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Cheap Booze & Cigarettes

Studio: Vivid » Review by Don Houston » Review Date: 3/5/08

XCritic's Advice: Recommended

Lanny Barby!  (click for trailer)

Cheap Booze & Cigarettes

Vivid Entertainment

Nadia Styles and Roxy DeVille!

Genre: Feature

Director: Chuck "Paul Thomas" Lords

Nautica Thorn and Jay Huntington

Cast: Lanny Barby, Evan Stone, Roxy DeVille, Nadia Styles, Marco Banderas, Nautica Thorn, Jay Huntington, Staci Thorn, Abbey Brooks

Length: 96:28 minutes

Lanny Barby, Staci Thorn, and Jay Huntington

Date of Production: 11/18/2006

Abbey Brooks!

Extra's: Most of you will appreciate the five unrelated bonus scenes from past movies that totaled a whopping 110:16 minutes long. I described most of them below and it didn't hurt that some of them were favorites of mine. There were also trailers to shows like 40 Inch Plus, Brand New Faces 4, Team Squirt, Voluptuous; a text biography for lovely contract hotty Lanny Barby, a photogallery, some spam (including commercials at the front of the DVD), and a 12:37 minute long Behind the Scenes by Dizzy feature that was a lot of fun to enjoy.

Condoms: None

Audio/Video Quality: Cheap Booze & Cigarettes was presented in anamorphic widescreen color using a 1.78:1 ratio offering as shot by director Chuck "Paul Thomas" Lords for Vivid Entertainment. Like some of his more noteworthy titles of late, this one was shot in HD in 1080i, so being presented in the SD format will make a difference if it is ever upgraded to high definition. The lighting was reasonably well handled (with minor exceptions in a few of the scenes that had less lighting and appeared overly saturated), limiting the grain, video noise, and other distracting flaws seen all too often in porn these days; appearing to be shot nicely by talented cameraman Ralph Parfait. The composition of the camera angles and lighting were not always optimal this time, the camera spending too little time in the first scene and too long on some of the later establishing shots. The fleshtones were usually accurate this time and the DVD mastering was well done, making it look pretty solid in terms of visual quality (though perhaps the compression ratio was set too high as the bitrate was averaging about 4.5 Mbps). The audio was presented in a 2.0 Dolby Digital offering (at 192 Kbps) with the vocals sounding flat and the music pretty decent thanks to Miles Long. For some reason, the levels were mixed lower than usual but aside from the added background noise from doing so; the dynamic range was average and the separation of the vocal tracks nonexistent.

-- sponsored by --

Body of Review: Lanny Barby has been one of my favorite contract gals at Vivid Entertainment for some time now, her beautiful eyes, curvy figure, and gonzo attitude all combining to make her something special in my eyes. While I strongly prefer her body of work with director B. Skow, she has made some decent scenes with Chuck "Paul Thomas" Lords too, her latest movie by the guy being Cheap Booze & Cigarettes. The movie is a modestly budgeted feature that uses Paul's unique method of telling a story, two stories actually, about low life's and how they deal with problems by getting drunk and laid. I'll admit that I hate scenes edited together and prefer a straightforward approach to plotted porn but given that Lanny was so prominently featured in the movie, I figured that I'd give it a chance and I was not sorry. The back cover says it like this: "Two tales of drunks, ex-cons and henpecked husbands...all down on their luck, and finding their only pleasure in nasty, zipless sex. In "Anywhere But My Bed," our hero finds he can only get turned on in his apartment building elevator. Try as she might, his buxom wife is unable to lure him into bed. Instead he is drawn to stalk, seduce and fuck strange women in between floors. Going up? In "The Big Shot," Evan Stone plays a former felon who finds himself cheated on a bill in a local coffee house. The owner takes him for a fool, short-changing his change. Evan seeks counsel from a whore in a local flophouse. After fucking her silly, he fucks up the coffee jerk, and then fucks his girl to boot. Six girls. Two anals. Two three-ways. And Lanny Barby. Being down on your luck doesn't get any better." If that sounds good to you, here's a brief glimpse into the scenes by cast and action, noting that no condoms were worn:

