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Active Duty Live Christmas

Studio: Dirty Bird Pictures » Review by Poindexter X » Review Date: 12/16/07

XCritic's Advice: Skip It

Year of Production:

December 2005

The Movie:

Straight military dudes get drunk, smoke an endless supply of cigarettes, and show off their cocks during a booze-fuled Christmas party.

Run time:

2 Hours

The Dudes:

The dudes are all appealing with a mix of short black, brown, and blond hair; muscular, husky, and toned bodies; full, trimmed, and shaved pubes; and cut cocks.

Disc One:

A group of straight military dudes have gathered together to celebrate Christmas by throwing down as many beers ‘n cocktails and smoke as many cigarettes as humanly possible in two hours. All the dudes are appealing wearing tight black boxer briefs and bow ties. Some of the standouts here are Chas with short blond hair and a toned/smooth body who claims to be a “pimp daddy, bitch” (insert eye rolling here); Luke who is a good-looking dude with a dark buzz cut, husky/muscular body, pierced nipples, and tattoos; a cutie named Dean with short brown hair and toned/lightly hairy body who is wearing an elf costume; identical twins with brown buzz cuts and toned/smooth bodies, and Colin who is wearing a black sock cap and has a toned/smooth body.

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The dudes quickly get fucked up slinging back those beers and cocktails becoming rowdy, clumsy, and smoking like chimneys while a cute dude named Daddy-O plays a sentimental rendition of “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus” on the piano as the guys slur along. The dudes open plenty of gifts sent in from their website fans and get some cool stuff: clothes, I Pods, and even a red butt plug! One goofy guy named Donnie is quite cute with short brown hair and a toned/smooth body wears Christmas wrapping bows like the pasties of some demented showgirl. He pops one of the buttons on his black g-string showing off his trimmed brown pubes, plump nuts, and cut cock. This is one hour of nonsense with just a few quick flashes of cut cocks. I found Disc One to be a waste of my time.

Disc Two:

With Disc Two, the party continues as Todd (handsome with short dark buzz cut, husky/muscular body), Dean (Elf Dude), and cute blond Chas slouch on the sofa stroking their hard cut tools while Donnie (still wearing the “pasties”) sits on the floor jacking his stiff clipped member. The camera is stagnant staying in the same position with no close-ups. The dudes are obviously feeling no pain from all the booze and they laugh, tease each other, and sing off key (although the piano player hits plenty of sour notes as well). Donnie sings a quick but full-throttled “It’s beginning to look a lot like Dickmas” as he plays with his big cock. There is some quick cock sucking here but with the stationary camera there are no close-ups and the viewer has a hard time seeing exactly what is going on. People walk in front and stand in front of the camera and there is a rather lengthy/useless camera shot of the straight porn these dudes are watching to stay hard while some off screen queen belts out “Hello Dolly”! Ha!

Finally there is a little descent action but frankly, the movie has been so bad up until now, the action does little to save this stinker. Chas beats his meat and shoots a thick load on Dean’s elf hat while shaking the hat’s bells. Donnie (with the “pasties”) busts a thick nut on the floor. Piano player Daddy-O (cute with short brown hair, toned/smooth body) chows down on one of the twins’ hard cut dick sliding his mouth up ‘n down giving some excellent head. Twin repays by chowing down on Daddy-O’s stiff clipped pole and the dudes go back ‘n forth sucking one another’s members. After the twin squirts a wet load, Daddy-O crams an unknown (he’s covering up his face) dude’s fat cut cock down his gullet for a while and then blows Dean’s dong. Dean shoots in Daddy-O’s mouth leading Daddy-O to spit the cum out on Dean’s thigh.



“Active Duty Live Christmas” is shot directly on video and presented in full screen. The videography is crap with mostly stationary shots. When handheld, it’s clumsy but does provide some half way decent shots near the end. The picture quality is sharp.


The sound is fine allowing the viewer to easily hear the dudes as they get drunk as skunks and start slurring their words while the Daddy-O plays Christmas tunes on the piano (occasionally hitting bad notes).


The two-disc set includes an interactive menu, scene selection, and chapter stops. There are no bonus features.

Poindexter’s Roundup:

Sitting through “Active Duty Live Christmas” is like enduring a never-ending videotape of a family member’s Christmas party that you did not attend. This has got to be one of the worst movies I’ve ever had the displeasure of reviewing. No doubt that the dudes are all hot. Too bad their talents are wasted here with two discs of bad camera work and dull goings-on. Frankly, watching a bunch of people getting drunk is not my idea of entertainment. To be fair, near the end there is some descent cock sucking and a couple of cum shots. By this time, it’s too late. The movie is like receiving stale fruit cake from your Aunt Gladys. Skip It.

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