were even more fulfilling for me as she provided an active ride vaginally and anally. The ending facial was cool too although the juxtaposition of Harry's face on her body seemed out of place (it looked like something was edited out at the last minute).

Summary: My First Porn 5 started off with a lot of humor in the interchange between Cody Bangs and Jack about a review of mine impacting sales. Cody's reply that the movie was shit to begin with caused me to burst out laughing since Robby and I spent some time discussing various aspects of his work earlier this year at the 2006 AEE Show and I think both of us walked away with a lot better understanding of how we each view matters (the benefactor of this discussion are the viewers of his work as much as the readers of my reviews). The movie's humor aside, the sex was often well done and the ladies attractive to me, with the sly commentary about porn industry practices not going unnoticed either. It didn't hurt that the movie had two of my very favorite performers (Jana Cova and Penny Flame) but there was something for almost everyone here and the technical values were on par with Robby's other works of late too. In short, My First Porn 5 had good levels of fuck for the buck, a diverse cast worth checking out, and enough replay value to keep your hands busy with a level of humor often missing in most porn; making this one worth a rating of Recommended. As Robby would say, "you'll have a lot of fun with it" and I appreciated the references to the review since they showed Robby can take it as well as dish it out.

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You can email me with questions at Houstondon @ hotmail.com if you have any constructive criticism of the review too. :) Also you can follow me on twitter @HoustonDon



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