XCritc.com Adult DVD Reviews
Popular Searches:
Porn Reviews » Adult Movie Reviews » Beach Patrol

Beach Patrol

Studio: Jules Jordan Video » Review by Don Houston » Review Date: 9/16/10

XCritic's Advice: Recommended

click for trailer

Beach Patrol

Jules Jordan Video

Genre: Gonzo

Director: Jules Jordan

Cast: Candace Cage, Jules Jordan, Rachel Starr, Gracie Glam, Victoria Lawson, Levi Cash, Penelope Piper, Mariah Milano

Length: 188:12 minutes

Candace Cage with Jules Jordan

Date of Production: 6/29/2010

Extras: The best extra was the 20:57 minute long Behind the Scenes feature, the ladies all given even more time to shine at the beach and in various states of undress as well as deleted sex footage. There was then a photogallery, a popshot recap, six trailers, a cast list, a biography for the director, and some websites to check out.

Condoms: None

Rachel Starr

Audio/Video Quality: Beach Patrol was presented in an anamorphically enhanced 1.78:1 widescreen color the movie was shot in by director Jules Jordan for Jules Jordan Video in the MPEG-2 codec used for standard definition releases (in 480 resolution). There was some variation in the lighting that added additional grain but I saw a few other issues as the camera kept an active stance at providing the best angles to showcase the ladies. The editing helped in this endeavor too with a movie as long as this one needing extra care to make sure that there is enough tease but also heated sexual antics, my initial impression being that this was a well rounded romp where virtually all the cast had a lot of fun. The bitrate was on the modest side yet there were few compression artifacts, the aliasing minimal and given the length of the single disc offering (still clocking in with nearly enough material for a double disc though), fans of gonzo scenes should be very pleased. The bitrate hovered all over the place this time, higher than usual with most of the movie in the 3.4 Mbps range, but varying across the board depending on the scene. The audio was presented in a 2.0 Dolby Digital English (at 192 Kbps with a 48 kHz sampling rate) offering that really didn't use any separation in terms of the vocals (there was some potential to do so here too). The dynamic range was also kind of generic, but the visuals have long ruled in most of Jules' past works too.

Gracie Glam and Victoria Lawson with Levi Cash

-- sponsored by --

Body of Review: Jules Jordan made waves founding Jules Jordan Video and leaving Evil Angel's lucrative distribution deal years back, his stance on his stable of directors offering similar amounts of quality as well as quantity in their titles making the brand name stand above almost all others. As DVD mastering technology has improved, Jules occasionally offers single disc titles, the many always making sure his hand selected casts of ladies are up to the challenge of giving fans what they want in various thematic endeavors. His latest such title is called Beach Patrol, the director heading to Florida to comb the beaches of the state for high quality ladies willing to tease in bikinis, often provide public displays of nudity, and then take him on with some scenes even including bareback anal. The emphasis on tanned women this time was pleasing, all of the ladies coming across as young, hot, and having a need for seed from the director himself (though in one of the five scenes, he allows a fellow director to step in and bang the babes). Here's a brief look at the scenes by cast and action, noting that no condoms were used for those still interested:

Penelope Piper with Jules Jordan

Scene One: Candace Cage, the fetching brunette seen on the upper middle of the front cover, was up first as she paraded around in some loose fitting clothing that merely hinted at her lovely curves. She was walking along when Jules Jordan struck up a conversation with her, the duo talking as he used the camera to check her out more thoroughly in a parking garage. They went into an SUV where she pulled out his pecker to suck, her handjob exciting him even more though the real fun began back at a seaside room overlooking the beach. Candace was wearing a skimpy pink bikini and she couldn't wait to go back down on him, the POV footage replaced by a dedicated cameraman as she disrobed and worked more intimately with Jules. He ate her out and they began actively screwing vaginally, some ass slapping encouraging her to pump faster as she moaned mechanically. They were all over the couch and ottoman before he choked her a little and rubbed out a nut of genetic juice to her face, her beautiful eyes glistening with warmth at the load she just received.

Mariah Milano

Scene Two: Rachel Starr, the busty brunette seen on the lower left hand corner of the cover, was up next as the Miami Beach travelogue continued with Jules Jordan narrating. He took in the sights from above, stalking her a bit as numerous others enjoyed the beach and perfect weather. Her great ass looked fine in the colorful bikini bottom and she went topless to the delight of onlookers, wading into the surf before they retired to the room overlooking the beach. She stripped down and he ate her ass, his hands warming up her pussy as their mutual chemistry came to light. She blew him on the balcony and they began vaginally banging, moving inside where she gave a sweet little tease until he gave her more head. She reciprocated and they were soon bumping uglies again, both of them into the action. They moved about the condo until some more oral and vaginal work led to Jules busting a nut of population pudding all over her face (glazing her quite thoroughly).

