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Ass Parade 16

Studio: Bang Bros » Review by Don Houston » Review Date: 5/14/08

XCritic's Advice: Recommended

Dana DeArmond and Jezebelle Bond's fine ass

Ass Parade 16

Bang Bros

Alexis Texas!

Genre: Gonzo, Internet

Director: Preston Parker

Brianna Love!

Cast: Dana DeArmond, Jezebelle Bond, Alexis Texas, Johnny, Brianna Love, Joey Ray, Isabella, Preston Parker, Ms. Goddess

Length: 27:50, 26:57, 27:10, 27:55, and 27:10 minutes


Dates of Production: 4/27/2006, 9/25/2007, 10/29/2007, 11/9/2007, 1/4/2008

Ms. Goddess

Extras: The one true extra I cared about was a short, 2:54 minute long Behind the Scenes set of clips with some of the cast playing around. It was too short to add much value but starting off with Alexis Texas is always a smart move. There were some trailers and a photogallery, as well as a paper sheet inside the case for other recent releases by the company.

Condoms: Some

Audio/Video Quality: Ass Parade 16 was presented in the same 1.33:1 ratio full frame color it was shot in by directors Preston Parker & Dirty Sanchez for release by Bang Bros on their website, and then on this DVD. One of the trademark issues the scenes shot for this series have are that the technical values always seem on the low side, as if consumers of the website will shrug off any problems as being "good enough" for porn, but the occasional POV nature of the effort was handled fairly well. The lighting tended to be whatever ambient light was available, resulting in grain, shadows, and video noise as frequent visitors to the scenes released by the company. This impacts the accuracy of the fleshtones and can be an issue if you care as much about the technical aspects of your porn as I do. That said, the five scenes here varied more than a little bit in terms of picture quality but the general quality wasn't as bad as some of the company's previous works, skating by on the energy factor provided by the performers, most of whom are established professionals (not the amateurs others claim highlight the series). The composition of the shots and the editing all served to provide a mixed bag too but this time showing some extra care given by the editor that made it more enjoyable. Still, it was better then a lot of his earlier work and the ladies had fun so I was largely forgiving of the mistakes observed; the bitrate hovering in the mid 3 Mbps area most of the time. The audio was presented in a 2.0 Dolby Digital English in 192 Kbps, with the vocals on the really low end at times but not covered by droning music except for the very beginning of the scenes and some wind noise in the best two scenes bugged me.

-- sponsored by --

Body of Review: Bang Bros is one of the most successful internet porn companies in existence, largely because they hit the scene at the right time, with the right attitude, and gave fans what they wanted thanks to directors such as Preston Parker & Dirty Sanchez. In a day and age when anything successful brings in hordes of low cost imitators, the company has evolved to "keep it real", offering a variety of genres on the company website. Just as more production companies seek to capture some of the success of the internet magnates, the reverse is also true with the Bang Bros compiling some of their best scenes for release on DVD. One of my favorite series of theirs now comes out with Ass Parade 16, providing a series of gals with big booties to appeal to ass lovers like myself, the best of the batch here a toss up between Brianna Love and Alexis Texas; two of the cutest ladies ever to grace a booty fuck flick as far as I'm concerned. Here's a brief look at the scenes by cast and action, noting that condoms were used once for those still interested:

Scene One: Dana DeArmond, a gonzo gal long before she hitched her fate to the precarious "alt-porn" wagon, showed that women with a few extra years under their belt and a few dozen cheeseburgers worth of fat are still welcome in porn, gracing the small screen in a appearance with now retired Jezebelle Bond in the first scene. The ladies provided a wealth of tease footage on the hotel room bed, some showering fun (love the lathering!), and showed that long before Dana took herself so seriously, she gave some pretty decent scenes. Jezebelle was having a great time too, both ladies practically dripping at the thought of getting paid to fuck in room 149. Preston chatted up Dana, never commenting that she looked like a tranny (a belief that I do not share with the masses), before getting that impressive shower footage, one of the series usual mopes joining them to lick Jezebelle's ass with Dana. Jezebelle was having the most fun and Dana was strictly performing for the camera, the booty shaking by both gals adding some stroke value at least as much as the blowjob tag team action the gals gave. Wrapping their lips around cock was second nature, Dana preferring sweaty balls in her mouth instead, several positions used by the trio for the pounding penetrations that included Dana opening her back door wide for anal action. It wasn't Dana's most active anal ride by the way but Jezebelle showed him a good warm up before the scene ended with his population pudding going mostly to Dana's face.

