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French Privates

Studio: Male Media One » Review by Poindexter X » Review Date: 5/12/07

XCritic's Advice: Watch It Online

Date of Production:

May 2005


Markus Zane, Samuel Farmer, Marek Scott, Samuel Lukas, Thom Ekbert, Jason Fox, Virgil Gibson.

The Movie:

Randy French soldiers spend more time sucking cock and engaging in butt sex than guarding their forest territory.

The Dudes:

The dudes are appealing with dark hair, a mix of muscular and toned bodies, full and trimmed pubes, and big uncut cocks.

Scene One:

Military Guards Markus Zane (cute with short light brown hair and toned/slender/smooth body) and Marek Scott (good-looking with brown hair, face stubble, and toned/smooth body) are on duty clutching their machine guns when civilian Samuel Farmer (handsome with short dark hair and muscular/smooth body) accidentally enters government property. The guards are pissed off but their anger is short lived when he sinks to his knees and sucks those two hard uncut cocks. He pulls on his own hard unclipped pork while sliding his wet mouth up and down those stiff dongs cramming as much man-meat into his mouth as possible.

Samuel bends over allowing Marek to rub his hard dick against his bum while he sucks Markus off. Marek spreads Samuel's butt cheeks apart exposing his tight shaved asshole in nice close-up. He fucks Samuel from behind (with condom) using fast 'n smooth stokes to glide in and out of that tight butt. Marek's hangy nuts swing back and forth as he porks the civilian. Markus gets a piece of that ass as well fucking Joshua doggy style (with condom). Samuel shoots a large thick load on the ground as Markus cuts loose with ample love juice on Samuel's ass and Marek shooting a thick load on his fist. Nice cum-filled foreskin.

Scene Two:

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Samuel Lukas (good-looking with dark hair and toned/smooth body) is bored standing guard at his post in the woods. He pulls out a gay magazine and begins to leaf though the periodical when fellow soldier Thom Ekbert (cute with short brown hair and toned/smooth body) catches him and freaks out. Back at home base, Thom smokes and cigarette and screams at Samuel. To make amends, Samuel gets on his knees and takes Thom's huge uncut tool into his mouth nursing on the large purple knob, jacking the fat shaft with his fist, and sucking those large plump hairy balls. At least this shuts Thom the fuck up. Thom fucks Samuel in the side/missionary position (with condom) using fast 'n smooth strokes to fill his fellow soldier's tight manhole. The dudes work themselves into a sexual frenzy with Samuel shooting a large wet load on his inside thigh and Thom letting loose with a big thick load on Samuel's outer thigh.

Scene Three:

Jason Fox (handsome with short dark hair and smooth/muscular body) is overcome by heat as he patrols the forest. He yanks off his shirt revealing his sexy smooth muscular chest to cool down. Samuel Lukas (from Scene Two) spots the hunky dude and promptly forgets his own duties in lieu of some possible man-sex. Jason pours a jug of water on his head, which cascades down his body in cheesy slow motion. The dudes make out with plenty of wet tongues as they rub their hard uncut cocks together. Samuel sucks Jason's tool licking his nuts, stroking the stalk, and licking the cock head. Samuel knows how to give a good blowjob while he pulls his hard pud. Jason rubs his stiff dong against his pal's bum and then fucks him fast 'n hard from behind (with condom). Jason cuts loose with a thick load on Samuel's back as Samuel shoots a large thick load on the ground.

Scene Four:

Marek (from Scene One) and Thom (from Scene Two) enjoy some alone time as Thom sucks his pal's large unclipped dong. Cramped in a stone hallway, Thom jacks that big fucker with both hands and nurses the large purple head while fisting his own stiff uncut member. Like clockwork, Marek rubs his cock against Thom's butt and fucks him from behind (with condom). Marek uses fast/hard strokes to fill his friend's tight chute and ends up dumping a thick load on his back. Thom supposedly cums in Marek's mouth but his "load" seems unusually large as it spills out of Marek's mouth. I doubt it is real.

Scene Five:

Thom and Samuel Lukas are locked in a side sixty-nine gorging on each other's hard uncut cocks and full balls. The soldiers believe they are well hidden in a camouflaged tent leading Thom to spread Samuel's butt cheeks exposing his tight shaved starfish. He diddles it with his fingertips. Thom sucks his pal's nuts and finger fucks his butt hole with one digit making him cry out in pleasure. Uptight soldier Virgil Gibson (good-looking with short brown hair and toned/smooth body) catches the dudes and goes ballistic with his ridiculous rantings. Pissed off at being interrupted, the dudes turn the tables on asshole Virgil pointing their machine guns and forcing him to undress and tie his hands behind his back. Virgil is forced to take Thom's big cock down his throat as Samuel fucks him from behind (with condom). Switching up, Thom pounds Virgil's tight hole in the missionary position while being face fucked by Thom. Samuel shoots a large thick load of soldier juice on Virgil's chest in slow motion. Thom cuts loose with a big thick load on Virgil's stomach and Virgil pulls his unclipped pork shooting thick jizz on his chest.



"French Privates" is shot directly on video and presented in full screen. The videography provides full coverage of all the action with plenty of close-ups. The picture quality is clean with a bit of grain from time to time.


The sound is clear allowing the viewer to hear the dudes speak French while talking and yelling at each other. There are plenty of the usual sounds that accompany man-on-man action as the dudes slurp hard dongs and pound tight manholes.


The disc includes an interactive menu, scene selection, and a gallery with some nice action photographs from the movie, and a trailer for "Young and Uncut # 14".

Final Thoughts:

First off, the cover art for "French Privates" boasts two dudes that are not in the movie. Hmmm. Anyway, it's basic porn filled with some appealing guys who look to be enjoying the action and each other. The videography provides full coverage of all the action with plenty of nice close-ups. The camera shots linger on the same action for too long and the scenes move at a snail's pace making the movie monotonous. There is hardly any variety with the fucking as the dudes stick with the same postion during their scenes. That said, the cock sucking is hot and my personal favorite dudes are Thom, Marek, and Samuel Lukas. I'm going with a Rent It for this one due to scenes that lack variety and go on for much too long.

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