Cast: Jesse Jane, Tommy Gunn, Lisa Ann, Scott Nails, Stoya, Jenna Haze, Evan Stone, Riley Steele, Katsuni, James Deen, Mason Moore, Angelina Valentine, Erik Everhard, Angelina Armani, Mick Blue, Ben English
Length: 186:31 minutes
Date of Production: 3/12/2009
Extras: With the double disc flick (single disc in Blu-ray though) being one of the biggest releases of the year by Digital Playground, I expected the extras to be indicative of the fact and figured company bigwig Joone to sanction a tremendous package of extras. I know paying customers expect this too these days, one look at releases such as Operation Tropical Stormy, The 8th Day, and Flight Attendants all including hours of material to help flesh out the package for loyal company followers. Sadly, the sometimes rushed manner in which the movie was assembled seems to have taken a toll on the extras portion as well, the extras including some trailers, a photogallery, a slide show, and a 17:03 minute Behind the Scenes feature by Robby's half retarded cousin Jamal Johnson and editor Evul Atheng. The humor of the BTS was more understated than usual as well, some sly editing making a few of the ladies look stupid but hardly in the over-the-top manner some of the "Jack" universe titles have done in the past. If anything though, the extras served as a barometer for the world to compare the movie to the rest of the releases for the year, perhaps Digital figuring no one cares about them (the extras on a multi-disc release at least) anymore.
Condoms: One (used in demonstrative fashion, not during the fucking)
Stoya and Jesse Jane
Audio/Video Quality: Teachers was presented in the usual 1.78:1 widescreen as shot by director Robby D. for Digital Playground to be released in this AVC encoded HD version. The resolution was a full 1080p here but as it was shot using the RED camera system, it was optimized for this Blu-ray version as there were some issues in the SD version. One of the problems was with the lack of secondary lighting (such as a C-light to eliminate shadows on the crotches of the ladies getting planked) while another was how portions seemed slightly washed out, lacking enough color saturation to optimally capture the ladies. The abundance of close up shots to the exclusion of most other angles during the scenes was also problematic but the setting of a genuine looking high school and bus certainly helped as much as the prequel made use of a hospital so it was good to see they did not rely on couch-sex like usual. My assessment of the general camera work is that the team is still getting used to the much heavier RED system and its lack of mobility limits what can be done without resolution loss but the editing, presumably by Kurt Tortcher, Joey Pulgadas, and the infamous Nick P. helped, as did the video bitrate averaging close to 23.4 Mbps, one of the highest such rates I've seen in a porn HD release. In all then, it looked better than what most companies would provide these days but was not the team's best looking title to date. The audio was presented in a 5.1 Dolby Digital Surround English, the audio bitrate being a static 448 Kbps using the standard 48 kHz sampling rate. I saw in the BTS how many boom mikes were used to capture the vocals as well as could be expected, the net effect being a lack of ambient echoes as one would expect from such a setting (though the tracks added in seemed to be done so in a haphazard fashion, like birds chirping in a classroom). You could spend some time counting the number of times the crew was seen in reflections or how often the mike dropped into the frame too but that would be a waste of time in my book, the aural qualities largely "fixed" in post production so don't expect a lot of separation or dynamic range unless you're focusing on the musical aspects of the movie. Sonically though, it was handled pretty well even if rushed like the visual portions were at times, the end result fitting for the kind of performances displayed by the cast.
