Cute girls in cute pajamas getting fucked and sucking cock? What's not to love?
Let's find out.
The worst British (I think?) actor ever goes to get his morning paper, and is hit repeatedly with papers after yelling at the paper... person. He also thinks the coffee Ashlynn makes is "yummy." Yes, a grown man called coffee yummy. And then he asks for earl grey tea and toast with marmalade. Because he's FOREIGN. Ha. Ha.
Anyway, so he's clearly "stressed" which leads to sexy times. And we're off. Or, his pants are off, despite his complaints (and why would he complain when a hottie tells you to take your pants off, hmm?)
Ashlynn wins with "I give really good head on Wednesdays." Tony loses with "suck away my little worries." Shut up, nobody wants to hear that.
If a hottie wants to blow you to help
you relive stress, you say "Thank you!" and then shut the
She's average at cocksucking, but she's definitely pretty cute. She then gets fucked from behind, and the pink jammies stay on! Hooray. He then fucks her harder, and she sucks his cock some more.
Yep, she's hot.
The scene is still a little snoozy, and a lot of the sex is done fairly slowly. It also keeps going... and going... and going. He finally cums on her face and she doesn't even open her mouth.
I almost believe they're a real couple - a boring one.
Aww c'mon, you gotta open your mouth!
Now here's what's weird. He cums... and then cums again, like immediately. Perhaps I smell something just a little bit fake.
Then... he asks for a glass of milk.
Summer Silver and Jackie Daniels
So Summer and Jackie are sitting on the bed talking about boys and threesomes. Poor Jackie seems to have a cold, and invites a boy over for them to fuck. Summer is afraid that he'll "stretch me out." LOL.
Mark looks kinda creepy and is over in 4.5 seconds. Jackie tells Mark that Summer's nervous. Mark responds by telling Summer to take her top off. Smoooooooth.
Jackie is pretty decent at sucking cock, but she shouldn't do the hand fakey thing when she doesn't need to... especially while she's wearing tips from the '80s.
Mark starts playing with Jackie's nipples, and Jackie says, "Bite 'em off." Um, EW.
So then they both suck cock for a while. I think Summer's better at it.
Exactly what every guy thinks slumber parties really are.
Now all the pajamas come off, but Summer leaves her totally awesome socks on. Summer and Jackie kiss while Mark licks Summer's pussy and then fucks her. Jackie then plays with Summer's nipples but it's apparently one of those take-turns types of threesomes. They switch pretty soon after.
Ok, who wants to buy me those adorable socks? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?
Finally Summer and Mark both start licking Jackie for a little while. Then Summer sucks Mark's cock after he's been fucking Jackie. Then they both suck his cock again and Jackie suddenly gets better at it!
This scene is also pretty long, and a lot of the same stuff over and over. Sorry, I get bored fast.
Finally, things change a bit. Jackie gets between Summer's legs and licks Mark's balls while he fucks her, and then Mark fucks Summer while Summer licks Jackie. It's OK but nothing really special. Hilariously, Mark starts fucking the shit out of Summer, so she really can't do anything to Jackie (who continues to moan throughout). Ha.
-- sponsored by --
Tough to do when you're being literally pounded like you're on a trampoline.
And now I'm really and truly bored. Are we done yet? This scene is sooooooo loooooooong. *snoooooore* It's like 40 minutes to a super watery, sparse cumshot. Ew.
Anthony wakes up from a bad dream, where his dick was cut off and put in a pickle jar... because THAT'S what guys want to think about when they're about to watch porn.
Clearly he just heard about the setup to this scene. I feel you.
Thankfully, Taylor found his dick for him. Which was already hard. After he dreamed about his pickled penis. Um...
Taylor does OK on the cocksucking.
Anthony tells Taylor to spit on his cock. That's fine. Then he tells her to spit in his mouth. Um.
OK, there are certain porns where that is OK. This is not one of those porns. That's a really unfortunate choice and it should have been cut.
Ooh, Taylor's a bit of a yelper.
OK whoa. So Anthony is fucking Taylor... not really hard, and he's not going in all the way... and then the camera pans up, and we see that Taylor's foot is firmly on Anthony's face.
Fucking hilarious. :)
So... let me repeat. There are certain porns where that is OK.
This is not one of those porns.
