Genre: Big Tit Feature Director: Tushna Cast:: Brandy Dean, Christine Allure, Tara Moon, Latia Lopez, Daphne Rosen, Summer Sinn Length: 135 mins Production Date: 2006
Audio/Visual: In a Nutshell - Harsh and Not Very Nuanced
Whoever was in charge of lighting for the entire Busty Pussycats in Heat production should be fired - or at least be filmed under the same unflattering circumstances he or she created. The 1.33:1 image is overly bright, and incredibly flat. It makes skintones look sickly instead of sexy, and amplifies the many occlusions and body issues our performers have. The Dirge wouldn't be surprised if several of the cast members balked upon seeing the final transfer. It is a cinematic shame.
Extras: In a Nutshell - Some Intriguing Added Elements
Along with the typical retail shtick - phone sex ads, website info, trailers, galleries - we do get a few entertaining added features. There is some deleted footage (including more shots of pile driver and the like), a behind the scene interview (in which Summer Sinn spills all) and a weird backstage option where you can see Christine Allure doing a decent striptease. These are definitely not your run of the mill bonus features.
Large breasts are, perhaps, the most symbolic visual predicator of sexual proclivity ever devised by horny men. Seeing a lady with big boobs usually signals to the testosterone set a kind of lustful appetite that typically has nothing to do with a woman's real desire for diddling. But in an industry that will use any and all elements to highlight their hardcore, the mega-tit title has become a solid bestseller. Of course, there's a clear dichotomy between the films that feature real knockers, and those that present gals who've given themselves an extreme makeover - mounds edition. The six Score Girls featured here all appear scientifically augmented (Ms. Lopez may be the only naughty naturalist, but it's hard to tell), and in general, their new chest accessories are pure plastic. They sit on their torsos like halved hard cantaloupes, and barely move during the various positional play. If you like 'em immobile and rock solid, this is the title for you. If you want your bosom more bouncy and less behaving, head on over to the natural nakedness aisle. You won't be finding any biological flesh bags here.
The Sex Scenes:
Since the purpose of this porn is to focus on lumbering lady lumps, director Tushna makes sure we get lots of scenes where tit fucking and tit play are paramount. Unfortunately, this allows us to glimpse the various scars and other surgical theater war wounds worn by these babes. In addition, the meat puppets are never identified, and in some cases, are never shown from the stomach up. For anyone who enjoys the male element of a gal/guy equation, this will be a big disappointment. Finally, the faces made by many of these actresses indicate a level of discomfort that really undermines the erotic enjoyment of their scenes. Nothing destroys the mood faster than a look of pained impertinence on your partner's puss.
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Scene 1:Brandy Dean Acts Performed:Blowjob, Hand Job, Tit Fucking, Mish, Spoon, Pile Driver, $hot on Tits Score:2 out of 5
Starting us off with a decent scene, Brandy puts on her best phone sex voice and pretends to be begging for a booty call before her paid paramour walks onto the set. She obviously enjoys whatever this anonymous performer is providing, because she gives good sonic suggestion. Granted, her decision to continue talking into the receiver is ridiculous after a while, but we still feel the heat between the pair. Too bad the rest of Busty Pussycats in Heat won't be as good as this sequence. Instead, we end up experiencing less and less eros as the time drags on.
Scene 2:Christine Allure Acts Performed:Tit Sucking, Boobly Oobly, Blowjob, Tit Fucking, Reverse Cowgirl, Spoon, Mish, $hot on Tits Score:1.5 out of 5
Frankly, Ms. Allure has none. Her breasts are awful, nipples practically pointing straight up on her overstuffed ta-tas. The play acting premise at the beginning (Christine picks up some pud at a bar) is laughable, and once they get into the bedroom, the ennui expressed by the duo is destructive. We never once sense a connection, and the perfunctory positions feel superficial and plain. The rocketing rollercoaster effect one experiences here is mind blowing. Scene 1 was perfectly fine. Scene 2 was like a visit from the Salt Peter patrol. Ugh!
