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MILF School 5


Studio: Club Jenna » Review by Disco Dirge » Review Date: 11/3/07



XCritic's Advice: Recommended

Genre: MILF Feature/Gonzo
Director: Steve Rogers
Cast: Lake Russell, Christina Skye, Missy Vonage, Savanna James, Liz Taylor, J-Mac, Justin Young, Da Captain (Adam)
Length: 119 min
Production Date: 2007 

Audio/Visual:
In a Nutshell – Not Bad for a ‘Catch and Grab’ Production
This camcorder creation, frequently whiting out when the brightness of the Florida sun hits the lens (this is a Miami based production), runs the gamut from good to goofy during the course of each sequence. Rogers has a good eye for composition, and some of his set-ups really rate highly on the risqué meter. Still, there is a small amount of grain and some color issues in the 1.33:1 full screen image. They don’t distract from the diddling, but they don’t add to the atmosphere either. As for sound, the Dolby Digital Stereo mix offers limited aural pleasures. We can barely hear the talent as an internal microphone dynamic has been employed to capture the chatter. They could be discussing the meaning of life for all we know and we can’t discern what they’re saying.

Extras:
In a Nutshell – Unexceptional and Basically Bare Bones
Unless you think trailers, galleries, and website information is the high end of added content, there is nothing much of value offered as bonus features. One expects more from Club Jenna, even if this is a glorified gonzo outing.

Condoms: No

 



First Impressions:

Where did the whole “MILF” idea come from? Naturally, one assumes it derives from the standard adult entertainment ideal – if one genre works, the opposite must be waiting to do so as well. If a ‘barely legal’ title with girls looking like 14 year old boys brings the bucks in, giving their legal guardian a go must be some manner of given hardcore cash grab. True, modern smut relies on the demographically specific/fetish oriented concept to make its mark, but with rare exceptions, seeing someone over the age of 40 straddling a giant sized penis is perplexing, not pleasant. It boils the entire XXX idea down to attractiveness and agility. So when judging MILF School 5, one has to move beyond the wildly acrobatic and frequently out of control industry fashion standards. Instead, we are gauging how comely our proposed parent really is, and what she can do with a guy that’s half her age. For the most part, these Mothers I’d Like to Fuck do a fine job of selling the smut.   
 
The Sex Scenes:

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First, let’s break the ‘caught in the act’ ruse right now. Two of the women here admit to being professionals. Missy claims a career in porn, and Liz is a swinger who also hints at a life fucking for the camera. So anyone who believes that these older gals are local Miami moms just waiting for some slang spouting studs to show up and drill them for a dollar and a commemorative video of the event are fooling themselves. Aside from the odd way that these ladies give head (it could be the massive meat the puppets are packing), they can clearly handle themselves in positional situations – reverse cowgirl, scissors – that give seasoned vets the shivers. Aside from this fact, the fuck and suck is well done. The men deliver rock hard pounding, and the supposed 30 to 40 somethings sell the sex expertly. The only drawback is a lack of novelty and originality. While director Rogers can change up the camera and angles all he wants, most of the hardcore encounters come across as mechanical and routine – BJ, two or three tries, and we’re out.  

Scene 1: Lake Russell, J-Mac
Acts Performed: Blow Job, Ball Sucking, Reverse Cowgirl, V to M, Doggy, Mish, $hot in Mouth, Oral Clean-up
Score: 2.5out of 5

While each scene doesn’t follow this consistent pattern, Ms. Russell plays pick-up, talked into porking onscreen while seated at a beachside bench. She is very long in the tooth, with a face that apparently indicates a life of being ridden hard and put up wet hundreds of times. While her Australian accent provides a slight amount of exotic intrigue, it’s Lake’s ability to handle J-Mac monster cock that really impresses. When an actress winces while inserting a penis into her supposedly prepared pussy, slowly working it in until she’s comfortable with the girth, you sense something special is about to happen. Sadly, our dick manipulator only knows one speed – call it crazed cunt cramming – and so we wind up with a willing babe treated as nothing more than a set of orifices. It will be an approach that mars much of MILF School 5’s otherwise arousing XXX. 