Finally Anthony starts fucking her harder, and well, Taylor just kind of sounds like she's in pain. We get a couple of ass slaps, and he puts a finger in her ass, but then they return to sex. Again, she just looks and sounds like it's all very unpleasant. She also looks like she has some serious and painful razor burn.
Ow! Holy fuck, honey, time to change the razor blade!
She sucks on his cock for a while, and then they fuck, and then she sucks on his cock again... and I'm kind of hoping they'll be done soon, even though I just know they won't be!
Oh wait! This scene actually was shorter than the others, and she gets the tiniest amount of cum on her mouth. It's gotta be one of the smallest cum shots I've ever seen.
In what world is that an acceptable cumshot? No world I want to live in!
And at the end, he mentions the pickle jar again. Somebody needs to shut them up.
Psst. Also not sexy.
Mark brings Lexi mail, and Lexi asks him to look at her broken vacuum. They actually had something in the vacuum too. Look at the attention to detail!
Lexi then tells him she needs her pipes fixed.
Oh my god.
Did this actually just happen?
So Lexi relieves him of his pants, and apparently fixing vacuums really turns Mark on. Lexi sucks at sucking though... maybe they should try the vacuum instead?
If that's as far down as you can go, you need to go back to school.
Lexi leaves her cool knee socks on for this one, too. I love the socks!
Ok, who wants to buy me THESE awesome socks? Anyone? C'mon! Please?
OK, so, her tank top is still on, and just look at that picture above. Holy damn! They look magnificent and glorious and delicious. I'm can't wait to see them.
So Mark finally pops out her huge boobs and... AAAAAH.
WTF! Boobs should not do that!
There's nothing like a good boob job, and Lexi has NOTHING like a good boob job!
There are these funky wrinkles under her breasts and...
Omg omg, please put the shirt back on! *hides*
Then they're doing it doggy style, so I don't have to look at them. *is relieved*
She's also a bit of a whiner and OH MY GOD she gets up on top and the boobs are so much worse now!!
I am speechless. I am without speech.
Finally he cums on her face and we're all relieved. Almost an eye shot! Pretty watery though.
Nikkie is using my toothbrush! She manages to brush her teeth without toothpaste or spitting! Then she's kissing Anthony. Setup... done!
Bitch stole my oral hygeine products! Or we both shop as Costco. One of those two.
Then Nikkie is... jiggling her ass for the camera?
She's got pierced nipples, a pierced tongue and some weird-ass tattoos. She then gives one of the worst "blowjobs" ever. The CHEATER here is just as bad as Lexi. Then he starts fucking her, and he should, because he wasn't going to get anywhere with that blowjob.
Arrrgh crappy blowjobs!
And THEN Nikkie actually deep throats Anthony a couple times, all the way to the balls. What the FUCK? Why wasn't she doing that the whole time?
What the hell? If you can do that, why were you giving such a shitty blowjob?
Then there's some fucking, and more crappy sucking, and then she hangs off the bed a bit while he fucks her face a bit. She does pretty well for a little while. I'm confused at her schizo behavior.
And at some point, the sheets disappeared from the bed. Wow. That's some editing, kids.
Now you see sheets...
Now you don't!
He cums all over that big butt and we're treated to a view of her tramp stamp while she whine-moans about it and jiggles her ass again.
Behind the scenes (interviews... with cocksucking!), bonus scene (redhead Dani Jensen/Johnny Castle - she has weird teeth although there's some decent fucking. Again with the knee socks?), photo gallery (stretched photos), pick your pleasure (classifies scenes by sexual acts, positions), trailers, web trailer, company info.
The Behind the Scenes bit was actually the hottest part of the whole disc (at least the beginning of it). Jackie Daniels and Summer Silver are just sitting around talking with the cameraman, and they end up sucking and fondling cock while they do. They're laughing, they're having fun... it's just hot people hanging out and talking while they suck cock like it's the most normal thing to do during a conversation. If only the rest of the movie were so hot.
The hits: The girls are mostly nice to look at (Ashlynn is easily the hottest, she's very pretty), the pjs are cute and either stay on the whole time or for a long time. Oh, and THE AWESOME SOCKS.
The misses: Weak cumshots (open your mouth, Ashlynn!) , scenes generally run on WAY too long and become very dull, milk and pickled cocks are not sexy, and Lexi'S OMG bad boob job. O_O