Scene 3:Tara Moon Acts Performed:Blowjob, Ball Sucking, Tea Bagging, Tit Fucking, Mish, Spoon, Cowgirl, Doggy, Anal Spoon, $hot on Chest Score:1.5 out of 5
Miss Moon is the most visible practitioner of personal discomfort on the entire DVD, and it may have something to do with who she's matched with. Talon is a mighty large lad, and he's more aggressive than most. Still, he's not pounding Tara like chop meat, so her looks of displeasure and disgust are hard to read. Either she really wants nothing to do with this actor, or she's not used to having her immobile saline sacks manhandled so. While providing a passage for her partner's penis, she's distant. Even the most worked up watcher will have difficulty maintaining firmness during the course of this crappy sequence.
Scene 4:Latia Lopez Acts Performed:Blowjob, Ball Sucking, Tit Fucking, Doggy, Boobly Oobly, Cowgirl, Mish, $hot on Tits Score:2 out of 5
Leave it to a hot Hispanic honey to turn things around, if ever so slightly. Ms. Lopez is a question mark in the titty department. She either has a really good boob job, or some oddly shaped natural jugs. Like the scene before, we start out with our performers in mid-BJ, and the sudden shift into sex without any cabaret or foreplay is disquieting. We get into the groove soon enough, and Latia responds by really ratcheting up the heat. She's not quite connecting with the dick she's doing, but in one of the rare cases over the course of this entire DVD, she doesn't appear to care. She's having her own good time, and we're lucky she's allowing us to watch.
Scene 5:Daphne Rosen Acts Performed:Feather Duster Fu, Blowjob, Tit Fucking, Reverse Cowgirl, Doggy, Anal Cowgirl, Anal Mish, $hot on Tits Score:1.5 out of 5
Back to the fuck and suck doldrums as Ms. Rosen plays baffled chambermaid to some dude's naked nonexistence. She blows his wang. He works her womb. We're done. While the anal angle is appreciated, and we don't have to suffer through a lot of pre-porn bullspit, the truth is that Daphne fails to convince us of her XXX prowess. She's a real stiff in the sack, and not in a good way. Instead, we find ourselves waiting around for the inevitable spunk to trunk transfer. A real snooze fest.
Scene 6:Summer Sinn Acts Performed:Tit Sucking, Face Sitting, Tit Fucking, 69, Blowjob, Reverse Cowgirl, Mish, Doggy, Spoon, $hot on Tits Score:1.5 out of 5
All you Summer Sinn fans, please take note. The Dirge is not among your number. There is nothing arousing about this gal's gignormous, manmade mammaries, and for those of you who enjoy her doctor determined dimensions, more power to you. Since Tushna keeps the lens locked on her lumbering lungs, the rest of the action is ruled unimportant. It doesn't matter actually. Whoever she's partnered with is mediocre at best, and the majority of the movement is designed to showcase the star's swinging sacks.
Disco Dirge Peter Meter Rating:2 out of 5 (Rent It) Cohabitation Certification:Granted
Your level of enjoyment here will be based solely on how much you enjoy fake tits. If you love them, you'll definitely get off on this title. It doesn't represent the greatest assortment of plasticine puppies in the entire porn industry, but these inflated items will do the trick. If you prefer the more natural brand of boobage, Busty Pussycats in Heat will leave you high and very, very dry. Providing a rating of Rent It allows both sides to satisfactorily sample Score's wares without wasting large sums of scratch. Couples looking for some onscreen loving to supplement their sex life will have no problems with this DVD. Therefore a Cohabitation Certification is easily rewarded. In truth, it really does all boil down to a matter of taste - fake vs. found, artificial vs. agreeable. And in true XXX fashion, the answer is left up to the individual. In this case, The Dirge was not impressed.