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Elastic Assholes #6

Studio: Jules Jordan Video » Review by Don Houston » Review Date: 7/2/08

XCritic's Advice: Recommended

Dana DeArmond (click for trailer)

Elastic Assholes 6: Special Edition

Jules Jordan Video/Mike John Productions

Sarah Twain

Genre: Gonzo

Director: Mike John

Adrianna Nicole

Cast: Dana DeArmond, Steve Holmes, Adrianna Nicole, Sean Michaels, Sarah Twain, Erik Everhard, Robert Rosenberg, Britney Stevens, Velicity Von, Alexandra Joy, Cindy Crawford

Britney Stevens

Length: 236:33 minutes

Velicity Von!

Date of Production: 3/10/2008 (box); 4/10/2008 (credits)

Alexandra Joy

Extras: The best extras were on the second disc of the set, specifically the 25:32 minute long Behind the Scenes feature. The cast was shown having more sex and there was more nudity but the best material was the humor that came from the cast, even stuck up Dana who must have left her diva hat at home. Granted, it was less strokable than straightforward sex but it did add entertainment value all the same. Then there was a pop shot recap, a nice slipcover, a cast list (the entire cast this time), a photogallery, and trailers to six of Mike's other titles, including stuff like Praise the Load, Sperm Receptacles 3, Boobaholics Anonymous 3, No Cum Dodging Allowed 8, Peep Show, POV Pervert 9, Semen Sippers 6, Racial Tension 2, Elastic Assholes 5, Sperm Overload, and POV Pervert 8.

Cindy Crawford

Condoms: None

-- sponsored by --

Audio/Video Quality: Elastic Assholes 6 was presented in a non-anamorphic letterboxed widescreen as originally shot by director Mike John for distribution by Jules Jordan Video using the MPEG-2 codec routine for standard definition releases. The lighting was presented in a very pleasing manner that lit up the action in the scenes very well, limiting the grain and video noise a lot, and I appreciate that the anamorphic processing was employed. There were a few scenes where things weren't quite as good but that was almost certainly due to the skill level of the talent given Mike's manner of coaxing out fine performances from almost everyone but the same could be said of the lighting that wasn't always perfect either (Tim Von Swine assisting a lot too). So, in the scenes where the lighting was flat and stronger; the picture was good and the minor tint or other issues were decidedly not worth worrying about. The grain and video noise were both better than usual; marking a positive visual improvement by Mike that was complimented by the compositional work he offered up that repeatedly enhanced the look of the cast. There were no noticed compression artifacts (the bitrate hovered around mid 5 Mbps so it still looked really good in most cases) and while the picture wasn't the best gonzo I've seen from the director, it was close (the technical matters never hampered the heat in the slightest; always adding to the scenes in fact). The audio was presented in a 2.0 Dolby Digital English offering in 192 Kbps bitrate and 48 kHz sampling rate that had some separation in terms of the vocals (there was some potential to do more here too but I'm not greedy with improvements). The dynamic range was also kind of generic, an area that seemed slightly better than previous efforts and an area that Mike could easily improve to make best use of the great many home theatres in the hands of porn fans everywhere.

Body of Review: Mike John is one of the best gonzo directors according to those who know such things, my own experiences with his material quite favorable for the most part, especially now that he is distributed by industry leader Jules Jordan Video. Having seen such a large portion of his credited works, I was sent a slightly older title to check out, a title by the name of Elastic Assholes 6: Special Edition. Having seen three of the previous volumes of the series in the past, I figured his track record was such that he would provide another set of scenes fans could appreciate, there being seven this time for those keeping track. The theme of the day was anal sex and all the ladies opened up their backsides for inspection by tongues and cocks, the truth in advertising level quite high this time for those of you into anal action. Here's a brief look at the scenes by cast and action, noting that no condoms were used for those still interested:

Scene One: Dana DeArmond, the brunette displayed on the upper left hand corner of the front cover, was up first and those that are familiar with her career in porn, know she flirts with being the Matron of Alt-Porn as much as she makes her bread and butter in gonzo scenes that typically include anal sex. Rather than start with tease or a warm up, the show immediately provided Dana getting played with by a guy close to her own age, Steve Holmes (kidding!). They kissed as he molested her and she was masturbating through her shorts as a result. He ate her and she ate him back, Dana sucking his asshole and balls as if particularly attracted to them this time. Dana was a passive vaginal fuck this time, making faces and acting as though she were in pain; responding slightly better to the anal once she was warmed up by the guy. Once she was on top of him, she mechanically impaled herself on the guy, not showing any chemistry but giving her money's worth all the same. Steve bounced between the holes in the scene but she stopped being an active part of the action earlier, receiving his load to her mouth for swallowing as if that were her sole goal in the scene.

Scene Two: Adrianna Nicole, the curvy blond on the middle of the right hand side of the cover, was up next and as a fan of the young lady, I can say that she rarely lets me down. She spoke with Mike on the couch while in her lingerie, clearly adoring the guy and her career path, soon revving up her engine to really shine. Adrianna's tease was fun and playful, using her breasts and fine ass to capture my attention, Sean Michaels joining her to orally service the lady's backside. Her milky white skin contrasted starkly with his darker features, adding a visual appeal as he massaged her fleshy mounds. As he pulled out his cock, Adrianna eyed it with a gleam in her eye, sucking him actively and aggressively to show her need for seed. Sean had already begun spreading her ass with his hand, and fingering her pussy, Adrianna moving to ride him as a result right afterwards. There was no doubt in my mind that she liked him a lot and she loved his big black cock in her tight white ass, the gal even playing the rusty trombone to please him (sucking his asshole as she jerked him off). It was a very heated scene as a result and much better than the opener, Sean rubbing out the load of population pudding to her mouth for swallowing happily. Yum!

