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Advice: Rent It
Director: Jim Enright
Cast: Ariana Jollee,
Must-See Girls in Cast: None.
In a very short 71 minutes, Krystal Steal relates the story of her character's rise to--and fall from--stardom as a top runway model. In addition to the plot, director Jim Enright manages to squeeze in five sex scenes. Believe me, both plot and sex are really condensed in this movie!The movie begins as Krystal and her model friends strut their stuff on the runway. Krystal, living only on booze, pills, cocaine, and vitamins, collapses on the stage. As her friends and the audience try to revive her, she, through voice-overs, tells us about her rise to fame and subsequent fall in flames.
Perhaps because Krystal is too doped-up to be coherent, the story progresses disjointedly and is rather incomplete. She first relates how her manager, played by Barrett Blade, takes his fee from her body rather than from her wallet. Later, Krystal goes back in time to relate her story-book and idyllic childhood, her first steps on the road to model superstardom, her move to New York and signing with a big-time agent (Manuel Ferrera), her association with already-famous models (Keri Sable, Ariana Jollee) and her subsequent downhill slide.
The plot is rather incomplete and leaves lots of unanswered questions. We do learn that Keri Sable, a closet lesbian, turns Krystal on to drugs as a way to avoid food: "food is not good for you!" Keri teaches Krystal to live only on vitamins, booze, and drugs so that she won't get fat. Eager to please--and to claw her way to the top--Krystal learns quickly. In fact, she learns too well and soon surpasses Keri as the biggest model in her agency. Of course, a lifestyle devoid of nourishment must eventually come to a screeching halt. Krystal's does, on the stage.
Other than a few moments at the beginning and end of Krystal's career, we don't get any insight about her life from the time she meets Keri Sable to the time she passes out on stage. So much more could have been done to this story to make it memorable and award-worthy. Alas, that didn't happen. I really think the notion of this story is viable and am disappointed it wasn't played out more thoroughly. Given Club Jenna's sterling reputation ("sterling" is my acknowledgment of Justin Sterling, Jenna's husband) and attention to plot development and detail, I am quite disappointed in the incompleteness of the story.
I'm also disappointed in the delivery of dialog and monolog. I have been a major fan and supporter Krystal Steal since I saw her first scene with Peter North. In fact, I was so impressed that I weaseled her phone number from a friend of mine and called to tell her that she would one day follow in Jenna's footsteps (seriously--it turned out to be a prophetic statement!). Along the way, I've interviewed her and written thousands of words about her because I truly admire and respect her--not only for her drop-dead-gorgeoous body but also for her business acumen, dedication, and brains. So, I say this with great admiration and respect: Krystal, take some diction lessons! Please learn how to properly enunciate, time, and deliver your lines. I know that you speak clearly and articulately in person and on the phone--I know because I interviewed you for about 45 minutes by telephone. However, whenever you read lines--especially in the voiceovers in this movie--you become wooden and tongue-tied. I had to listen to your monologs several times before I understood what you had to say. Please do yourself a favor and learn how to be more verbally expressive. Your value as a star will increase exponentially. On the plus side, you look absolutely superb in every way. Your body is in excellent condition and the makeup and wardrobe you wore in Steal Runway are perfect for you.
We don't really watch porn for the plot or for the acting ability of the performers. So, had the sex been stellar, I would have been satisfied no matter how weak the story or the delivery of lines. Alas, only one scene rises to four-and-one-half star status, and that is a superb--yet truncated--coupling between Ariana Jollee and Manuel Ferrera. Other scenes are lackluster: in fact, two scenes are composed of only two sex positions! Even Nick Manning's scene with Krystal Steal is weak--and Nick is usually able to get superb performances out of the girls he fucks. I'm not sure if the performers were told to cool it or if they just didn't feel like fucking when the movie was filmed. In any case, YAWN!
Much has been written in marketing materials and on other websites about the DVD bonus "scene" that features Jenna Jameson and Krystal Steal. Let me set the record straight: it is not a sex scene. Instead, it appears to be video footage of a still photo shoot. The women mechanically eat each others' pussies, rub their bodies together, chastely kiss, and so forth as they would if still shots were being taken. However, there is absolutely no passion. In fact, while Krystal eats her pussy, Jenna gets so bored that she reaches over to play with a laptop computer that's sitting on the couch next to hear. One other thing, and I don't mean to be cruel. Anybody who's ever seen Jenna Jameson in public knows she is a remarkably beautiful woman. However, in this bonus "scene," she appears almost haggard. Whoever did her makeup for this "scene" should be fired.