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Body of Review: One of my favorite production companies over the years has been Digital Playground, their high end work impressing me to look beyond the cries of their many critics. Their lead director, Robby D., is notable for his mainstream training as well as his love of the ladies both in front and behind the camera, the end result of his work has been a pile of awards issued by most of the major organizations servicing the industry. Well, this being September, I knew I'd see some big budget extravaganza from the company like their earlier release of Nurses, most companies employing contract performers feeling the need to provide a sort of "time capsule" this time of year. Not surprisingly, this took place in the form of Teachers Blu-ray, a single disc set with minimal extras; the latest release in the vocational series that has proven so popular. I know the critics will howl about the use of the contract staffers, most of whom are no longer with the company, in the role of high school students and as much a company apologist as I am, I will concede this point up front, but there was a huge attempt to make this a premium cast on all fronts, even bringing in hotties such as Lisa Ann, and top tier male talent to flesh out the proceeding. The back cover of the release explained the show like this: "Textbooks, homework, DETENTION, lube, dildos...another typical day at Filmore Bush Academy, where Sex-Ed is a hands-on class. Digital Playground's "Teachers" receives an A+ starring ultra sexy contract stars Jesse Jane, Stoya, Riley Steele, Katsuni and Angelina Armani. Jenna Haze, Angelina Valentine, Mason Moore and Lisa Ann as the Secretary complete the all-star cast! When the girls' intimate diary goes missing, they will do anything to keep the teachers from discovering their secrets. Packed with 8 wild sex scenes, "Teachers" graduates into an orgasmic 9 person school bus orgy where the students give the teachers THE LESSON OF A LIFETIME!" Here's a brief look at the scenes by cast and action, noting that a condom was used for those still interested:
Jesse Jane and Tommy Gunn
Scene One: Jesse Jane, the lusty leading lady featured on the right hand side of the front cover, was up first as she seduced her way out of trouble with Tommy "favorite teacher" Gunn in the bathroom. She was ditching his gym class and ended up on her knees slobbing his knob, the streamers evident as she aggressively blew him with the kind of enthusiasm you just don't see in a teenager. Conceptually, this was an issue of course, only one of the gals in the movie even sort of looking young enough for high school (Riley), but porn is about fantasy and Jesse's legion of fans aren't going to care one bit about her ill-equipped casting here. The manner in which she engulfed his pecker with her mouth made me think this was going to be an oral only scene but she actively rode him vaginally in a few positions too, keeping eye contact with Tommy and showing a modicum of chemistry too. The setting was too cramped to allow them to do a whole lot more though and the opening sex act was only worth checking out thanks to Jesse as the alpha female of the entire flick. The scene ended when Tommy rubbed one out into her mouth, his genetic juice savored before she applied some post coital oral on his dick.
Lisa Ann with Scott Nails
Scene Two: Lisa Ann, perhaps the most popular MILF in all of porn at this writing, was up next as a horny receptionist at the school, warmed up by the youthful exploits she read about in "the book", a diary of misconduct by the contract performers. Scott Nails was the lucky son of a gun to nail her too, the guy making his move as she smoked her cancer stick in the lobby. While he was another anachronism here, he pawed her like he was a lovesick puppy in need of releasing seed, savoring the taste of her tits as they slowly disrobed her. The lighting was off this time as he went down on her, licking at her pussy while her respiration rate elevated, Lisa reciprocating with a fine hand-assisted hummer that showed her dedication to her craft. This oral onslaught led to some decent vaginal plowing too, Lisa only truly active when she was on top of him, the standing fucking showing him clearly in charge. As with the last scene, there was a lot more oral than penetration and she took a mouth pop too, the stream of population pudding gracing her face as the camera cut away to a plotted point.
Stoya and Jenna Haze
Scene Three: Stoya, the foxy brunette spotted on the front cover (with her ass hanging out of her jeans), was up next with popular Jenna Haze, the two ladies teaming up to seduce the Mighty Evan Stone. He played a strict teacher and they played a couple of horny "bad girls", the ladies making the most of an attempt to get him to show them the wonders of condoms. The gals looked too old for their respective parts and he came across more as a hippy teacher than the preaching type evidenced by the limited script but Jenna was worth every penny of her pay as she inhaled his cock hungrily as Stoya watched in amazement. That was when Evan went down on Stoya as Jenna continued her oral assault, Jenna taking the lead during the vaginal penetration as well. Jenna actively rode his cock but for her part, Stoya did engage in some decent taste testing, her looks her most promising aspect this time considering her performance fell short of the mark (and frankly, most gals fail when compared to Jenna when it comes to sexual skills so I'm not going to single Stoya out as mediocre here). Stoya's messy oral before the anal both gals took part in was interesting though, her anal exploits not as markedly heated as Jenna's but she seemed only able to take a portion of his cock, even when he choked her during the penetrative action. The scene closed up with the ladies sharing his modest nut, licking each other clean before the show went back to what started the tryst (Katsuni reading from the diary).
