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Not Bewitched XXX


Studio: Adam & Eve » Review by Dr. Jay » Review Date: 8/26/09



XCritic's Advice: Recommended

Genre: Feature
Director: Will Ryder
Cast: Aaron Wilcoxxx, Aurora Snow,  Daisy Layne,  Dane Cross,  Eva Angelina,  James Deen,  Jenna Haze,  Kandice Nicole,  Kelly Skyline,  Madison Ivy,  Marli Jane,  Michelle Avanti,  Mike Horner,  Nathan Threat,  Nina Hartley,  Ron Jeremy,  Sasha Gray,  Sunny Lane,  Teagan Presley,  Winter Sky
Length: 02:23
Condoms: None

Synopsis

My good friend and colleague, Don Houston, beat me to the starting gate for Not Bewitched XXX. He watched the movie and wrote and published a superb "XCritic Pick" review of the movie--even before I got a copy of the DVD! Don's review can be found here. Please read his review and then come back to this page so I can add my two cents worth!

OK. You're continuing to read. So I'm assuming you read Don's take on the movie's plot and its seven sex scenes. Good. I won't waste your time telling you any more about the plot.

What I'll add to Don's review is a bit more specifics about the sex scenes and my thoughts about this very funny and very well-made spoof of the classic 1960's sitcom, Bewitched.

In addition, I've posted some photos of the primary stars of Not Bewitched XXX here.

Review

Note to readers: My reviews are provided in two parts. This webpage provides you with an overview of the scene's setup and action as well as my ratings for sex, video, audio, and production values. A separate Word document checklist details the foreplay activities, positions, pops, and features of each scene...as well as the calculation of each scene's ratings. The checklist for Not Bewitched XXX can be downloaded here. You'll need a password. It's drjay2008.

Look for scenes and movies with a 4.5 or higher (A) sex rating and at least 4.0 (B) in video, audio, and production values. Those are my favorite scenes and I'm quite certain that you'll like them, too.

Scene 1
Scene Type: Boy/girl
Performers: Sasha Grey, Aaron Wilcoxxx


Scene: While at work on the morning of Tabitha's first birthday, Darren (Mike Horner) receives a lecture from his boss Larry Tate (James Bartholet, in a non-sex role) about the importance of a new client. During the meeting, Larry forces Darren to check out a new gorgeous--and very "frisky"--model, played by Sasha Grey. After a while, during which a lot of plot unfolds (both at home and at Darren's office) Darren and Larry vacate Darren's office after inviting Sasha and a male model (Aaron Willcoxxx) to "relax" in the office for a while. Of course, everybody understands that "relax" means "fuck." Sasha and Aaron, of course, take complete advantage of the finely appointed office to kiss and caress. Soon, Sasha is leaning back atop Darren's desk while Aaron skillfully eats her tasty pussy as waves of pleasure course through her body. Quickly aroused, Sasha soon aggressively tears off Aaron's pants and gives him a slobbery deep-throat blow/hand job replete with stringers and balls gobbling (this is one of the best blowjobs I've seen this year). As the scene unfolds, Aaron fucks Sasha's pussy at redline speed in mish while she encourages him with wickedly naughty talk. After some deep-throat pussy-to-mouth, Sasha mounts Aaron in reverse cowgirl and, through her powerful and sexy moves, again proves why I chose her has a 2008 Must-See Girl. Sex continues through cowgirl, kneeling doggie (Sasha cums), and mish (Sasha uses wicked language to inflame Aaron's lust so he will fuck her harder: "I'm gonna drain your fuckin' balls and swallow it!"). To conclude the scene, Aaron pumps his load into Sasha's open mouth and onto her pretty face. She then vacuums him dry but, reneging on her word, she spits out his semen. It's such a pity to waste perfectly good sperm. 


