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Spankin' Adventures

Studio: Male Media One » Review by Poindexter X » Review Date: 6/21/07

XCritic's Advice: Watch On Demand

Date of Production:

January 2007

The Movie:

Well, the cover art screams: "Hot ass spankin' action! Tightey-Whitey spankin' fun! Spankit, Suckit, Fuckit! Young tight red asses! We all deserve a good spanking sometimes!"

The Cast:

Justin Bicks, John Hutch, Ryan Tames, Jason Banks, Chris Tero.

Safe Sex/Condoms:

Some dudes wear condoms while other's don't.

The Dudes:

These European dudes all have a similar look of short dark hair with a couple of buzz cuts and some stringy bleached hair thrown in for variety. The guys are appealing in sort of a boy-next-door way and all have slender/smooth or average builds. All the cocks are unclipped.

Scene One:

Justin Bricks (cute with short dark hair and tall/slender/smooth body) and his buddy John Hutch (cute with dark hair and tall/slender/smooth body) frantically fool around on an ugly sofa swallowing tongues and filling the room with sounds of heavy breathing. The dudes yank their blue jeans and shirts off and continue their adventures in tight white briefs. John lays across his pal's lap allowing Justin to give him a good old-fashioned open palmed spanking first with Y-Fronts and then without. John's hot bum becomes a nice shade of pink by the time Justin is finished. Justin gets a payback when John paddles his butt with strong palm making his cheeks just as pink. John takes Justin's uncut cock into his mouth jacking the shaft, working the knob, and slobbering up 'n down. Justin fucks John from behind using fast/hard/smooth strokes. He switches to plugging John in the side/missionary position making John's limp unclipped cock and plump nuts slap around. After some missionary position, Justin cums in John's mouth and the thick jizz slides down John's chin and onto his chest. John does not bust a nut.

Scene Two:

-- sponsored by --

John Hutch from scene one is back this time with Ryan Tames (cute with buzz cut and tall/slender/smooth build). The dudes get to know each other much better on that same damn ugly sofa with some heavy kissing and exploring hands. After stripping down to their white underwear, John makes himself comfortable across Ryan's lap where he proceeds to get a strict open-palm spanking that makes his li'l bum bright pink. Not wanting to miss out on the delights of "punishment", John slaps Ryan's bum with the same open-handed spanking making his pal's bum glow. John sucks Ryan's big unclipped tool giving some good head and rubbing his nuts. Ryan screws John from behind fast 'n hard filling his tight man-chute with Grade A uncut schlong. Ryan follows the basic guideline of gay smut by switching to the side/missionary position pounding that ass and then changes to the traditional missionary position. Ryan shoots a large thick load in John's pie-hole leading to a lovely cum-filled foreskin and love juice oozing down John's chin. Again, John does not cum. I wonder if he has blue balls?

Scene Three:

Jason Banks (cute with short dark hair and toned/lightly hairy body) and his pal Chris Tero (cute with short brown hair and slender/smooth build) get down on the sofa (I'll bet it's that same one with a different blanket covering) with wet tongues. After pulling off their clothing except for the tightey-whiteys, Chris assumes the position on Jason's lap and receives the now familiar open-handed spank. Chris chows down on Jason's uncut dong and frankly; he needs a few lessons on how to suck a good cock. Jason fucks Chris doggy style using smooth/long/full strokes to fill his friend's tunnel of love. Not wanting to be adventurous, Jason turns to the side/missionary position continuing to pork his pal while Chris pouts like a bratty schoolgirl and sucks his index finger. Chris's cock is limp throughout the entire scene. After some missionary-style banging, Jason cuts loose with some jizz on Chris's chest. Chris does not cum.

Scene Four:

Yeah! Another scene that's an exact copy of the three before! This is where the cast names run out so I'll be making up my own. Jack (cute with short dark hair and toned/smooth/tanned body) and Micah (nice-looking with longish bleached hair and average build) are guess what? Yes! On that same fucking sofa kissing, licking tongues, and feeling each other up. It would not take a famous psychic to the stars like Jackie Stallone to know what will happen next. The dudes get down to their white briefs and Micah dutifully lays across Jack's lap for a copycat open-palmed spanking making his bum nice 'n pink. Jack's in the mood to have his butt smacked and Micah is happy to oblige in the same fashion. Jack gives Micah a blowjob sliding his mouth up 'n down that unclipped shaft and working the ample foreskin. Micah enters Jack's tight bunghole from behind leading to some fast 'n smooth butt sex. Naturally, Micah swings into the side/missionary position as plows Jack's hole while his limp uncut cock flops around. Yawn. At least Jack has a nice plump tool and balls. Micah shoots a thick load of juice in Jack's mouth with some making it down to his shaved pubes. Jack does not reach a climax.

Scene Five:

Okay guys, we are finally into the home stretch of this mediocre offering of light spanking smut. George (cute with brown buzz cut and slender/smooth body) and his friend Max (cute with short black hair and average build) shed their duds down to the white briefs and assume the position. George receives a spanking that actually adds a little something new by kneading those hot buns with his hands. George gets in on the spanking making Max's butt rosy pink. George goes to town on Max's unclipped pork cramming it down his gullet and allowing Max to fuck his mouth. I must say that George definitely knows his way around a rigid cock. Max plows George doggy style using smooth 'n urgent humping. Of course there's the old standby of the side/missionary position where George's limp uncut prick flops. Hold what you got! There's actually something "new" presented here! George rides Max's stiff business for a nice li'l game of sink/bounce. Max shoots a large load on George's face and tongue. Hot load!



Shane Furley's Spanking Adventures is shot directly on high definition video and presented in widescreen. The videography is descent providing full coverage of the spanking, cock sucking, and butt sex. The picture quality is sharp and clean.


The Dolby Digital sound is clear but there's nothing in the movie to warrant this high-class sound. The only music is in the menu and the rest of the movie simply has the same heavy breathing and panting common to all fuck flicks. Well, there are the sharp sounds of slapping hands on bare bums.


The disc includes an interactive menu with some techno ditties, scene selection, chapter stops, fetish menu, cumshot recap, a gallery of photos, and trailers for: "Sloppy Endings", "Swap My Pop", and "Sloppy Endings 2".

Final Thoughts:

If I could hand out awards for the most repetitious and mind-numbing movies, this one would win a large horseshoe bouquet. The five scenes are completely interchangeable since they follow the exact same action: make out, strip, spank, suck, fuck. After the third scene I was looking at my watch (the last time I did this during a movie was while watching "Forest Gump"). The dudes look like they would rather be somewhere else and could not care less. Limp dicks and missing cum shots abound. On the positive side, the dudes are at least appealing with big uncut cocks; the videography while not great at least provides coverage of the action. Lastly, the picture quality is top-of-the-line. Since the movie is clearly not bad enough for a skip it, I'll recommend a Rental for fans of cute European guys with unclipped cocks who are curious about some light spanking.

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