Scene Three: Sarah Twain, a gal not lucky enough to make it on the front cover, was up next and if you like skinny brunette foreign chicks, she will appeal to you. She was cleaning in her undies when cigar smoking trio Erik Everhard, Robert Rosenberg, and Steve Holmes, gave her something else to clean; their pipes. She blew them as she crawled between them, Erik slipping up behind her to kiss her ass a little to coax her into caring more. Sarah was a decent cock sucker and clearly was not new to doing so, looking up at the camera while working the guys over orally that she naturally seemed to progress into the vaginal and anal sex. Sarah was most active when on top of the guys, taking two cocks in her mouth at a time with ease but not looking happy when airtight (a cock in her mouth, pussy, and ass at the same time). They boned her like they owned her and this resulted in Sarah looking much like a glazed donut, her oral always the best part of her act for the folks at home.

Scene Four: Britney Stevens, the gal with the ample sample of an ass featured on the lower right hand corner, was up as the last scene of the first disc, her newly lightened hair looking good out by the pool in her blue metallic bikini. Britney has developed a following and much of that is built on her girl next door dynamic, her nice curves and positive attitude working in her favor during this scene with Steve Holmes. She looked best in the sunlight and her oiling up routine was sweet; Steve assisting her like a gentleman. They began going down on each other outside, even screwing vaginally, but were freer to do more inside the house on the couch. Steve pounded her ass, hammering away as he stomped his foot on her head. She begged him for more and ate his ass when given a chance to do some ATM, deep throating Steve before actively riding him (and offering up a steady stream of dirty talk along the way). Steve really hammered away but she enjoyed it, the man old enough to be her father working her over like crazy on the brown couch. They kissed and went back to anal, Steve pouring out the semen in no time to the receptive gal (who sucked him clean). Great!

Scene Five: Velicity Von, the curvy blond seen on the lower left hand corner of the front cover, was up as the first scene of the second disc; the lady wearing a tight black bathing suit by the pool as she teased with an emphasis on her sweet ass. She looked like she just rolled out of bed and this slutty look worked well for her under the sun's natural light, Mike talking to her about the construction crew nearby as they laughed about whose work was better. Velicity played with her titties and the skimpy suit did little to hold her in, the oil and ass tease adding immeasurably to the appeal of her scene before she went inside to the couch to continue with Steve Holmes. He felt her up as they kissed, establishing at least a little chemistry before he ate her out, paying a lot of attention to her perfect pucker. Velicity reciprocated with a knob slobbing and titty fuck but the two started vaginally fucking pretty quickly as though that was their main goal to begin with. Velicity was an active rider and Steve kept going back to kiss her, leading to the anal play advertised in the title that showed she was a decent backdoor gal. Her vocals were somewhat repetitive and she was not very active until riding on top of him, the modest heat generated between them strokable for a time or two. Velicity tossed his salad a bit and serviced his balls as well, her desire to blow him drawing her back as though she had a need for seed. Steve then jerked her off to a wet conclusion, eventually joining her by rubbing out a wad of population pudding to her mouth for swallowing.

Scene Six: Alexandra Joy, a lean brunette not found on the front cover, was up next as she masturbated herself out of her light blue bra & panties, feeling herself up on the puke green couch as Mike caught every nuance of her act. She had beautiful eyes and seemed self conscious when sucking the dicks of Robert Rosenberg and Steve Holmes though; both men going down on her all the same to elevate their personal chemistry. Alexandra was no stranger to a dick in her mouth but she lacked the polish if most regular performers, relying heavily on her looks from what I could tell instead of her skills. The guys did not let her tease for very long and that was a shame since I thought she would be quite good at it, the men getting a lot of head before banging her vaginally and anally to complete the theme of the show. As expected, they also DP'ed her but as passive as she was in most positions, she was even more passive during this level of hardcore action, claiming to like it but her face telling another story. In terms of mechanical energy and enthusiasm, Alexandra did okay here but it was a low point of the show in most ways, ending when she milked them dry orally to swallow.

Scene Seven: Cindy Crawford, the cute gal with multi-colored hair on the center of the top cover, was up last with studly Erik Everhard and Steve Holmes. Cindy gave her rendition of what she liked but the men deferred to Mike (since he was writing the checks). Cindy was smoking a cancer stick and laughing outdoors on the sunny day, the natural lighting looking especially good on her until they all went inside for the sex. Cindy posed a lot for the camera and the guys were frothing at the bit to get some of that sexy flesh; nailing her mouth, pussy, and ass in a number of positions with all of them engaging in oral regularly. Cindy's blowjobs were inspired and passionate, the gal never missing a beat even when getting drilled by the other guy. Erik was the most driven of the men too, lost in his zone as he banged her for all she was worth. Cindy was an active ride throughout the scene too, never lacking in enthusiasm as she pushed back to receive all they had to offer. That made this a great ending scene after the mediocre last one, her love of her own juices leading her to do taste testing frequently. She swallowed their loads to achieve expert status, smiling and giving the guys two thumbs up as she bent over to wiggle goodbye to the camera. Whew!

Summary: Elastic Assholes 6 by director Mike John for Jules Jordan Video certainly had a magnificent amount of fuck for the buck, replay value, and strokability but a few scenes weakened it a little too so I lowered the rating to Recommended. I enjoyed the extras and several of the cast could have keep me enthralled all day long but others were going through the motions so it averaged out as a respectable rating but not as high as some of Mike's other recent works. In short, Elastic Assholes 6: Special Edition was truthfully advertised as having all the ladies doing anal sex and most of you will find the scenes appealing enough, just not the best they could have been.


You can email me with questions at Houstondon @ hotmail.com if you have any constructive criticism of the review too. :) Also you can follow me on twitter @HoustonDon

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