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Secretary's Day

Studio: Smash Pictures » Review by Michael Vega » Review Date: 4/21/08

XCritic's Advice: Watch It Online

genre. Gonzo
director. Zak Wylde
cast. Jordana James. Alektra Blue. Tory Lane. Lindsay Meadows. Samantha Sin. James Dean.
Mr. Pete. Steve Holmes. Talon. Erik Everhard. Pat Myne. Mark Wood.
length. WITH storyline 2hrs 8min, withOUT storyline 2hrs min
production date. July 28, August 5-7, 17, 2006

the audio & video

Video was shot in a 1.33:1 full-frame ratio and the picture was very sharp and shot on video | Audio was clear and presented in Dolby Digital 2.0 stereo


Behind the Scenes [11m 29s featurette] | Photo Gallery | Bonus Movie [Smash Pictures tells you to slap the DVD into your PC and it'll connect to their site and let you watch "Cheating Houswives" in its entirety. I don't like installing strange things on my computer (especially porn), but I gave it a try. I wasn't able to get it to work. ] | Smash Trailers for "Cheating Housewives #3", "Whale Tale" and "White Wife Black Cock #6" | Website Info [standard website ad]

the fucking

-- sponsored by --

Erik starts the action by nibbling on Jordana's ass and titties, before dropping his pants to let her suck his dick. She bends over a nearby conference table for doggystyle, before taking a cowgirl ride. Missionary on the conference table is followed by more doggystyle and reverse cowgirl (along with PTM in between). There's also some more doggystyle, until Erik drops a shot right between her Jordana's ass cheeks.

I don't think Jordana did a bad job during this scene, but I wish she spent more time bent over because her ass looked very sexy in that lingerie.

[ Jordana James. Erik Everhard. | Oral (F). Vaginal. PTM. | Reverse Cowgirl. Missionary. Doggystyle. Cowgirl. | Condoms: Yep |]

Alektra is sitting at her desk moaning and groaning. The fella who's responsible for the "story" comes in ranting and raving about wanting Alektra to get him something, so Alektra stands up to get it and we see Pat come out from under the desk. Ah ha! So that's what was going on! Anyways, she sits on the desk to let Pat continues where he left off and, after he gives her pussy a good licking, she hops off the desk to kneel down and suck his dick. The penetratin' starts with Alektra bending over for doggystyle, followed by missionary and anal bow & arrow. Anal reverse cowgirl leads to Alektra stroking a shot on her tongue.

Meh. While the action wasn't bad, I wasn't feeling Alektra. She did put on a good show, though.

[ Alektra Blue. Pat Myne. | Oral (M/F). Vaginal. Anal. | Missionary. Doggystyle. Reverse Cowgirl. Bow & Arrow. | Condom?: Nope. |]

As Steve and Talon were busy unloading some boxes, Tory watches them with a lusty eye and wandering hands. Once the fellas notice, it's not too long before they're stripping off her clothes and she's sucking their dicks. Steve licks her pussy, before she bends over to let Talon fuck her from behind as she sucks on Steve's dick. Next, Tory saddles up for anal reverse cowgirl that eventually gets turned into a double penetration. Anal bow & arrow with Talon is followed by some more double penetration, until the fellas drop messy shots on her face to end the scene.

Tory's one aggressive chick who works up quite the sweat. That said, there wasn't too much else about this scene that impressed me.

[ Tory Lane. Steve Holmes. Talon. | Oral (M/F). Vaginal. Anal. Double Penetration. | Doggystyle. Reverse Cowgirl. Bow & Arrow. | Condom?: Nope. |]

After bringing Mark a refreshment, Lindsay lets him give her a back massage. It's not long before he's massaging more than her back, as he makes his way to her tits and pussy. She drops her hair, her skirt and her underwear, before dropping to her knees to start sucking his dick. Lindsay saddles up for cowgirl, regular and reverse, and while she's riding cowgirl, she teases Mark by only stroking the top of his dick (something I like to see - and get off on in real life). After some PTM, she bends over to get fucked doggystyle, followed by missionary, until he unloads a shot on her tongue and chin to end the scene.

Not bad. As I mentioned in the recap, I love the thing she did when she was riding cowgirl, and she wisely kept on her "Eva Angelina™" glasses. This scene would've been better if Lindsay had some more meat on her bones.

[ Lindsay Meadows. Mark Wood. | Oral (F). Vaginal. Anal | Reverse Cowgirl. Missionary. | Condoms: Yep |]

After receiving an invitation from Sammy - in the form of her photocopied pussy - James and Pete meet her in the conference room and start groping her. She strips off some clothes and kneels down to suck their dicks, before bending over to let Pete fuck her doggystyle. Bow & arrow with James is next, followed by more doggystyle and a spooning with Pete. There's some anal action as Jimmy spoons her ass, while Pete stuffs her mouth. However, she spreads her legs wider to let Pete turn the anal action with Jim into a double penetration. After some more doggystyle with Pete, this time in her ass, she straddles James for cowgirl - that Pete quickly turns into another DP - until the fellas bust their nuts on her face to end the scene.

Thankfully, this is the final scene on the disc. It wasn't all bad, but most scenes were like this one for me - uninvolving and uninspired. Sure, I liked Sammy photocopying her cootch and handing it out like a party favor, but there wasn't much else.

[ Samantha Sin. James Dean. Mr. Pete. | Oral (F). Vaginal. Anal. Double Penetration. Facial. | Doggystyle. Bow & Arrow. Spoon. Cowgirl. | Condom?: Nope. |]
the final word

While this wasn't the worst disc i've seen in my career, this was one of the most boring. In fact, after selecting play, you're given the option to play the feature "with story line" or "wall to wall sex". Since I always pick "wall to wall sex", during the second viewing (yes, I viewed it more than once) I decided to check it out with the story. All that is added is eight minutes of some dude flailing his arms about shouting like a madman.

And people wonder why I like my smut withOUT story, thank you very much.

Still, this flick had problems long before I made that discovery. I'm going to recommend you Rent It, but if you hate it - don't blame me.

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