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Punkd Ur Ass 3

Studio: Evolution » Review by Don Houston » Review Date: 7/16/08

XCritic's Advice: Watch It Online

Dahlia Denyle

Punkd Ur Ass #3

Matt Zane Productions/Pleasure Productions

Rhylee Richards

Genre: Comedy

Director: Matt "The Lord" Zane

Victoria Sin

Cast: Dahlia Denyle, Oliver Sanchez, Rhylee Richards, Rick Masters, Mark Zane, Victoria Sin, Scotty Lyons, Roxy Deville
Non sex roles: Matt Zane, Mark Sumo, Jim Wallace

Length: 119:24 minutes

Roxy DeVille!

Date of Production: 3/27/2008

Extra's: The extras were minimal here with the best of them being a 5:54 minute long Behind the Scenes feature. All it had was some flubbed lines and additional non-sex material like the guys mugging for the camera but it did manage to make them look even stupider (if that was humanly possible). There was also a cumshot recap, a photogallery, some trailers, a clip about the contest (without audio) and forced spam.

Condoms: None

-- sponsored by --

Audio/Video Quality: Punkd Ur Ass #3 was presented in the usual 1.33:1 ratio full frame color as shot by director Matt "The Lord" Zane for Pleasure Productions using the standard MPEG-2 video codec. The bitrate was typically hovering around the mid 3 Mbps mark but it varied a lot more than usual and my general impression of the picture was that it looked barely above a home movie. The movie can be broken up into two parts; the stunts and the sex, neither shot optimally but the stunts looking a lot like the MTV show Jackass that it was patterned after. The sex looked more traditionally shot but with plenty of rough edges to it as well but the lighting was strong enough to allow everything to be seen even if the levels of grain, video noise, and compression artifacts were noticeably worse than most releases by the company. The fleshtones were accurate and the composition of the shots a bit shaky but enough to merit a stroke or two. The audio was presented in MPEG 2.0 with a bitrate of 224 Kbps with minimal separation but with a variety of lesser known bands used during the stunts that actually sounded fitting for the action (and during the sex, I could hear the couples going at it, albeit sounding kind of hollow).

Body of Review: Matt "The Lord" Zane is one of the latest directors at Pleasure Productions to add a twist or two to the often generic nature of their releases. More "alt" than most bearing the title at other companies, his works are definitely "in progress" as he combines punkish music with a variety of attempts at creativity, the latest being a parody or homage called Punkd Ur Ass #3, the sequel to Punkd Ur Ass 2. The show sounds a lot like it was trying to copy the Ashton Kutcher show but in reality, it was more like MTV's Jackass where guys do stupid things to display their ability to take pain. In this case, the payoff is more tangible in that the men get to fuck porn babes with the stunts being far easier (no swarms of bees, no drinking horse semen, no getting bonked in the nads, or the like). The cover said it like this: "Will the insanity over hot porn pussy ever end? Watch these horny studs risk life and limb in this new outrageous volume of Punkd Ur Ass 3. You will realize porn star pussy will always make guys do stupid, crazy hit! The Zane brothers return in the most daring, off the wall antics you will ever see in a porn flick. Prepare to witness skydiving for pussy, Sumo wrestling, naked fast food drive-thru, electric dog collar shopping and surprise loads from every angle. All of this just to get laid by hot porn starlets!" While this seems like a lame imitation of Spunk'd The Movie that came out awhile back and was better handled, the series only needs a little more polish to make it work, this time not making it any more than the opening volley a friend reviewed. If that sounds interesting to you, here's a quick look at the scenes by cast and action, noting that no condoms were used:

Scene One: Dahlia Denyle, a skinny, alt-ish redhead, was up first as the prize for Oliver "Sergio" Sanchez if the foreign gentleman will go out in public naked and buy stuff. Seeing as how this has been done, repeatedly I might add, it just didn't have as much kick this time, the minimal humor barely played up as a result. That he was in his car also weakened the dynamic, the running narration by the Zane Brothers not planned out very well either; a convertible being too conservative compared to going into the restaurants in my opinion. Dahlia was then shown on a couch where she told him he deserved the pussy, the guy licking her a bit before she blew him. There was no chemistry and she was lame at pretending to care at all, I've had better performances out of a traffic cop telling me he didn't want to write me a ticket than this. His small package did little to convince me that she could even feel him in her pussy too, nothing about the scene working for me in the slightest. She did rub out his modest wad of population pudding to her face at the end but it was weak.