All said, I am disappointed with this Club Jenna release. Jenna's studio's releases of Briana Loves Jenna, Bella Loves Jenna, Krystal Method, and The Masseuse have all been well-crafted as well as hotter-than-hell. Steal Runway is neither.
Check out some photos of the girls in Steal Runway here.
Pay particular attention to the photos of Barbie Doll blond Krystal Steal! Enjoy!
Scene One is a flashback as related by Krystal as she lies in a drug-induced stupor on the floor. The encounter occurred immediately before Krystal went on stage and is a payback to her agent, played by Barrett Blade. While preparing for her walk down the runway, bare-assed naked Krystal snorts two lines of coke, smokes a cigarette, and washes down some pills with booze. Intoxicated, Krystal tries unsuccessfully to kick her agent (Barrett) out of her dressing room. She can't really understand him, nor can she see him clearly. However, she eventually succumbs to his expectation for sex and drops to her knees to give him a rather spirited blowjob (her mind hasn't dulled that far!). Shot-from-below camera work captures Krystal's superb tits and greedy mouth as she spits on, strokes, and gobbles Barrett's dick. In addition, excellent camera shots capture Krystal's gnarly tailbone tattoo. After the blowjob, things go downhill fast. Foregoing cunnilingus, the action cuts abruptly to doggie so Barrett, wearing a fucking condom, can pound Krystal's inebriated pussy from behind. I'll be kind and assume that Krystal is acting "in-role:" that is, she's pretending to fuck like a stoned-out-of-her-mind woman would do. In any case, there's certainly no passion evident in the sex--in fact, her moans and groans are mechanical and a bit forced. I must admit, however, that effective camera angles show off Krystal's superb body during this segment. After snorting another line of coke, Krystal lies back on her make-up chair so Barrett can fuck her missionary style (nice close-ups of Krystal's bald pussy swallowing Barrett's cock). By this time, Krystal is really out of it, doesn't seem to even know what's going on, and certainly doesn't look like she's enjoying herself! Then, after having worked himself into a sweat-inducing lather by fucking Krystal in only two positions--and not even attempting to make her cum--Barrett pulls out, tears off his condom, and shoots his semen all over her rock-hard belly and big boobs. Talk about one-sided sex: the guy fucks and the smashed girl gets fucked. Yawn! The only thing this scene has going for it is Krystal's first-class body. Three and one-half stars.
Realizing that she started telling her tale too far into her story, Krystal skips back to the beginning, talks about her idyllic small-town childhood and how she was "discovered" by a photographer played by director Jim Enright. After completing a hot girl/girl photo shoot with Leah B., Krystal and Jim begin to make out and are immediately interrupted by Selena Silver. Selena tries to convince Krystal to stop her modeling career while it's not too late. Krystal, however, will not hear because "men desire me, they find me beautiful, they are mesmerized." So, she's off to New York to meet with a top agent (Manuel Ferrera). Manuel decides to take her on and make her "one of the biggest models anybody has ever seen." He also gives her a place to stay--an apartment she is to share with Manuel's current top model, Keri Sable.
After Krystal leaves Manuel's office, one of his former girls, Ariana Jollee, arrives and, after a brief and pointed discussion about the non-progress of Ariana's career, Manuel strips off her clothes and kisses her as they stand behind his desk. Damn, Ariana has great boobs! After she squirms out of her pants, Manuel lifts her thong-clad ass onto his desk and, while they continue to kiss, he sharply spanks her heart-shaped butt cheeks. Soon, she loosens his pants and, after they drop to the floor, lets him fuck her throat. Of course, she strokes it, too. However, she spends most of the time deep-throating its spit-lubricated length while gagging and slurping noisily. Foregoing cunnilingus, Manuel soon has his condom-sheathed cock deep inside her pussy, missionary style, and fucks her frantically while she screams out torrents of nasty invective (great close-ups). Damn, Ariana is a great fuck, groaning, panting, and motivating Manuel to higher and higher levels of lust. She cums like a volcano within seconds: her entire body quivers and quakes as waves of pleasure envelop her. Manuel, a very good woodsman, keeps her pleasure flowing by continuing to pound her harder and faster while she fingers her own clit. All this pleasure soon results in an orgasm with a twist: Ariana squirts! Manuel is relentless and never stops reaming her. So, within seconds, she squirts again while screaming and growling with delight. Later, they transition to doggie. As the camera captures the action from below, Ariana, in ecstasy, gets her pussy fucked hard by Manuel's balls-deep and redline-speed strokes: "I love that mother fucking cock! Fuck me, mother fucker!" After Ariana cums again, she drops to her knees and jacks off Manuel's cock until he deposits and extraordinary amount of semen into her wide-open and greedy mouth and onto her pretty face. After she sucks his cock dry, she swallows everything in her mouth. Again, this scene is comprised of only two positions. Had the scene been allowed to play itself out some more, this could have been a five-star coupling. Alas, it's too short and is worth four and one-half stars.