Foreplay: Kissing, handjob, fellatio, deep throat, stringers, balls gobbling, cunnilingus, finger-fucking, and tongue fucking
Vaginal Positions: Missionary, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, and kneeling doggie
Anal Positions: None
Girl cums: During kneeling doggie
Pop: Open mouth; she spits it out.
Sex rating: 3.95
Video rating: 4.50
Audio rating: 4.00
Production values rating: 4.50


 Scene 2

Scene Type: Solo masturbation
Performers: Teagan Presley


Scene: Aunt Clara (Eva Angelina) casts a spell on one-year-old Tabitha to see what she's going to look like when she turns 18. Instantly, a very grown up Teagan Presley appears in Tabitha's playpen. Of course, Aunt Clara, being the klutz she is, cannot undo the spell. So, Tabitha remains a precocious teenager until the end of the movie. Interestingly, Tabitha/Teagan speaks perfect English. But, she's quite unaccustomed to her grown-up body. So, after going into her bedroom for a "nap," Tabitha starts to explore her body and, of course, discovers her womanly and very pleasurable vagina and perky tits. As the next few minutes unfold, Teagan takes Tabitha's erotic exploration to untold heights as she masturbates herself through numerous body-shaking orgasms...including several that make her entire body shake. She even twitches her witch nose to create a queen-sized high-powered vibrator to use to fuck herself! I think this is one of the best--if not the best--solo masturbation scenes I've ever witnessed. Enough said. 


Foreplay: Masturbation
Vaginal Positions: Missionary, kneeling doggie
Anal Positions: None
Girl cums: Repeatedly, while masturbating in missionary and kneeling doggie
Pop: NA
Sex rating: 4.30
Video rating: 5.00
Audio rating: 4.50
Production values rating: 4.50


Scene 3

Scene Type: All girl orgy (with some "help" by Ron Jeremy)
Performers: Sunny Lane, Aurora Snow, Daisy Layne, Kandice Nicole, Kelly Skyline, Madison Ivy, Winter Sky, Marli Jane, Ron Jeremy 

 
Scene: During the afternoon of Tabitha's first birthday, Darren's boss Larry stops by for a visit and, once he arrives, he sees party decorations that were "twitched" into being by Samantha's talented nose. He tries to hit on Samantha's mom, Endora (Nina Harley), but is quickly turned into a Chihuahua dog by the furious "witch-in-law." Of course, Tabitha/Teagan thinks the doggie is a birthday present. After a while, Endora relents and turns Larry back into a human who quickly imbibes several "adult beverages." It's a good thing, too, since Dr. Bombay (Ron Jeremy) soon "pops" into the Stevens' home--along with a couple of his harem girls (Aurora Snow and Sunny Lane). Dr. Bombay wants to wish Tabitha a happy birthday...but doesn't see her. Of course, precocious 18-year-old Tabitha introduces herself and, as you might expect, causes boss Larry Tate a great deal of alarm. After Darren takes Larry away for a little "explanation," (thank goodness he's mostly drunk!), Dr. Bombay promises to get help for Tabitha and then pops himself--and his girls--back to his harem where Sunny and Aurora, along with six other girls (Dairy Layne, Kandice Nicole, Kelly Skyline, Madison Ivy, Sinter Sky, and Marli Jane) engage in a no-holes-barred orgy. One of the many highlights of this hot scene involves Aurora Snow and Sunny Lane...Sunny, expertly wielding a strap-on, pounds Aurora's juicy pussy while Aurora fucks back (nice gaping pussy). Another highlight of the scene is newcummer Madison Ivy. What a beautiful blond--and what a gorgeous ass! During the orgy, Madison has several girls lie side-by-side and then proceeds to tongue-fuck their pussies and assholes in round-robin fashion. Sweet! She even briefly gives Sunny's strap-on a blowjob. Yet another highlight involves Sunny: she becomes the center of attention as the other seven girls pleasure her at once with their fingers, tongues, and toys. Believe me, the girls receive lots of pleasure from each other...and most of them cum at least once. Old man Dr. Bombay (Ron Jeremy) watches and masturbates and even gets in on the action by slapping the girls' asses and finger-fucking their pussies.