Scene Two: Ryhlee Richards, the curvy MILF blond bent over on the middle of the left hand side of the cover, was the next reward for Rick Masters if he let the brothers toss him out of an airplane. Mark Zane really wanted to bang her too, the skydiving aspect kind of cool but I could tell by the look of the dive master's face (Jim Wallace) that he was worried about how stupid this one was. While I wouldn't jump out of a perfectly good airplane with a guy strapped to my back (wearing a parachute at least) to bang her, a guy like Rick can't be too picky so at least I understood where he was coming from. Rylee blew him on the way home, road head always a nice way to end a sporting event, some vaginal fucking taking place as they drove down the public roadway. There was no pop shot displayed but when they arrived back at the house, Mark snuck in to get some head and bang her too; leaving the sloppy seconds for Rick to deal with. They moved from the bathroom to the movie memorabilia room to complete the task, each going down on the other and Rylee an active fuck all around (the facial landing mostly on her chest). She was a bitch though as she said that Mark took the prize and she was leaving; Rick ending up "denied" and forced to jerk off to her ass cheeks without any play.

Scene Three: Victoria Sin, the skinny brunette seen on the upper left hand corner of the cover, was up next as the prize for little Scotty Lyons if he wrestled a huge Sumo wrestler weighing about four times the little guy. Scotty got his ass kicked multiple times, Mark stepping up to do better but only slightly; Scotty claiming his prize by getting blown in the car on the way home before the full scene took place back at the house. The sex included him eating her ass, more hummer action, some vaginal and anal until the mechanical bout of boning was done with. In purely technical terms, this was another okay scene with Victoria showing a lot of energy even if there was nothing special between them. The anal led to a facial, the guy taking forever for almost nothing to come out.

Scene Four: Roxy Deville, the brunette featured on the upper right hand side of the front cover, was up last as she became the reward for Mark Zane if he would strap an electric dog collar to his leg and let her electrocute him repeatedly as he shopped in public. Roxy sucks a pretty mean dick but this was another time when my desire to drill her would take back seat to my sense of self preservation; Mark pussying out to take the small one. A number of shocks later and she was in bed with him naked, slobbing his knob aggressively to milk him dry. Given how many times she applied the trigger to his leg, he deserved a full fledged fuck but it was a wonderfully appealing hummer all the same, Roxy cleaning off the semen as she looked up at Matt.

Summary: Punkd Ur Ass #3 by director Matt "The Lord" Zane for Pleasure Productions was a cute change of pace but the sex was hardly stirring and the stunts were about as outrageous as what kids do all the time (sans pussy for the most part). I've seen a number of parodies of this kind of show and the best that actually comes to mind is Spunk'd The Movie (why it wasn't called some derivative of Jackass is beyond me since that was the show being emulated) but like the watered down sex, the stunts might appeal to those of you that believe porn has to be locked into pale imitations of mainstream shows, my personal rating being a generous Rent It. Roxy made the grade easily and even a the others were strokable to an extent, making it fun enough to check out once. In short, Punkd Ur Ass #3 was about as appealing as Punkd Ur Ass 2 but the premise is sound enough that given the right kind of stunts and sexual conduct, it could become a winner for those patient enough to wait while the director "hangs around" and figures it all out.


You can email me with questions at Houstondon @ hotmail.com if you have any constructive criticism of the review too. :) Also you can follow me on twitter @HoustonDon

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