The Sexy Shooter is a neat device in theory. You have a sex toy that any woman or man can use. You stick it in the pussy or ass and squeeze the dick. Out comes some liquid of your choice and away you go. Now, in the privacy of your own home, you can baste your genitals. What an age we live in!
WORKING ITS MAGIC
When we put the Sexy Shooter to work, it didn't quite get the job done. You're going to need a lot of lube to get this awkward design working its coital magic.
Thankfully, you can load the cock with lube and squeeze it inside of you. Because, you're going to need a bucket of goo to make this rough plastic feel get on your inner lips. I swear, what the fuck is wrong with Adam & Eve? Could they have picked a rough plastic to use?
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I know that operating and production costs are an issue in this new economy. But, there's got to be a line drawn somewhere. Don't they test these fake dicks on crash test pussies? There's no excuse for these rough pussies.
MAKING THE DICK SHOOT
The shooter function is a little bizarre.
The box tells you that you can use whatever you want in. Naturally, spit is a no-go. Crazy Glue will only lead to tears. So, we've used lotion and lube to get the gears going. You just load it in through the base and then squirt it out through the penis head. It's all pretty basic. You learned the dynamic in your 5th grade Health Class.
USE WHATEVER YOU WANT
What else would I put in the fake penis than lube?
That question bugged me for a long time after Terra finished with the toy. Naturally, I decided to experiment. When you put Lotion into the device, it squirts. But, it doesn't squirt that fast.
Lube works pretty well. I had a bottle of Astro-Glide and some second-rate shit that one of the big chains sell. That stuff shot out like a realistic load. Naturally, spit doesn't do much. It just leaks out of the tip. I wanted to try more varied liquids, but Terra told me that I couldn't. She had plans on using the device again.
THE FINAL NUMBER
In the end, it's an oddity that I recommend for shits and giggles.
You'll spend an hour laughing at the sheer oddness of the unit. But, then you'll be finding new ways to squirt juices inside of your partner. Once the receiver can get past the roughness of the unkempt plastic, they've got a fun time on their hands. Therefore, I've got to knock it down a few pegs. I recommend it, but with a caveat or two. Don't expect a smooth ride. But, expect to have a decent amount of fun.
First, Skinemax. Then, The Internet. Eventually, I'll fuck the chick from Tron.