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Fine Ass Bitches 4


Studio: DVSX » Review by Disco Dirge » Review Date: 6/1/06



XCritic's Advice: Recommended

Genre: Straight Feature
Director: Bobby Manila
Cast:: Kelsey Michaels, Samantha Ryan, Eva Angelina, Michelle Maylene, Candy Mason, Cassie Young, Kurt Lockwood, Brad Baldwin, Lee Stone, Andrew Andretti, Talon, Tommy Gunn, Richard Kline
Length: 150 mins
Production Date: 2005

Audio/Visual:
In a Nutshell - Glorified Gonzo with Generally Good Lighting
As with many adult movies made today, cinematic ideals are the last thing on anyone's mind. The main goal is to capture the copulation, and make sure you properly frame up the money shot. Beyond that, delusions of artistic grandeur are left for Michael Ninn, and maybe Brad Armstrong. Bobby Manila obviously agrees with these point-and-shoot sentiments. The image here is a generic 1.33:1 presentation, with the action always perfectly centered. Sure, Manila moves the camera around, tilting the lens to offer that always aesthetically pleasing music video style. Fleshtones are fine, as are the contrasts. While the sets scream someone's borrowed apartment, this is still a decent looking XXX title.

Extras:
In a Nutshell - A Decent if Derivative Selection
There is something that DSVX needs to learn about making hardcore porn DVDs. Giving us 13 mins of interviews, six standard solo scenes (about three mins each) and the other basics that belong on a smut disc does not a fantastic amount of added features make. Indeed, most of the material here is average at best. The solo segments are just gals flicking their bic, while the Q&As tend to revolve around the same old who/what/when/where/why or how these ladies got into the business. What we could really use here is a bonus scene, or maybe a more detailed behind the scenes featurette. With what is available, there is not a lot of value for your vice dollar.

First Impressions:
Fine Ass Bitches 4 promises to be a celebration of the derriere. It positions itself to glorify the glutteous and ballyhoo the butt. Yet once we've seen these gals sans slacks, the ass antics are all but forgotten. Indeed, Bobby Manila's sit-upon shell game is obvious from the first few frames. Sure, these gals give us glimpses of their dumpers, but we never get the full on rump worship we really want. Instead, we get a collection of decent funky onions and that's it. No languishing lube jobs, no up close glimpses of the rancid rosebud Just cabaret, and then canoodling. And even worse, there is limited anal action here. How can a title that touts tushy not be givin' up the butt every couple of minutes? It seems antithetical to the reasons for this hinder based hardcore.

The Sex Scenes:
For Mr. Manilla, every scene must start the same. He features the gal in bra and panties, he lets the camera linger as they dance and dive. Then his lens moves in the minute they bare their body. The result is close-ups of nipples and vagina, belly and mouth. Once the man enters, it's all business. Clothes are removed, positions are proffered, and pops occur where they can make the biggest XXX impression. While not mechanical, the sex here is rather staid. Everyone tries to amplify the Eros with slapping and tugging, but the truth is that arousal only comes from couples that have obvious chemistry. That only happens in half the scenes here.

Scene 1: Michelle Maylene, Tommy Gunn

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Acts Performed: Cabaret, Kissing, Foreplay, Butt Oiling, Salad Tossing, Blowjob, Ball Action, Reverse Cowgirl, Spoon, Mish, Pile Driver, Cunnilingus, Doggy, $hot in Mouth
Score: 3 out of 5
Aside from a single sequence where Tommy takes out some lotion and butters up Ms. Maylene's posterior, there is very little overt ass love here. Luckily, the passion between the performers more than makes up for the lack of butt sex. Michelle really seems to respond to Tommy, and there are times when you feel as if the pair is lost in their supposedly faked fucking. Our lead actress is rather loud, screaming her delight in ear piercing decibels, while Tommy can occasionally fall into mundane meat puppet mode. Overall, this is the best scene on the DVD, a clear case of onset screwing leading to interpersonal delights. Too bad the rest of the action couldn't be this authentic.

Scene 2: Samantha Ryan, Kurt Lockwood
Acts Performed: Cabaret, Kissing, Foreplay, Salad Tossing, Blowjob, Reverse Cowgirl, Cowgirl, Anal Fingering, V to M, Doggy, Mish, $hot in Vagina, Cream Pie
Score: 2.5 out of 5
That tattooed love boy Kurt Lockwood shows up to give Samantha a good going over. It's really too bad then that the little lady really isn't worth it. She's not the most attractive performer in this set, and her suck and fuck style is sloppy at best. Yet both actors make the most of the scene, trying to liven it up with sultry looks and erotic body language. What elevates the scoring here is the last minute decision for a cream pie as the money shot. Seeing a man cum inside a girl for once is a relatively rare pleasure (outside of titles that specialize in that kind of thing). Kurt delivers a dozy and Sam shows us the thick, milky results.