After Krystal moves into Manuel's apartment with Keri, Keri teaches her the ropes, turns her onto coke ("I wanted it more than anything I ever wanted in my life and I wanted it more than life itself!"), gets her some jobs, and admonishes her to never eat. One of Keri's lessons involves "sleeping her way to the top." And, to demonstrate just how it's done, Keri fucks a photographer, Jay, after a shoot she and Krystal just finished. Why? To get a modeling gig, of course! Darling blond and lithe Keri, who's now a Wicked Pictures contract star and one of my favorite new girls, wants the job real bad. So, she aggressively kisses Jay while rubbing his jeans-covered crotch with her hands. Jay quickly ignites and, while stroking her flesh with his hands, nuzzles her neck. Soon, Keri's on her knees gobbling, licking, and stroking Jay's cock while he, in turn, reaches down and squeezes her fine thong-clad ass cheeks (too many digital special effects lessen the impact of this otherwise hot blowjob). Bypassing pussy eating (does this director have something against cunnilingus?), Keri mounts Jay's condom-protected cock in the reverse cowgirl position. While the camera zooms in tight on Keri's pretty pink and bald pussy, she energetically fucks him by thrusting her fabulous all-natural body up and down on his dick (great camera angles and close-ups). Keri really likes to fuck him, as evidenced by her shouts of joy and her so-wet pussy, a pussy that drips and glistens as it swallows and spits out Jay's cock. Even so, she never appears to cum. Later, they transition to missionary: Keri lies on a bed atop a furry white blanket while Jay fucks her with balls-deep strokes. As he fucks her, the camera zooms in tight on her oh-so-desirable vagina while her labia caress his throbbing dick. In due course, they spend some quality time in that very difficult position: piledriver. As Keri sits, as it were, on her shoulders, Jay stands above her and between her legs, bends his cock way down, and fucks her tight pretty pussy while she shouts for joy. Without satisfying Keri with an orgasm, Jay has her kneel before him so he can jack off directly into her mouth. All of his powerful first spasm enters her mouth--temporarily. She greedily swallows and then sucks his cock dry. Four stars.
Krystal soon learns a secret about Keri: that she and Dani Woodward are lesbian lovers! One evening, Keri and Dani retire to their bedroom and begin to kiss passionately as they sit on their bed. As they undress each other, their caresses become more intense, their kisses deeper, their touches more intimate, and their murmurs more endearing. Then, the scene ends! What the hell? Why didn't they finish? This is so disappointing.
In Scene Four, Krystal demonstrates that she's learned Keri's lessons: she decides to fuck a photographer (Nick Manning) so she can get a job that she wants. She meets Nick in a romantically lit apartment, sits with him on his couch, and readily agrees that she knows what it will take to get the job. She then drops to her knees and, while Nick stands before her, she sucks and strokes his cock, making stringers with her mouth (great close-up video). While she eyes him intently, Nick hurls just a bit of his trademark nasty invective to her for motivation. Once Nick's cock is titanium hard, he tosses Krystal onto his couch, slips off her panties, and, after licking his way south from her big boobs, spends several glorious minutes devouring Krystal's magnificent vagina (at long last, some cunnilingus!). Krystal immediately responds to his touch, undulating her body erotically and moaning contentedly while squeezing her own bountiful boobs. Nick also finger-fucks Krystal's pussy while suckling and rapid-fire licking her clit. Once Krystal's pussy is flowing with her own juices and Nick's saliva, he slips his cock into her pussy and slowly fucks her missionary style. Nick gradually increases intensity, and Krystal's moans and shouts follow suit. Eventually, of course, Nick reams her at redline speed while her body squirms with delight. As the scene continues, they transition to doggie so that Nick can fuck her from behind while admiring her gnarly tailbone tattoo. Nick sinks his cock balls-deep into her as he talks somewhat nasty (he's usually a LOT nastier!). Meanwhile, Krystal's big breasts bounce delightfully as she hurls her body back and forth in sync with Nick's thrusts. Later, they again transition: this time to reverse cowgirl. Krystal's body looks so fucking fine as she feverishly hurls it up and down on Nick's cock. She's SO into the sex that she tosses her head back with delight as she shouts out and sweats profusely. To finish up, Nick jacks himself off onto Krystal's tongue. She lets the semen roll off her tongue and then sucks him dry. Four stars!