 
Foreplay: Kissing, tit squeezing, cunnilingus, masturbation, toy play.
Vaginal Positions: Missionary, kneeling, on her side.
Anal Positions: None
Girl cums: Repeatedly, in kneling doggie.
Pop: NA
Sex rating: 4.85
Video rating: 4.00
Audio rating: 4.50

-- sponsored by --

Production values rating: 4.20


Scene 4

Scene Type: Boy/girl
Performers: Jenna Haze, Mike Horner


Scene: Early in the morning after Tabitha's birthday party, Samantha (Jenna Haze) and Darren (Mike Horner) awake and make their bed. Realizing that it's too early for breakfast, they discuss how Jenna misses having a "little one" around and then decide to "practice" making another baby. Mike nuzzles Jenna's neck, kisses her mouth, and, after she removes her robe, caresses her nightie-clad body. Jenna soon begins to "tease" Mike by dropping down her nightgown to reveal her perfect natural tits. He, of course, suckles her nipples and licks her hard belly. Once Jenna's naked, Mike kisses and suckles her ass while she undulates provocatively and then plants his tongue between her labia. Mike's well-practiced and absolutely superb cunnilingus technique soon has Jenna squealing with delight as her pleasure builds to the first of her orgasms of the scene. After Jenna's orgasmic bliss recedes, she gives Mike a slobbery and deep-throat-intensive hand/blowjob. Then, she announces, "I wanna fuck you Darren!" So, while he lies atop their matrimonial bed, she straddles him in cowgirl and lowers her fantastic body down so that her vagina envelops his achingly hard cock (nice insertion footage). Then, while she fucks him using sexy moves, he responds by matching her strokes. Vaginal sex continues through kneeling doggie (Jenna's moves are incredible and her orgasm is earth-shattering!), cowgirl again (more stupendous moves by Jenna), and missionary. At the last second, Mike pulls out and sprays a powerful and substantial load of semen all over Jenna's hard and muscular belly. At this point, Endora (Nina Hartley) appears, sees Darren's semen all over Samantha's belly, and exclaims, "Thank you, Derwood, I was hoping for another grandchild!" Then, she magically disappears. 


Foreplay: Kissing, body licking, tit sucking, tit squeezing, handjob, fellatio, deep throat, stringers, cunnilingus.
Vaginal Positions: Missionary, cowgirl, kneeling doggie.
Anal Positions: None
Girl cums: Repeatedly, during cunnilingus and kneeling doggie sex.
Pop: External belly
Sex rating: 4.85
Video rating: 4.00
Audio rating: 4.50
Production values rating: 4.20


Scene 5

Scene Type: Boy/girl/anal
Performers: Michelle Avanti, Nathan Threat


Scene: While playing with her toy "action figures," Tabitha wonders what her black toy soldier's cock would look like if he were real. So, she twitches her nose and the soldier comes to life...in the form of Nathan Threat. Unbeknownst to Tabitha, nosy-neighbor Gladys Kravitz (Michelle Avanti), hears Tabitha's spell and watches the miraculous transformation through the window. Tabitha is terrified at her "creation" and runs out of the house screaming. Nathan follows and chases her around the yard. Gladys, horrified that a "negro" is chasing a white girl, calls the cops. By the time the police get to the house, Tabitha has turned Nathan back into a toy doll. So, all the officer finds is grandma Endora, 18-year-old Tabitha, and the black toy doll. Horny Endora tries to molest the cop, but he balks...citing ethics! Then, Endora tells Tabitha that the doll must never hear the magical spell again because, if he does, he will come back to life and want to have sex with the first person he sees. As you can probably imagine, Gladys (Michelle Avanti) sneaks back into the Stevens' house, says the magic words, and is then treated to a first-class fucking by a hugely-endowed--and to her way of thinking, off-limits--black man (Nathan). Nathan kisses Michelle, rubs her pantyhose-covered pussy, squeezes her tits, rips off her pantyhose, and then eats her ravenously while she pants and writhes with pleasure. Nathan soon strips off all of Michelle's clothes and then hungrily suckles her pert nipples. Nathan resumes cunnilingus briefly and then tells her to suck his big black dick. Of course, Michelle does so quite willingly and uses her talented hands on his spit-soaked rod, as well. She's also able to deep-throat most of Nathan's substantial length. Later, Michelle mounts and fucks Nathan vaginally in cowgirl. Soon, Nathan responds by pounding her at redline speed as her juicy cunt saturates his pistoning rod and torrents of nasty talk flow from her mouth. Next, they transition to mish so that Nathan can pound her balls deep while her tits bounce joyfully. Vaginal sex continues in kneeling doggie. In due course, Michelle climbs atop Nathan in reverse cowgirl and slowly inches her body down so that her asshole can consume his huge dick. Once Nathan has stuffed her anus, he pounds her hard and fast as her pretty labia wink open and closed. Michelle, too, gets in on the action by fucking him back with powerful moves. However, Nathan does most of the "work" during this segment. At the last moment, Nathan pulls out of Michelle's asshole and then the two move into position for a facial. As Michelle kneels on the floor, Nathan jacks his dick until he shoots his load onto her chin and tits. Smiling broadly, she then sucks his tip dry and licks his still-pulsating rod. Sadly, there's no evidence that Michelle came during this scene.