Scene Three: Gracie Glam and Victoria Lawson, the two very cute ladies seen on the upper left hand side of the front cover being pawed by moper Levi Cash, were up next as they rode their bicycles along the strip. This being Jules' first time to the area, the ladies could have been more inviting but they played it cool as he followed them around, Levi showed amazement that Jules was in the South Beach area. The attitude of the ladies changed considerably after that, making out in the SUV and showing some tit before getting to the room and really getting into one another. Levi watched and jumped in soon enough, holding Victoria as Gracie tasted her tits. The ladies went back and forth as the clothing slipped off too, the trio moving to the couch where some deeper oral took place, the ladies going down on each other before blowing Levi. There was some face sitting and the ladies engaged in lots of taste testing, Levi choking them and getting rough as the women appeared to like things. This general kind of thing continued all around the place until he jerked off to their faces, the ladies happily sharing the spunk in the chemistry filled scene.

Scene Four: Penelope Piper, the busty young lady shown on the lower right hand corner of the front cover, was up next as she showed Jules Jordan a large apartment. Her accent was noticeable and her tits practically hung out, Jules assisting her with the DVD player (that ended up showing a recent scene starring his pals Erik Everhard banging Mason Moore from Oil Overload 3) and the television display of sexual heat helping get her ready for some real life fun with Jules. He slyly encouraged her to free herself and he went in when her tits came out, passing off the camera and fingering her as she moaned in pleasure. She dropped to her knees to blow him in a playful manner, lacking some of the technical skill seen elsewhere but making up for it in sheer lustful desire. She masturbated as she inhaled his cock too, throating him before he went down on her, oiling her up to get her off. Her pussy was dripping wet as she fingered herself, the couple moving into some active vaginal positions that proved her thick body was up to the challenge. The couple even did some anal, though they slowed down considerably when doing so, Penelope spreading her ass cheeks apart with her hands to ease the pain. There was then some taste testing and Jules unleashed copious amounts of seed on her face, the gal happily providing some post coital head to end it.

Scene Five: Mariah Milano, the hot looking brunette seen on the upper right hand side of the cover, was up last, her neon green bikini offering scant resistance to the camera Jules Jordan was focusing so intently on her body. Her thong was pulled through her ass crack really deeply, her nipples protruding as she spoke highly of wanting to work with the director. They skipped the beach stuff to go right into the tease on the balcony, her body built for comfort over speed in a way I found particularly appealing. She masturbated and his boner was too much to leave alone, Jules moving over to the couch to fondle and eat her before she sucked him off like a champion. Mariah was an active vaginal rider of cock and bounced on his rod very hard, the rapid pacing such that even her short breaks to taste her juices off his prick didn't weaken the overall dynamic. They moved about the apartment too, Mariah soon milking all his semen from his balls with a blowjob and handjob combination.

Summary: Beach Patrol by director Jules Jordan for Jules Jordan Video was not one of his most distinctive titles to date, but I liked it enough to suggest it as a Recommended title all the same. The implication that all the women would have natural tits and do anal (per the cover verbiage under the title that I now know referred only to Penelope Piper) weakened it for me and not all the ladies had the same appeal or chemistry with Jules. There was some decent replay value though, especially thanks to Rachel Starr, Mariah Milano, and Candace Cage, and the technical values were a decided step or three up from the usual crowd that shoots in the South Beach/Miami Beach area so if you enjoy this type of thing, feel free to elevate my own suggestion for the rating. In short, Beach Patrol was a loosely tied together series of five beach scenes, a number of physically attractive ladies making it worthy of spank bank material.

You can email me with questions at Houstondon @ hotmail.com if you have any constructive criticism of the review too. :) Also you can follow me on twitter @HoustonDon

comments powered by Disqus
Popular Reviews

The Preacher's Daughter
Lisa Ann Back 4 More
My DP Vol. 4
Pirates 2 Stagnetti's Revenge
Hookup Hotshot Sex Tapes Vol 1
Angela Volume Three
Gangbang Creampie: Spunk'd Spinners
I Love My Mom's Big Tits 5
Anal Newbies #7
The Set Up

Featured Reviews

Get XCritic Via Email:

Enter your email address:

Delivered by FeedBurner