Scene Two: Alexis Texas, a cute blond with a curvy ass, was up next as she met Preston in the parking lot as she teased in her loose green top and tight blue jeans. The public parking lot was a great place for her to flash him, the gal showing her "nails" as well as her nipples before climbing into the SUV. Her ass was great in the jeans, her thong sticking out as she gave a show while the car traveled along the streets. Preston took her to the rooftop where the tease continued after that, a guy named Johnny being the lucky bastard to sample her lovely wares. Alexis did not do anal here (she hasn't done it at all to date; at least on camera) but she gave a fine hummer and one of her best (most active) vaginal rides of her career as she bounced on cock with a degree of passion. Alexis also gave some thought to the dirty talk she provided, going beyond mere grunts and groans to elevate the nature of the scene; the positioning on the air vents and such looking decidedly uncomfortable but still providing the added thrill of potentially being caught. Alexis was not at her largest in terms of her curves but she had a healthy amount of baby fat that worked really well for her, the mouthful of semen finishing up the scene a bit too quickly as the edit should have let them continue. Whew!

Scene Three: Brianna Love, the other cute highlight of the show, was up next as she stripped off her clothing on the public staircase inside the building they were in. Preston fingered her perfect pucker and she crawled as her neon pink thong was lowered to give a great view. The wind noise on the roof was a pain at times but I can't deny that the view of her ass was really hot as she went through some wardrobe changes. Joey Ray was the mope working with her that day, the aging lothario impressed with her fleshy backside before she dropped to her knees to give an aggressive blowjob. Brianna took her time before vaginally riding the rod, even moving into doing anal with an equal level of passion. Brianna on top of the cock this time was a sight to see, the gal providing less baby talk or moaning than usual but impaling herself soundly to drain his balls dry of their resulting load. Sweet!

Scene Four: Isabella, the curvy Latina seen on the front cover, was up next and while I was surprised that the last two ladies were not the lead cover gals here, having seen them on scores of covers made me think that someone wanted to offer a different look to get fans buying this one. Isabella was first teasing by a green painted iron fence in public, her blue jeans and neon green thong pulled down to give a hot view of her goodies. The cover really did not do her justice in terms of showcasing her ass but the outdoor tease ended too soon since the impatient driver of the car must have seen something heading their way. The good news was that Isabella carried on with more tease inside the home after a wardrobe change, her thick body looking great as the camera continually zoomed in on her ass. This was one of those times when Preston Parker decided to make it a point of view (POV) scene and I have to admit that he did a good job with her. The action was strictly a blowjob and vaginal plowing in a few positions but she was most active when on top of him, adding in some Spanish speaking to make the scene better before the facial flew out. Given the quantity of spew, Preston must have taken a vacation of sorts, though he did wear a condom for those who care.

Scene Five: Ms. Goddess, a gal with lightened hair and huge nipples, looked to be the youngest of the ladies in the movie, also the least physically appealing to me until she showed how she rated a position in a booty movie. Granted, she had to bend over to make it look as big as some of her peers in the flick but she gave director Dirty a nice bit of eye candy to appreciate as she slobbed him knob (the guy weirdly commenting how her ass looked like a nut sack). She was no stranger to a cock in her mouth, the fluid manner in which she inhaled him so readily impressing me more than her admittedly fair vaginal ride. I thought she got into the sex by the end of the scene, even doing anal that hurt her as her partner's cock head turned a nasty shade of pink along the way. If she was cuter, I'd have liked the movie more but her distain for anal weakened the scenes as well. The nut was rubbed out to her face by the end of the scene for those that care, semen spilling down her face onto the floor.

Summary: Ass Parade 16 by Bang Bros courtesy of directors Preston Parker & Dirty Sanchez was not the best fuck flick in the series that I've had the privilege to review but it had some solid stroke material and replay value that could have been elevated to a rating a step up from the Recommended I ultimately gave it if better extras or a few of the scenes had been better. Still, the asses on parade were all rounded and ripe so no one will argue you didn't get your money's worth this time. In short, Ass Parade 16 was best at showing off the talents of ladies like Alexis Texas and Brianna Love but if you truly appreciate bountiful booties, give this one a careful study.


You can email me with questions at Houstondon @ hotmail.com if you have any constructive criticism of the review too. :) Also you can follow me on twitter @HoustonDon

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