Scene 3: Candy Mason, Richard Kline
Acts Performed: Cabaret, Blindfold Fu, Foreplay, Lap Dance, Fingering, V to M, Blowjob, Ball Action, Cunnilingus, Mish, Reverse Cowgirl, V to M, Face Fucking, Cowgirl, Spoon, $hot in Mouth
Score: 2 out of 5
Candy Mason is a fake titted tart who looks uncomfortable in her skin. This is important to note because we are reviewing the elements of arousal here, not just how hot the cockknocking is. Partnered up with probable suitcase pimp Richard Kline (although a certain Kevin O'Neal is listed on the DVD cover), this is an absolutely dreadful scene. You can tell that the duo are obviously faking at times, over acting and shamelessly mugging for the camera. Since most porn directors today don't watch for such obvious pandering, Manila is as much to blame as his performers. By the end of the scene, we are sick of seeing Candy mash up her over-inflated breasts and moaning for the lens like she's never had dick before. Though there is some ferocious action here, it doesn't really add up to a great bit of gratuity.

Scene 4: Cassie Young, Talon
Acts Performed: Cabaret, Foreplay, Shoe Fu, Cunnilingus, Blowjob, Cowgirl, V to M, Reverse Cowgirl, Doggy, Mish, $hot on Chest
Score: 2 out of 5
Talon can usually be counted on to deliver the drilling, but here he seems to be phoning it in. Cassie looks lost in many of the moments, lunching on log like she's bored and preoccupied. As they move along, bouncing from position to position, we become less and less interested. Eventually, our toothsome talent pops and it's pretty pathetic. Aside from the substandard sex of the next sequence, this is one of the worst scenes in the entire film.

Scene 5: Kelsey Michaels, Brad Baldwin, Andre Andretti
Acts Performed: Cabaret, El Santo Fu, Dueling Blowjobs, Ball Sucking, Reverse Cowgirl, Mish, Cowgirl, Doggy, Spoon, $hot to Face
Score: 1.5 out of 5
A few questions before we start - what's with the Mexican wrestler masks? Why do the men never take them off? Who thought that Kelsey's non-existent tits made for a steamy skin queen? And why was she chosen to do two guys without a single DP shot? It's quandaries like these that can really fuck up your hardcore porn. Ms. Michael's 12 year old boy body is just not the Dirge's cup of tit-less tea, and having the meat puppets dress up like El Santo is just the stupidest idea ever. The action is ordinary - Kelsey takes it in the snatch while some guy stuffs cock in her craw. Lather, rinse, repeat. After the previous paltry performance by Cassie and Talon, this one-two punch almost dooms this DVD.

Scene 6: Eva Angelina, Lee Stone
Acts Performed: Cabaret, Foreplay, Salad Tossing, Ass Slapping, Ass Oiling, Blowjob, Cowgirl, Standing Cowgirl, Mish, Pile Driver, Spoon, Reverse Cowgirl, V to M, Doggy, Tit Slapping, $hot to Face and Mouth
Score: 2.5 out of 5
Leave it to our eyeglass wearing wench and Mr. Bendy Boner to almost save the day. Stone is one of the more mannered muscle men in the biz, and he really can't do much except flex and fuck. Thankfully, that's all Ms. Angelina wants. She goes ga-ga for his gonads, and before long, they are pounding away like lifelong lovers. The sex actually gets more exciting as the scene moves along, and once we get to the determined doggy, we are ready for the release. While it doesn't actually free Fine Ass Bitches 4 from the depths of despair it had found itself mired in, this is still an excellent example of erotica.

Disco Dirge Peter Meter Rating: 2.5 out of 5 (Recommended
Cohabitation Certification: Questionable
Again, it's just a matter of adding up the scores. Scenes 1, 2 and 6 deliver while 3, 4 and 5 suck shark bait. With a 50/50 breakdown overall, it's a critic's call. Honestly, the Dirge found more here to like than loathe, but a couple of the performers really tested that truism. Though it's not the greatest selection of sex scenes offered (Heck, it's not even the best DVD DVSX has put out), it still provides some decent diddling. Therefore, Fine Ass Bitches 4 earns a less than rousing Recommended. As for the couples conundrum, The Dirge can offer this word of advice. Unless your partner is a total prude, they will more than likely enjoy this uneven erotica. Overall, these "Bitches" may be fine, but their asses don't get the lovin' that we would like.





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