After another girl/girl photo shoot with Keri, Krystal continues to demonstrate her newfound career-enhancing techniques. In the same way that Keri fucked her photographer for a job in Scene Three, Krystal takes on this photographer. Only, there's a twist: this photographer is a girl (Brooke Haven). The naughtiness begins during the shoot: Brooke reaches out to Krystal, slips aside her top, and fondles her boobs as she takes photos. Keri quickly gets the message and gets the hell off the set (Soon, she's forced out of her agent's apartment, too.). Once Keri has left the set, Brooke loses all her inhibitions and suckles Krystal's splendid nipples while probing her tight, wet pussy with spit-lubricated fingers. Krystal, knowing how to fuck her way to the top, takes it in stride: who cares who you fuck so long as you get what you want? So, she pushes aside Brooke's blouse and greedily fondles her boobs. Further inflamed by Krystal's touch, Brooke drops to her knees and, as Krystal lifts her left leg high, licks, sucks, and probes Krystal's vagina with tongue and fingers: "Oh, you're SO wet!" Later, Krystal bends Brooke down, doggie style, atop a staircase so she can fuck her with a vibrator from behind. The toy's shaft has bulbous knobs to stimulate the inside of Brooke's pussy as well as "rabbit ears" to stimulate her clit. Krystal fucks Brooke hard with the toy, so hard that Brooke's meaty ass cheeks jiggle gloriously. Later, Krystal works multiple perfectly manicured fingers deep into Brooke's wet, juicy, and oh-so-pink hole. Meanwhile, Krystal licks and bites mouthfuls of Brooke's ass! Brooke likes to have her butt the center of attention. So, she spanks herself, too! Later, as Brooke lies on her back, Krystal straddles Brooke's face so that Brooke can eat her pussy and squeeze her ass cheeks. Meanwhile, Brooke fingers her own pussy and undulates her body erotically. Eventually, Brooke adds her fingers to the mix and rapidly finger fucks Krystal's pussy concentrating, it appears, on her g-spot. The scene ends, before either girl can cum, with a sweet kiss. Three and one-half stars.
Video (technical): The video is generally good and is appropriate given the sets and locations employed in the production. I would have preferred for the lighting to be a bit more even: some of the action is hidden in deep shadows. Camera angles are generally OK and the color balance acceptable (if a bit on the orange side). However, somebody went a little overboard in editing: way too many special effects (bubbles and the like) were digitally added and they detract from--rather than support--the on-screen sex. When the special-effects background makes you look at it rather than at the people fucking in the foreground, you know you've got problems. On the plus side, the special effects that made the video appear as it would through Krystal's drug-impaired eyes (Scene One) are very effective. Three and one-half stars.
Audio (technical): The audio is clear and audible. However, when watching/listening to the movie on my computer screen--my sound sticks are to the left and right of the monitor--I heard the oddest movement of sound from the left to the right and then back again. For example, if Krystal is on the right side of the screen and she's moaning, the sound of her moans comes from the right, then the left, then the right speaker. How unnerving! Other than that, the dialog and monologs are audible and of sufficient volume. There is a musical soundtrack, but the music does not overpower the sounds of sex. Three and one-half stars.
Extras: The Extras include an approximately four minutes long "Behind the Scenes" feature that isn't. Instead, it's still and motion shots of several of Krystal's photo shoots. Actually, it's pretty hot because Krystal looks extremely hot throughout the footage and the video was quite erotically filmed. However, it is NOT Behind the Scenes footage. On the other hand, the seven and one-half minute "Outtakes and Bloopers" reel is really Behind the Scenes foolishness. It's really kind of funny. I've already mentioned my disappointment with the "Jenna & Krystal Bonus Scene" (see the Synopsis above). There's also an approximately four minutes long self-running slide show (great shots from this movie) and URLs so you can watch the Steal Runway trailer on your computer (it's not included on the DVD) and visit both Jenna's and Krystal's websites. Three stars.
Aesthetics: The locations, sets, wardrobe, jewelry, and makeup are all superb. However, unlike other Club Jenna releases, very little thought went into the musical soundtrack. It's typical upbeat porn music that doesn't contribute or support the on-screen action in any tangible way. If you want to hear a super soundtrack for a porn flick, watch Club Jenna's Briana Loves Jenna. Four stars.
Average sex rating
3.90Average video rating:
3.50 Average audio rating:
3.50 Average production values rating:
4.00 Extras rating:
3.00 Bonus point(s):
0.00 Overall rating:
X Critic Pick (4.5+ sex; 4.0+ production values; 4.5+ overall)
Highly Recommended (4.5+ sex; 4.0+ overall)
Recommended (4.0+ sex; 4.0+ overall)
Rent It (<4.00 sex; <4.00 overall)
Skip It (<3.50 sex; <4.00 overall)
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