Riley Steele, Katsuni, and James Deen
Scene Four: Riley Steele, the very cute blond featured on the left side of the front cover, was up next with matronly teacher Katsuni, the aged performer having already juiced herself up while reading the diary a bit in her French class. James Deen was the lucky guy this time, watching Riley take her spanking better than expected before Katsuni started going down on the much younger contract gal. On a technical note, there appeared to be a brief moment when the picture froze here around the 76:28 minute mark, perhaps a layer change or rushed coding error around the time when Riley's anal plug was discovered. James jumped in to assist with the oral loving too, kissing Riley as he diddled her before Katsuni sat on her face. Then his pecker came into play, Riley sucking him off better than I've seen from her in awhile though Katsuni putting her to shame as expected. The classroom setting did not provide the trio with many good opportunities to actively fuck though, the desks too short and small even though some attempt was made by the women to ride him more than he rode them. Anal plug aside, Riley escaped his cock in her ass even as Katsuni seemed to do a better job opening her own back door, Riley continuing the theme of the ladies actively engaging in oral despite the modest attempts during the penetration. The scene closed up with the ladies sharing the load orally, Katsuni jerking him off as they took turns going down on him.
Erik Everhard with Mason Moore and Angelina Valentine
Scene Five: Mason Moore and Angelina Valentine, a couple of curvy brunettes not a part of the main group of gals, were up next in the chemistry classroom as nerdy Erik Everhard helped them cram for a test. Exactly how they fit into the rest of the show is a bit of a mystery to me, the supporting story perhaps edited out or lost in a haze of continuity issues during the editing process. Suffice it to say though, more sex is always a good thing in a porno, Erik fueling their respective fires as he went down on them on the counter top. The lighting was again devoid of an all important C-light and some of the footage kept into the final product made me wonder if this might have been a better bonus scene but the levels of energy and enthusiasm displayed during the oral were sorely needed (and more consistent here) so keeping it made sense in the long run. Once Erik was finished snacking on their tits, pussies, and asses, the gals then double teamed his pecker, kneeling before him to aggressively slob his knob. Using their hands in some hand to gland combat, the ladies appeared to relish giving him some solid head, the fake porn moans punctuating the air and only weakening the final result somewhat. The vaginal plowing Erik gave them after that though seemed to show his intensity a lot better than that of the women, the stud focusing on their needs exclusively and attempting to make and keep eye contact but the gals were off in their own little worlds, doing some taste testing of his dick out of each other's snatches. So for the ladies, it appeared more of an endurance contest than a chemistry filled tryst and Erik in his zone will always win in that game. The scene finished up with the ladies sharing a facial, licking each other and otherwise closing up the first scene of the second disc fairly well.
Angelina Armani and Mick Blue
Scene Six: Angelina Armani, the strawberry blond cutie featured in the middle of the pack on the front cover, was up next with teacher Mick Blue. He had the diary and she was determined to get it, seducing him with her feminine charms by dropping to her knees to engulf his cock in her mouth. The initial background noise of birds chirping made me wonder if the scene was initially supposed to be shot outside and the audio production crew might have mixed something up (pun intended) but despite the unsteady camera work, Angelina showed a lot of the potential she had used to get that contract (that later fell apart of course). The chemistry lab seemed too sterile for the manner in which they engaged one another here but her oral was met by a shorter bout of oral loving provided by Mick, his cock soon tearing into her as she bent over the counter. To date, I've been more a fan of hers than a fan of her work and this scene was similar in that sense since it was so unevenly paced, the two vaginally screwing but always showing a better aptitude for oral as they went back to do more of it before her facial. The casting issues aside (for both of them) though, it was an okay scene albeit with limited replay value.