 
Foreplay: Kissing, tit sucking, tit squeezing, handjob, fellatio, deep-throat, jaw breakers, stringers, cunnilingus, clit jacking.
Vaginal Positions: Missionary, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, kneeling doggie.
Anal Positions: Reverse cowgirl.
Girl cums: No.
Pop: Facial...closed mouth; she sucks him dry.
Sex rating: 3.25
Video rating: 4.50
Audio rating: 4.50
Production values rating: 4.20


Scene 6

Scene Type: Boy/girl
Performers: Teagan Presley, James Deen


Scene: Later that day, Tabitha (Teagan) confesses to her toy action figures that she's not ready for an interracial relationship. She is, however, willing to turn her white male doll into a real man and have sex with him. So, she carries the toy into her bedroom, props it on her pillow, and wiggles her nose. Instantly, the toy turns into super stud James Deen. Teagan caresses James' manly--yet still clothed--chest and strokes his rapidly swelling cock through his jeans. Then, she kisses him deeply as he wakes from a trance. Soon, James is nuzzling Teagan's neck and reaching inside her panties to fervently stroke her panty-covered clit while she fucks him back using sexy moves. Amazingly horny Teagan soon shivers through her first of many orgasms of the scene. After her spasms recede, Teagan pulls James' cock out of his pants and gives him a handjob while he continues to finger her pussy through another pre-sex orgasm. Emboldened by Teagan's obvious pleasure, James rolls her over onto her side--and then her back--and eagerly goes down on her pussy to suckle her clit. Teagan cums again and then she ravenously gives him deep-throat and stringer-intensive head while he gently pulls her flowing blond hair and sharply spanks her gorgeous ass. After they take a quick break to strip each other naked, James briefly suckles Teagan's nipples and then they move on to missionary-style vaginal sex. Uniquely, James pretty much stays still and keeps his cock in place while Teagan uses absolutely amazing moves to fuck the shit out of him. After a while, James takes over and pounds her fast and deep as a breathtaking orgasm overpowers Teagan's amazing body. After Teagan and James spend a short time in spoon, they move on to reverse cowgirl. During this position, Teagan fucks the life out of James while he, in turn, shoves four fingers--along with his cock--into her soaking-wet pussy to, in effect, double-penetrate her. As you might expect, Teagan cums again with an orgasm that seemingly has no end. Later, they move on to kneeling doggie. As they fuck, Teagan, of course, helps out by shaking her ass for him to increase his pleasure. James makes Teagan climax again and then they transition briefly to on-her-side and then cowgirl so that Teagan can again show off her absolutely incendiary moves...and cum again! To finish up, Teagan and James return to mish so that James can ramp up to an orgasm while Teagan begs him to cum all over her face. James does the lady's bidding and, after pulling out of her pussy, shoots his load directly into her wide-open mouth. Teagan then milks and sucks him dry before wiggling her nose to make James return to his doll-like state: "My mommy and daddy are coming home!" Superb scene. One of the year's best couplings. 