Scene 2: Christina Skye, Justin Young
Acts Performed: Blow Job, Ball Sucking, Reverse Cowgirl, Spoon, Scissors, Mish, V to M, Doggy, Minor Domination, $hot in Mouth, Oral Clean-up
Score: 3 out of 5

No set-up, just straight to the hotel room and the sex. Blond and equally experienced, Christina gives Justin a nice run for his smut money. This is some powerful porn, made even hotter by the obvious connection between the couple. Mr. Young seems to have that ability with his co-stars (it will occur again with the equally fetching Savanna). This sequence is better than the fourth because we get more positions, more passion, and some arousing implied B&D. Sure, it’s just some minimal choking and arm restraint, but Justin is never overly aggressive and Christina gets a kick out of it. Covered in sweat and clearly getting off on the action, all of these factors help to fuel one of MILF School 5’s best hardcore happenings.

Scene 3: Missy Vonage, Da Captain (Adam)
Acts Performed: Blow Job, Mish, Reverse Cowgirl, V to M, Doggy, $hot in Mouth, Oral Clean-up
Score: 2 out of 5

After a bit of pointless cabaret (no approach and pickup), Missy gets down to business. With balloon-like fake tits, a rather unattractive face, and a demeanor that suggests a professional about to go through the motions (turns out, she is), she makes for a lousy vicarious lay. Da Captain, a decent supplier of shaft, does everything he can to wake this woman up, but the sense of drugged out disconnect is just too prevalent. Once we get to the final two positions though, things improve dramatically. Either Ms. Vonage’s interest level has increased, or her pretend paramour is hitting the right internal sex spots. It’s amazing to watch Missy morph from lox to lover. Whatever the reason for the last act transformation, we get some decided steam and a nice facial finish. 

Scene 4: Savanna James, Justin Young
Acts Performed: Blow Job, Ball Sucking, Mish, V to M, Doggy, Pile Driver, $hot to Face and Mouth
Score:2.5out of 5

Again, our leading lady is seated at an outdoor café when she agrees to participate in this Pro-Am porn experience. Pushing the definition of MILF to an unreasonable extreme (Savanna looks 25, not quite the MATURE perspective the DVD promises), Justin steps up and knocks another nookie scene right out of the park. When they finally start fucking, the sparks really fly. Ms. James seems more than satisfied and our lumber jacker couldn’t be happier. So why the less than impressive score, you may ask? Well, look at the action listed above. Three positions are not enough to warrant a higher rating. Had this couple really tied one on, sexually speaking, we’d have wound up with a hardcore highlight. As it stands, this is still as sizzling as MILF School 5 tends to get. 

Scene 5:Liz Taylor, Da Captain (Adam)
Acts Performed: Blow Job, Mish, Pile Driver, V to M, Cowgirl, Doggy, $hot to Face
Score:2out of 5

Liz is just plain irritating. We practically hear her whole life story as she sits shotgun and blabs on about her experiences as a swinger and her proto-porn experiences. If it weren’t for the overlong introduction, we’d have a much better scene on our hands. But the reason for all the yakking is clear once the slamming starts. Da Captain is only going to give us a few firm positions before popping his cork, and Ms. Taylor seems more than happy for the truncated trouncing. She’s more into the posing than the pounding, metaphysically concerned on how she comes across on camera rather than simply laying back and getting balled. After the above-average action we’ve seen before, this last sequence is a palpable letdown. 

Disco Dirge Peter Meter Rating: 2.5 out of 5 (Recommended)
Cohabitation Certification: Granted

Though it probably won’t satisfy devotees hoping for actual mature MILF action, Club Jenna can be proud of this ersatz-gonzo glory holing. Easily earning a Recommended rating,MILF School 5 provides expert erotica without too much of the bullshit bravado that routinely ruins these ‘pick-up and plow’ productions. The fuck and suck is uniformly hot, and the actresses portraying “older” objects of desire are, for the most part, acceptable XXX honeys. While the guys featured may give partners some understandable penis envy, the action here is perfect for couples. Therefore, a Cohabitation Certification is easily awarded. While the allure of such titles will remain a mystery – at least with the middle aged Dirge – there is obviously a call for such Mrs. Robinson style action. In a genre that could easily go goofy, or grotesque, at the drop of an age bracket, Steve Rogers and his gang of mack daddy meat puppets provide some interesting Eros. The appeal may be as limited as the action, but overall, this is a hearty hardcore title.




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