Scene One: Motel Passion: Lanny Barby, the hotty featured on the front cover, was up first having pissed off the mighty Evan Stone after he was ripped off. She went to the bed to masturbate in hopes of him joining her, Lanny eventually having to walk over to him so they could both orally satiate the other. Her blowjob was great and he liked eating her cook, the face sitting only making it even better before they began to screw like horned up teenagers on Prom Night. The scene was interrupted by the following scene (scene two) but picked back up after awhile as the couple vaginally boned on the bed. This was not Lanny's most active ride but she looked great and seemed to appreciate all that Evan was doing for her, resulting in his load of population pudding going to her mouth and titties. Yum!

Scene Two: Kitchen Heat: Roxy DeVille, a streetwise brunette with a nice figure and winning attitude, was up next with cute Nadia Styles and studly Marco Banderas, in the laundry room at the diner. Roxy and Marcos kissed and she started in on him but swapped places with Nadia so she could kneel down to provide the guy with a very energetic hummer. The two gals played a little as the scene cut back and forth with the first one, bugging me a whole lot in the process. The ladies licked each other as well as his cock, both getting some quality riding time on Marco's rod while sharing the guy as best they could; each actively participating in the scene. Nadia was the more active at vaginal penetration but Roxy gave a fine display of pleasure too. Roxy even took a short break to masturbate while enjoying Nadia's ride, the anal portion of which was nearly as active and showed a degree of passion I have come to expect from her. The ending facial went to Roxy's mouth for cumswapping and Evan joined them for an oral grudge fuck where they blew him a little.

Scene Three: The Shaft: Nautica Thorn, a frisky cutie that looked all slutted up, was up next in the industrial section of a rundown building where she was spotted by muscular Jay Huntington. He had been getting bitched at by his main squeeze and left to find some relief before going crazy, finding Nautica the perfect person to share some quality time with. They kissed, she stroked his cock, and then she dropped to her knees to please him orally with a lot of weird noises while giving him a messy hummer. She was enthusiastic and had a look in her eyes that said she had a need for seed, working him increasingly actively until her took over by boning her vaginally and eating her out as well. Her flexibility was tested and the noises she made while enjoying his antics added to the pleasure of the scene, only the limited lighting holding it back for me. The scene finished up with a mouth pop that suitably covered her face as well, Jay's fantasy ending with Abbey's continual stream of whining waking him up.

Scene Four: Elevator Fantasy: Lanny Barby and Staci Thorn were up next over at the brick warehouse where Jay Huntington was looking for love. Nautica left the situation in good hands as her two friends took charge of his needs really well. They were all over Jay with their hands and tongues; blowing him passionately and allowing Lanny to sit on his face. Lanny also got the first dibs on the cock inside of her cookie, Staci massaging her as Jay drilled away to balls deep levels. Staci was active with the cock in her ass (maybe more than when it was tapping her pussy) but the soft focus aside, Lanny won out in terms of the quality of the entire package. Jay popped on Lanny, who then shared it with Staci, the trio covered in sweat before the scene finished up.

Scene Five: Wifely Striptease: Abbey Brooks, a plus sized blond that could affectionately be said to be built for comfort over speed, was up last in the form of a solo tease scene where she masturbated seductively in the crappy dive. She even used a red jelly dildo to get off with but it was only partially a scene by the standards many people have set for a porno. Still, if you like unconventional additions to a fuck flick, this was not a bad bit to toss in.