Foreplay: Kissing, body licking, tit sucking, hair pulling, handjob, fellatio, deep throat, stringers, cunnilingus, clit jacking.
Vaginal Positions: Missionary, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, spoons, kneeling doggie, on-her-side.
Anal Positions: None
Girl cums: Repeatedly, during foreplay (cunnilingus and clit-jacking), missionary, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, and kneeling doggie.
Pop: Open mouth; she sucks him dry.
Sex rating: 4.60
Video rating: 4.50
Audio rating: 4.00
Production values rating: 4.50


Scene 7

Scene Type: Boy/girl
Performers: Eva Angelina, Dane Cross


Scene: True to his word, Dr. Bombay returns with a doctor (Dane Cross) to "cure" Tabitha's condition. Of course, he also brings along a bevy of beautiful harem girls--this time dressed as nurses. Actually, the miracle-working doctor is a young and inexperienced--yet extremely bright--medical student who has never had sex before. So, his condition for curing Tabitha is for one of the women to fuck him. Since Aunt Clara (Eva Angelina) got them into the mess, she decides to "pay" Dane's price. So, once the family leaves to provide Eva and Dane with a little privacy, they begin by caressing each other, stripping off each others' clothes, and kissing. Soon, Eva begins to "teach" Dane to suckle her nipples, squeeze her tits, caress her flesh, and eat her pussy. Dane proves to be an excellent student of cunnilingus and soon has Eva panting with pleasure: "See, you're a natural!" He also quickly learns to finger fuck and jack clit, too. Of course, master teacher Eva also teaches Dane what a blowjob is supposed to be like and how the inside of a throat feels. And, she shows him how a girl can masturbate during fellatio. After a while, Eva tells Dane to sit down: "I want to show you something." What she shows him is her beautifully tattoed tailbone and ass as she lowers her juicy and accommodating cunt down around his rigid dick in reverse cowgirl. Then, she shows him how a champion cowgirl rides cock. Later, Dane gets to learn how to fuck pussy in missionary, see how his moves cause a woman's tits to bounce joyfully, and hear how a woman's well-chosen nasty words can inflame his lust. Later, they spend some time in kneeling doggie so that Dane can experience, for the first time, a horny woman's orgasm. In due course, they transition to spoon so that Dane can pound Eva through another orgasm. Afterward, Eva begs Dane to cum all over her face. Dane gladly complies with Eva's wishes and shoots his load onto her lips and chin. Eva sucks him dry but, unfortunately, spits out his semen. I hate to see good cum wasted. This is an oddly subdued scene for Eva Angelina. Perhaps it was by design...after all, Dane is supposed to be a virgin. Or, it might have been at the beginning of Eva's pregnancy when she started to slow down a bit. After the scene is over, Dane fulfills his promise and changes Tabitha back into a baby. 


Foreplay: Kissing, tit-sucking and -squeezing, hair pulling, mutual stripping, fellatio, deep throat, cunnilingus, finger-fucking, clit jacking.
Vaginal Positions: Missionary, reverse cowgirl, spoon, and kneeling doggie.
Anal Positions: None
Girl cums: Repeatedly, in spoon and kneeling doggie.
Pop: Closed-mouth facial; she sucks him dry, but spits out his cum.
Sex rating: 3.85
Video rating: 4.50
Audio rating: 4.50
Production values rating: 4.50

Extras

This DVD-9 disc contains a full-motion chapter selector; multiple chapters per sex scene; a Select-a-Star screen that you can use to jump to a menu of sexual positions in the chosen star's scene; a laugh track that you can turn on or off; a actor/director running commentary soundtrack; a five-minute self-running slide show; trailers (animated and live-action) of four X-Play releases; two Behind-the-Scenes featurettes; a "Director/Producer Travelogue" that is really a mutual interview/discussion by the director (Will) and the producer (Scott); and a "Lights! Camera! Action" featurette, which contains rehearsals of plot dialog as well as the planning of the scenes (The freeze-frame sequences, necessary for the "witchly magic" to occur, are interesting to see.). Each of the four "featurettes" lasts about 30 minutes and is worth a look. This selection of extras, while not as extensive as some of the fall's "big" releases by other studios, is damned nice and rates way above average...4.7 stars.