Riley Steele and Jesse Jane with Ben English
Scene Seven: Jesse Jane and Riley Steele, now in principle Ben English's office, were up next as they blackmailed the man into a tryst. The consequences of widespread student teacher sex would also impact him and they surrounded him in his office, using dirty talk to cause the man to sweat it out. That led, of course, to the gals inhaling his cock orally and servicing his balls, making him a co-conspirator in the scandal to say the least but at least a well lubed co-conspirator. As they blew him, Jesse made great efforts to bring Riley up to speed as well, kissing and choking her as she aurally encouraged Ben (using her hand to jerk him off during a titty fuck by Riley). I'm happy to say that Riley came of age this time too, showing how actively she could ride his cock, nearly keeping up with Jesse as the ladies took turns in his lap. Sadly, this was another instance where using close ups most of the time weakened the end result, a shame considering how much both gals put into their performances (yes, the lack of chemistry here was offset by their tremendous energy but they appeared to have little connection with the guy). Still, even the anti-choking coalition will probably find this a decent scene to appreciate, the last portion requiring Ben to jerk himself off rather than have the gals do it to their own faces.
Scene Eight: Jesse Jane, Stoya, Angelina Armani, Riley Steele, Katsuni, Scott Nails, Evan Stone, Mick Blue, and Tommy Gunn, were up last in the school bus orgy reminiscent of an oldie classic "High School Memories". Initially, Stoya and Angelina drag willing Scott into the back of the bus to fuck, the trio making due in the cramped conditions and mediocre lighting. Angelina was the more active rider of the pair, Stoya punctuating the pounding her friend took with some solid oral taste testing, Mick joining in to offer Stoya a bone of her own to suck. The permutations of who did whom quickly blurred though as Jesse and Riley climbed aboard to get some action, Evan Stone, Katsuni, and Tommy joining in after that. By that point, the reality of shooting a scene on a narrow aisled school bus must have hit the director, his best attempts to show the action forcing him to break free of his usual routine to provide some medium shots that worked well in comparison to his lifelong preference for so many close-ups. Orgies are incredibly difficult to shoot in such a manner that most of the action is properly captured and Robby's talents aside, he wasn't up to the task here as someone like the late, great Jim Holliday would have been but despite the shortcomings of the action, I actually liked this scene better than most even if it did not make best use of the cast, the energy levels and passion high enough to compensate on a couple of levels. Most of the semen landed on the faces of the ladies for those that really care, licked off by the better gals in a disjointed manner.
Angelina, Stoya, Riley, and Jesse
Summary: TeachersBlu-ray by director Robby D. for Digital Playground lacked the depth of a true feature and the loosely tied together vignettes were not consistently appealing but I found myself appreciating the trouble he went through to elevate this one past the all too generic productions he is used to making. Riley Steele stood out as the best cast "student" and the adults of the production (Lisa Ann, Katsuni, Ben English, Evan Stone, and Mick Blue) all seemed age appropriate to their roles here, the script a bit too light on humor and depth to really merit as much applause. Still, even the relative lack of extras and technical issues (the movie wouldn't play in my computer, had some minor glitches, and the previously discussed issues in the tech section above) could not weaken this one below what I estimate should be considered a B- grade of Recommended. In short, Teachers reminded me of "High School Memories" and other tributes to growing up in such a manner, and with such a cast, that it will likely win some awards even though it appeared to be rushed to pressing, the appearance of a wealth of now-gone contract gals alone enough to make it well worth your time, money, and seed. I'm sure in the coming days hordes of slavering fanboys will be singing the praises of the movie endlessly without any critical thought but even after a couple of viewings (once for fun and the second time for this review), the lack of polish showed so check it out for yourself but don't expect it to live up to the hype. Jesse Jane was her over the top self and Riley Steele shined in her role so while this wasn't the best & brightest release of the year, it was worth picking up all the same. As for the enhanced Blu-ray version, the company seemed to go with a surreal look as it works its way through the variety of enhancements available to the Red One camera system, not my favorite way to go but certainly offering a "look" that will work for some folks.
---- You can email me with questions at Houstondon @ hotmail.com if you have any constructive criticism of the review too. :) Also you can follow me on twitter @HoustonDon