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Carmen's Dirty Secrets

Studio: Adam & Eve » Review by Colonel Mustard » Review Date: 7/17/06

XCritic's Advice: Skip It

Genre: All Sex

Director: Nick Orleans

Length: One Hour 56 minutes, not including extras

Cast: Taryn Thomas, Domino, Tori Lane, Carmen Luvana & Kelly Tyler

Body of Review: If you don't know who Carmen Luvana is by now, you haven't been paying attention. She's a sultry vixen, who might be one of the most attractive women in porn today. This DVD is a video collection of some of Carmen's deepest darkest desires. This DVD features five scenes featuring a range of sexual intercourse between various participants.

Scene 1: Taryn Thomas
Lovely Taryn Tomas is the leadoff chick in this film. She's wearing a lowcut mini skirt, but oops, happened to forget her panties. She crawls on all fours showing off her right ass and bald labia. Taryn is a natural bodied looker with dark hair, and a lusting for sex. She's paired with three hired dicks. She starts by getting both dicks well oiled with her own spit and pierced tongue. Much like an elimination match, the first guy blows his wad, leaving only two. The next guys work her snatch and mouth at the same time much to Taryn's delight, as she screams for more. The second guy drops his load on her ass. Then there was only one who gets the esteemed pleasure of nailing Ms. Thomas in the ass before dropping his seed on her stomach. Different scene, very entertaining.

Scene 2: Domino & Carmen Luvana

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Domino is a dark skinned, possibly Hispanic woman with natural breasts, super long dark hair and large round eyes. She's playing the submissive role to Carmen Luvanna, our lovely fake breasted blonde cover girl. After some dirty talk and phone sex, Domino arrives to service Carmen, first by licking her shaven inner folds while standing on a staircase. The roles are reversed, and Carmen wears the wet beard, playing with Domino's snatch and ass. Dildos make their way into the fold, with Domino taking a big pink dildo in the pink and Carmen Luvana getting fucked my Domino sporting a strap-on from behind.

Scene 3: Domino
Domino is back again, this time taking a much more domineering role in the sex. She's dressed to impress, with a dark cocktail dress and jewelry. Her guy is patiently waiting for her to put on the finishing touches on the look. Instead, Domino strips the guy down to show off his package. After some tit play, Domino gets down to business sucking cock and licking balls before taking a ride on the baloney pony with pussy to mouth and a splash of footplay for fun. The scene ends with a show of man seed across her dark skin.

Scene 4: Carmen Luvana
Sexy sultress and cover girl Carmen is up next, wearing a smart business suit, with her giant fake tits putting her jacket buttons to a strength. Underneath, Carmen has a nice pink bra and panty set that looks spectacularly scrumptious. She's with two guys in this scene. Oral portion is energetic with Carmen sucking both guys and taking her turn getting her labia licked. On a sea of single dollar bills is where we get to see Carmen take the penal penetration in her shaved coochie. The first guy has had enough, rips his rubber off and jacks off on Carmen's face. The second guy now takes over to pound that pussy doggy style, before absolutely covering Carmen's darling face.

Scene 5: Kelly Tyler & Tori Lane
Kelly Tyler and Tori Lane are two women wearing perverse black spandex outfits with the crotches cut out. Both are dark haired, and eager to bump pussy to pussy. Oral comes next as the two split time in each other's pussies before the 'sneak attack'. From no where, a guy jumps from no where to nail Tori from behind. Only in porn, ladies and gentlemen. Thankfully, it seems like the new comer is accepted as girls take the pussy pounding and even suck cock right from their friend's vagina. Both girls take it in the ass with taste testing before taking a smathering of ball goo on their chests to end the scene.

Audio/Video: Audio did tend to very a bit from scene to scene. The skin tones on this DVD, especially in some of the scenes, gave everyone a orange hue. This could have been better.

Extras: This absolute best part of the extras are not one, but two bonus scenes. The first one features the full length 20 minute sexual romp between lovely cover girl Carmen Luvana Austyn Moore and Evan Stone from the Contractor. The second scene, from the 2005 release of Flesh Gallery pits Mia Smiles with Carmen Luvana. The lovely Asian Mia play a hardcore game of slap and tickle in this 18 minutes worth of entertainment. There are also trailers from "Swinging in the USA", "the More the Merrier", "Sex Sells". "Latin Fantasies" "Rawditions" & "Casual Sex" . Also present were tons of advertising for sex lines, and website, along with the standard 13 minute behind the scenes, and photgallery. Excellent set of Extras!

Summary: I need to have to say that my readers need to Skip It. The best sex scenes on this DVD were on the extras menus, which is ever a good thing. Carmen is hot and watching her work in an absolute, and I always enjoy Taryn Thomas, but with the production deficiencies, I didn't think this DVD is even worth a rental. There are much better DVDs out there to spend your hard earned money on.


Colonel Mustard

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