Bonus Scene: Breakup Sex: Nautica Thorn, an exotic cutie with a nice body and appealing blonde newcomer Heidi Mayne, were up next with bitchy Nick Manning in the house. Nautica was throwing Nick out and they were busy dividing up their porn and other articles while Heidi masturbated to the home porno the couple had made in their better days. Their arguing ended up in the only true example of "breakup sex" of the whole movie (at least the clearest case of it by far), with Heidi joining in on the living room couch as the trio got busy. They did some moderate oral on each other and the gals took turns riding his dick; Heidi surprising me by her active pumping style when on top of him. I loved watching her fleshy ass cheeks ripple as she drove herself down on him, her vaginal work better than her anal by a wide margin. Nautica was fine too but she added more in the way of ear candy and some generic screwing, the ending taking form in the way of Heidi's mouth but it was so minimal a pop shot that I figured they missed most of it with the camera.

Bonus Scene: Burnt Fury: Lanny Barby, the incredibly hot contract gal featured on the front cover, was up next in a skimpy black outfit (much like the one in the mainstream hit, Pretty Woman, worn by Julia Roberts) in a blonde wig. Her partners were Jay Lassiter and Jay Huntington, each of them taking turns with her mouth and pussy on the couch as she showed her aptitude for heated hijinks. To see this gal sucking cock is a treat and the guys seemed to like warming up her box manually before they started boning her hardcore style. She was an active lay, enhancing the levels of energy and passion substantially as she worked them over; the main reason why I picked up a copy. Given the dialogue before the scene, I thought there would be anal and a lot of DP footage but this wasn't the case as they stuck with her sweet little pussy during the ride, one popping on her lower abdomen and the other on her face with some post coital sucking. Whew!

Bonus Scene: Debbie Does Dallas...Again: Staci Thorne, a curvy blonde with a decidedly nasty streak, was up next with nasty Marty Romano in the cheesy little bedroom. He paddled her, screamed at her, and even dripped hot wax from a candle on her as she masturbated, leading to her blowing him and sitting on his face as he ate her out in return. He choked her when drilling her cookie, the gal actively riding his cock in her ass (thankfully for her, he was one of the smallest guys available that day and not a challenge for her anal skills). The rock music background was suitable for them and be busted a nut on her abdomen, Stefani's incorporeal body calling him a "hillbilly piece of shit" as though his initials were M.S., leading to another major plot point.

Bonus Scene: Off the Hook: Nadia Styles, an exceptionally cute brunette, was up next in a sun dress as she knocked on the isolated cabin door of Brian Surewood's shack. She was lost and tired after a long day of stripping, blathering on about her boyfriend troubles in a funny manner while frustrated Brian went nuts with desire for her. He pounced on her and played on her fears about the unfaithful guy, enhancing his line by going down on her sweet pussy as he convinced her that she should get back at him by screwing every guy she meets for free (including him). She was verbally responsive to his touch, the mountain man look of his fitting perfectly into the scenario as he released his pent up frustrations, her fine ass looking awesome as he pulled her thong up the crack between her cheeks. She was an energetic cocksucker in return, showing a flair for giving head and a titty fuck before they started to bone like hormone crazed teenagers. They screwed vaginal in a few positions but she was most active when riding his cock in her ass, bouncing on it while making those little moans of hers. The heated scene finished with a facial, Brian coating Nadia's face with a healthy load of glaze from the looks of it. Yow!

Summary: Cheap Booze & Cigarettes by director Chuck "Paul Thomas" Lords for Vivid Entertainment might not have been the best use of hotty Lanny Barby but as weird as the plotted elements might have been and as painful as the lighting was, some of the sexual energy and heat was enough to elevate the rating to a respectable Recommended. I can almost always guess when one of Paul's movies isn't up to standards; as that's when he trots out his directing alias, but he also uses it to explore a variety of experimental techniques that sometimes pan out so I can't be too harsh on the guy. In short, Cheap Booze & Cigarettes may not have achieved everything it set out to do but fans of Lanny and the rest of the ladies will likely appreciate all it did offer; a decent level of strokability and replay for raincoaters to enjoy.


You can email me with questions at Houstondon @ hotmail.com if you have any constructive criticism of the review too. :) Also you can follow me on twitter @HoustonDon

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