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Naked Aces

Studio: Digital Playground » Review by Don Houston » Review Date: 5/17/07

XCritic's Advice: Watch It Online

Naked Aces

Digital Playground

Genre: Vignette

Director: Robby D.

Cast: Shay Jordan, Tommy Gunn, Austin Kincaid, Scott Nails, Kimberly Franklin, Mick Blue, Ryaan Reynolds, Whitney Stevens, Marco Banderas/Duato

Length: 78:28 minutes

Date of Production: 11/18/2006

Extra's: There was only a photogallery, a pop shot compilation from the scenes, a biography for Shay Jordan, as well as a slide show, and 21 trailers for movies such as Pirates 2, Pirates, Jack's Playground 32, Deeper 4, Teagan's Juice, Island Fever 4, Cockasian, Virtual Sex: Teagan Presley, Virtual Sex: Jesse Jane, Virtual Sex: Nikki Hunter, and Virtual Sex: Sophia Santi.

Condoms: None

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Audio/Video Quality: Naked Aces was presented in 1.77:1 anamorphic widescreen color as shot by director Robby D. for release by Digital Playground. The lighting was kind of strange here and that meant that the limited amounts of grain and other visual elements used to lend a sense of texture were minimal (for example, the first scene looked washed out and blurry; others were stripped of colors or purposely shot in such a way as to cause visual confusion). It took me awhile to notice it but there seemed to be a variation in styles as to how the scenes were shot and edited, some of the scenes using a lot more close ups while others relying heavily on slower and pulled back medium shots. I like a change of pace though much of it still struck me as a work in progress, usually not getting in the way of the heat and at other times de-hancing it somewhat. The composition of the shots and the editing enhanced the look of the ladies a little bit but not nearly as much as expected, proving what this critic has to say about the production team led by Robby (including Joey "The Wiz" Pulgadas on editing, music and other aspects of production) with the DVD mastering revealing no compression artifacts (the visual bitrate hovering in the mid to upper 7 Mbps range or so most of the time). The audio was presented in a 5.1 Dolby Digital Surround English (384 Kbps bitrate) with a minimalist leaning that seemed unique in most ways to productions outside of the Jack series, with the vocals always dominating the audio track as I like it.

Body of Review: Robby D. is considered by a number of people to be the creative mind behind most of the projects released by Digital Playground these days but sometimes he gets a bit bizarre. I generally get an "off the record" email about his weirder projects shortly before they arrive, possibly as a form of damage control, possibly just to warn me that something different is headed my way (letting it soak in). Such was the case with Naked Aces, one of the few titles from the company that I didn't get weeks in advance of release, where the theme was gun loving gals in need of their second true love; cock. Each scene offered a comedic look at a goofus guy dressed to invoke a desire to beat him silly and a gal handling various forms of small arm weapons. In some ways, that makes it the perfect title to ship mass quantities of to Texas since so many people here carry guns like the women had. That said, here's a brief glimpse into the scenes of the movie by cast and action, noting that no condoms were used:

Scene One: Shay Jordan, the hotty featured on the center of the front cover in the pink bikini sporting the Mac-10(?; not Uzi's as she claimed) weapon, was up against super ninja Tommy Gunn after she provided some nice tease in her bedroom by seductively eating a hotdog. The comic portions of his jumping around aside, she correctly pointed out the flawed logic of bringing a sword to a gunfight; resulting in her making him eat her hotdog and then pussy. Okay, Shay is the most exotic looking hotty in the company line up these days, her extensive generic background well covered by others in recent times. Her looks alone have not been enough to make her scenes particularly good (for those, see Jesse Jane in action) but when you look that good, most people don't expect you to be very sexually talented. This was probably her most active ride in porn and her dirty talk was solid too, if a bit over the top at times, the bound Tommy drilling her pretty hard and the cutie sucking him off after coating his cock with her own juices. She gave good head and he gave her mouth a small load of population pudding in return. Tommy as Ninja-Boy was funny and the sex, while far too short for jaded porn aficionados like me, was probably her best scene to date.

Scene Two: Austin Kincaid, the brunette on the left hand side of the front cover sporting the Anton Kalashnikov 47 (AK-47), was up next as a gun toting slut in need of teaching "Mullet-Boy" Scott Nails what would happen to him if he kept jerking off to porn without letting her get some action. The lack of fleshtones in the scene and the shimmer off his polyester pants distracted me but her blowjob skills have long been considered very skillful, the gal employing a hand to gland technique to enhance the moment (she can jerk me off anytime she wants to). She rode fairly actively before the facial, the editing jumping around too much for my tastes, although her smile was a nice change of pace for me.

Scene Three: Kimberly Franklin, The brunette on the right hand side of the front cover in the purple bikini, was up next sporting what appeared to be an HK MP-5N (A4 model) as she forced tourist photographer geek Mick Blue to first take her picture and then go down on her. She gave some nice head in exchange, paying special attention to his balls on the cheap bed they ended up on. She aggressively rode his cock and ordered him about as though he were completely whipped as her cookie drained him dry for a titty pop.

Scene Four: Ryaan Reynolds, playing a "bikini slut saving the world one cock at a time", was up next with some rapid styled editing showing her brandishing a variety of firepower, none of it as powerful as the chest she flashed repeatedly. Scott Nails played the hillbilly styled after Mike South himself, missing teeth and acting a few IQ points lower than a geranium (hmmm, maybe he was a souped up version of mike after all), delivering pizza to the badge carrying performer. She wasn't a special order pizza with cum and extra sausage, receiving it in the form of his cock as she dropped to her knees to please. Her blowjob was decent, even if the camera was far too close much of the time to capture the visuals all that well; her moderately active riding style suiting her pussy before he blasted her face with a large load that she enjoyed the taste of.

Scene Five: Whitney Stevens, the busty brunette so many appreciate these days, was up next with a semiautomatic handgun and an M-60 with a bipod mount as she expressed her discontent with Marco Banderas/Duato who played "El Homo" in a role that was obviously intended for a guy named Kurt. She hated the waste of good hard cock and his gold sequined shorts made her even more irritable, the gal holding him at gunpoint to service each other. She roughly blew him, slapping his pecker around as though to establish that she was in charge, eyeing the camera in POV style as she slobbed his knob (her titties bobbing up and down to the rhythm of her head strokes). Her ride was decent as her vaginal passage seemed designed for the dick but as good as it had been going, someone had the not so wonderful idea to have her do anal; substantially slowing down her motion as she called the man various terms derogatory to homosexuals. He busted a nut on her face and she was then up in a short tease session in the bathtub with a bunch of plastic pineapple grenades (the kind you can now find as paperweights since they were so shitty in use decades ago).

Summary: Naked Aces by director Robby D. for release by Digital Playground was probably the weakest release by the company I've seen in a long time with the exception of Shay giving what amounted to her best performance to date sexually. The comedy aspects were cute, especially given how improperly the ladies were holding the weapons (maybe they were each given a DVD of the old "A-Team" series to model after) but clocking in at under 80 minutes with few extras worth noting sure made the rating of Rent It seem generous. The mixed technical qualities and inconsistently heated sex also lowered the stroke and replay value, making Naked Aces low on the fuck for your buck scale. I appreciate that Robby tried something new but even a guy with his talent can drop the ball sometimes and this was one of those rare occasions.

You can email me with questions at Houstondon @ hotmail.com if you have any constructive criticism of the review too. :) Also you can follow me on twitter @HoustonDon

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