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Jenna's Kitty Caress

Studio: Doc Johnson » Review by Don Houston » Review Date: 2/26/08

XCritic's Advice: Skip It

Jenna Jameson might currently be known for her comments at the 2008 AVN Awards show but her body of work certainly gains her a place in the porn universe as a former queen of the industry for her body of work (mostly as a performer though the projects she contributed to in a behind the scenes fashion also merit some attention). Having sold her company, Club Jenna, to Playboy and dumped her husband, she now has the freedom she wanted to pursue whatever interests she desires. That said, her name will always be associated with the porn industry and her company will always bear her mark to a degree so any product bearing the name will fall into a special category of scrutiny, including sex novelties such as the Jenna’s Kitty Caress vibrator that I had the chance to check out this weekend.

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The vibrator is the thin, pencil shaped device many are familiar with, measuring about 6 inches long and my variation colored “cotton candy” (pink). It was also a thin device, about as thick around as my middle finger which seemed appropriate somehow given the temperament of the toy. It takes two AAA batteries and unscrews at the base, containing an “O” ring that tentatively makes it “water proof” as the advertising states if you are careful in making it a tight seal. My own experience with anything labeled that way is contrary to advertising claims but it seemed secure enough and that was not my problem with the vibrator which I will get into in a moment. The head part was shaped slightly like a scoop and designed for direct clitoral stimulation, looking more like a dental device than a vibrator so you could tell inquiring minds that it is a gum stimulator if you are shy.

The plastic box the Kitty Caress comes in was pretty enough, matching the color scheme of the device, and not garish in presenting a picture of Jenna with her infamous legs spread but merely a silhouette of her instead. The back cover said it like this: “For the ultimate in clitoral stimulation, try Jenna's Kitty Caress. Made with a state of the art material called Velvet Touch. Jenna's Kitty Caress delivers more of natural skin like caress during stimulation or penetration. Jenna's Kitty Caress is also waterproof, ensuring that Jenna's Kitty Caress' multi-speed, push-button control can safely be operated under water. Great for the shower, jacuzzi, or that stretch of white sand beach on your next vacation!” The “velvet touch” material was a code word for “hard plastic” so if you are not a fan of such toys, keep this in mind though the texture felt pretty good to me; my associate on the firing line was in the “I hate hard plastic” camp.

The test itself started off well enough after I placed the batteries inside the device, the small solenoid switch on the bottom almost unnoticeable if you’re not looking for it. There were a few settings that could be obtained by pressing the switch; once to turn it on slow, another time making it faster, etc. I prefer this over the twist method because if I’m working assist on the device, I hate the batteries coming out by mistake (ruining the moment). The problem came in when I turned it off the second time, just before the main event where I tried it out on Nadine (her real name disguised to protect the incredibly guilty). The device simply stopped working altogether. I had not tried the water test (yet) and nothing seemed loose on the vibrator, the batteries were properly placed and brand new (all my current tests use brand new Duracell coppertops or Energizers). Needless to say, this was a total buzz kill for the test. I tried to get it running with a shake or three, lightly tapping it with my hand, and resisted the urge to take Nadine’s advice and chuck it against the concrete floor as hard as I could.

I will attempt to revise this review with a re-test if the nice folks at Club Jenna supply a replacement but this was not the first version they sent (see Salome’s glowing review) but due to a mechanical defect of unknown origin, I feel obligated to rate this one as a Skip It for now; keeping in mind that I might have received the only defective one in existence, though I somehow doubt this being the case. I cannot tell you how long the batteries last but based on extremely limited experience, the device provides a modest little vibration worthy of the name Doc Johnson; though at this writing, the company has a policy of no returns for any reason, including defects, in the State of Texas (perhaps modifying it now that yet another judge has struck down the state’s sex toy law that was virtually never enforced). In any case, there are far more reliable toys and movies from Club Jenna so don’t waste the ~$20 this one would set you back unless you are given a warranty.

You can email me with questions at Houstondon @ hotmail.com if you have any constructive criticism of the review too. :) Also you can follow me on twitter @HoustonDon

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