Final Thoughts 

The best things about Not Bewitched XXX include:

  • the director, Will Ryder. Yep, I'm singling out the guy behind the camera first because I think he should be very proud of his accomplishments. I've known Will since I first started to review movies more than ten fucking years ago. For several of those years, Will was a PR professional for several of the major adult studios. Then, against all odds--and against the advice of numerous "professionals" who told him he would never succeed--Will started his own production company, X-Play, and went on to become, in my opinion, the king of porn spoofs. Will's first spoofs were the Britney Rears titles that were parodies of Britney Spears. All the Britney titles are fun to watch, but are even more noteworthy because of the cool juxtaposition of made-for-the-movies musical soundtracks, light-hearted plot, period costumes and props, and hard-core sex. Will also produced and directed the ever-popular Not the Brady's XXX . If its true when they say that "imitation is the most sincere form of flattery," then Will is truly flattered by the plethora of spoofs that have followed his pattern, including Get Smartass and This Ain't the Munsters XXX. Well done, Will Ryder. You sweat the details and it shows.
  • Teagan Presley. Whew, there's a reason that this hot-and-horny blond was one of my first Dr. Jay's Must See Girls in 2007. She plays the grown-up baby Tabitha in Not Bewitched XXX and does not only a fine job of acting her part, but also provides the best sex scenes of the movie. Tabitha, instantly thrust from infancy to young adulthood, explores her own body through masturbation in Scene Two (Teagan performs as if she never actually touched herself before) and boy/girl sex with James Deen in Scene Four. Both of these superb scenes are award-worthy.
  • Jenna Haze. Not only does her sex scene with Mike Horner scorch, but her acting skills are damned good, too.
  • the rest of the cast, which reads like a who's who of porn. Legends Ron Jeremy, Mike Horner, and Nina Hartley are joined by a bevy of multiply-awarded female performers including Eva Angelina, Jenna Haze, Sunny Lane, Sasha Grey, and Aurora Snow. In addition, numerous lesser-known--but still scorching--girls "flesh out" the cast.
  • the soundtrack. Director Will uses a very authentic 1960's style laugh track (you can turn it off using the Extras menu) as well as a musical soundtrack that is reminiscent of, but not exactly the same, as the original sitcom's theme. If you're interested, there's also a director/actor commentary soundtrack.
  • the period props (including an ancient-looking TV set, dial phone, and 45 rpm records), hairstyles (damn, I'm glad puffy hair on women is gone!), and wardrobe (wait until you see the authenticity and appropriateness of mother-in-law Endora's [Nina Hartley] outfit and the wardrobe of crazy Aunt Clara [Eva Angelina]. Of course, Dr. Bombay's [Ron Jeremy] Ali Baba outfit and his harem girl's wardrobe are also perfect.). Almost everything is perfectly period appropriate...except the modern style refrigerator and dishwasher in the Stevens' kitchen.
  • the acting. Ron Jeremy, as always, portrays his character with aplomb and style. Eva Angelina, 2008 AVN Best Actress, superbly portrays wacky Aunt Clara and Jenna Haze does a very nice job in her role as Samantha. Relative newcummer Michele Avanti's hilarious portrayal of nosy neighbor Gladys Kravitz is also notable. Finally, male porn legend Mike Horner also gives a noteworthy performance of whiny Darren Stevens.
  • the eight-girl orgy featuring a couple of my favorite girls--Aurora Snow and Sunny Lane--along with six other hot-and-horny Sapphic veggie lovers.

Not Bewitched XXX could have been better if:

  • the editing would have provided more consistent transitioning footage between sexual positions and if the cuts between a few of the clips had been done in such a way as to insure continuity.

Things I didn't like about Not Bewitched XXX include:

  • girls spitting out cum. If a girl doesn't want to swallow, the guy shouldn't pop in or near her mouth. Spitting out cum is very disrespectful and I'm disappointed that both Eva Angelina and Sasha Grey did it during this movie.
Recap
Overall sex rating: 4.24
Overall video rating: 4.43
Overall audio rating: 4.36
Production values rating: 4.41



Dr. Jay



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