Nope, nope, I will not do it, I don't care how funny I think it will be, I will not at any point quote the lyrics from the original show's theme song at all. No, sir. I have my limits, too. The theme song from Will Smith is a classic earwig, a song so bad but so catchy you have to sing along to it. He has magical powers.
Thankfully though the official parody from Black Ice doesn't try to mimic the song and risk a lawsuit. It does however do everything it can to stick to the show. There's no heavy fat guy as a dad, no annoying little kid making funny one-liners, or a middle aged mom, but there is the scenario of the characters of Hillary and Ashley being pounded in to submission for those of you who thought about that during the show's run. Don't lie to yourself, you knew you were thinking it once Tatyana Ali became legal and Hillary bounced around in skimpy dresses.
With CJ Wright who looks like Will Smith if you squint your eyes and have cataracts plays the Fresh Prince with Dawayne Dane playing Carlton, I'm assuming, "Official Fresh Prince of Bel Air Parody" is a mixed bag that tries to imitate the show's formula of sitcom scenarios and even has Dawayne Dane imitating Carlton's infamous dance at some point which is all just a soft groan once you forget about it and lay eyes on the absolutely sexy and mind blowingly hot female porn stars who get their chance to shine the prince's staff throughout this porn comedy. I found myself constantly muttering "Dear god look at her!" every time I laid eyes on the bevvy of ebony goddesses in this flick and if you're at all interested in seeing a good porn with great sex scenes, you'd be well advised to check this out as soon as possible. And in hindsight, a fake laugh track would have made the experience all the more entertaining.
Nope... not going to quote the song... not gonna do it...
Misty Stone In a really awful mock up of the original show's living room set, Hillary as play by Misty Stone finds Jazz on the couch and angry by his presence sits back complaining about the heat of the room. You see where this is going. Minutes after humdrum build-up, the two begin to shed their clothes from the heat, and Misty begins to take a liking to Jazz's come on, stripping and displaying her gorgeous ass and body for him prompting Jazz to lick and bite her butt making her moan. After Misty takes her top and panties off, Jazz has at her tits licking them and Misty mounts his face from above as he sits back eating her pussy out with her butt wiggling over his lips. She then comes down spreading out along the couch getting her pussy eaten out, and she reciprocates by gourging his cock and swallowing it whole. While the set up is kind of lame, the sex is pretty hot with Misty having some fun while also looks really good fucking and wiggling her ass every minute. After sucking him off and playing with his cock some more, she leans down over the couch to take it from behind by him sliding her ass up and down his large cock slowly, and screams as he pounds her from behind. He then plants her down along the couch and fucks her pussy with her legs spread, and pops it in to her ass again to pound her much to her shock as she cries out writhing wildly. He leans back to take a break as she bends down to swallow his cock, and mounts him cowgirl riding him fast and hard. Sucking on him some more, he dominates her from behind drilling her, and then rides him reverse cowgirl. After being fucked faw from behind she rides him again and gets a full facial. Of course they're caught by Mr. Banks who throws Jazz out in the trademark sitcom fashion sans the comedy.
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That wacky Will is still trying to get that hot coed and pulls it off meeting her at a cabin owned by her father. After trying his hardest to imitate Will Smith, the couple get down to business. After some goofy horse play, Will's booty call wrestles him down and ties him to the bed in a flashback to the episode where Will met Lisa (god, I have no life!) and after breaking free gets her down on the bed, stripping her clothes off one at a time. Imani Rose is yet another really sexy female performer here and she looks damn good taking it in and gets in to her segment convincingly. She takes her dress off spreading and fingering herself for him, and bends over to suck his cock off as she fingers herself moaning softly. She then slides back to take it up her ass from Will as he pounds her from behind dominating her as she cries out gripping the bed frantically. After some backdoor work on her he turns her to fuck her pussy wide as she screams and moans, and she sits up to suck his cock anxiously licking the shaft. She sets him down on the bed and rides his cock rapidly moaning and screaming, and Will mounts her from behind dominating her ass pounding rough and hard. He lays her back fucking her pussy with one leg high in the air, and she sucks him off some more, riding him reverse cowgirl, and takes it behind one more time before getting creamed along her butt cheeks. The psychotic Rose begins crying for some reason, and gets Will down and tied in his bed leaving him behind.
Sinnamon Love After even more absolutely dumb attempted comedy from director Dawayne cutting to a few porn stars laughing at his antics (they're being paid, folks), we finally get down to Uncle Phil and Aunt Viv. Don't worry aunt Viv is played by Sinnamon Love, a woman who is a definite highlight in an otherwise strong parody. There really isn't any reason why we should be watching these two characters fucking since it doesn't flow with the attempted story of the parody, but I just didn't give a crap once Sinammon came in to the picture. Uncle Phil makes quick work going down on Sinammon anxiously while she fingers herself, and now undressed sucks Phil's cock fast and hungrily. This leads in to a 69 where Phil gets a face full of her pussy and gorgeous ass, and she turns to ride him cowgirl at rapid fire pace with Phil grabbing her ass and pounding hard from below. She then bends over to get dominated by him with her ass high in the air, and after some more cowgirl, Phil works in on her ass solely, pounding her in to thebed and pumping her ass as fast as he can as she cries out taking it with grunts and loud screeches. After some heavy anal, he finally cums all over her ass.
Candice Nicole After more staging of reenactments from the show, Will wonders why everyone else is getting fucked but him. After some lame mocking of him, we meet Candice Nicole who plays Ashley in the middle of her classroom being hit on by a classmate. After her teacher has had enough from Ashley being chatty, he makes her stay behind class and Ashley gets in some extra credit sucking him off. After Carlton invites his own booty call, Ashley and her classmate stay behind to fuck a little as Ashley sucks him off and fully undresses. Going down on all fours, she sucks him long and hard as he chokes her with his cock making her gag, and they make their way to the desk mounting it as she rides him from the top pounding down on him hard and fast. Getting impaled by his cock, she struggles to ride without the head coming out the other end of her body. Taking another try for the royal impaling, she rides him reverse cowgirl and manages to ride him without hurting herself. He then slides her to her side pounding on her from behind as she cries and cringes, and gets it viciously from behind as she gathers herself crying out. The funny thing about this segment is Nicole seems to be in pain most of the time she's being jabbed with her classmate's cock, and it's uncomfortable, but arousing. Good show, babe.
Natasha Dulce Carlton finally works up the courage to talk a girl in the mysteriously small enclosed cafe with small windows and shades (weird for a public place), but Will has a little rendezvous in mind with a leopard dressed wearing beauty he picks up and goes home with. Without a doubt Natasha Dulce is my favorite of the female performers here as she is sexy, hot, and has an incredible figure along with some genuinely delicious breasts. After managing to persuade her in to his room, he makes quick work unclothing her revealing her amazing large breasts which he swallows whole, and they uncloth. Naturally, Will bends Natasha over the bed and uses her ass for assorted acts rubbing it, kissing it, and smacking it, and then gets blown by her. He then goes around and rams her from behind much to her delight, pounding her rapid fire. He spreads her wide along the bed and slams her pussy making her cry out, and then machine guns her pussy as she moans and groans. She then mounts him cowgirl and bounces on his cock anxiously, and rides him reverse cowgirl. After a quick blowjob, Will cums all over her tits with his big Willy.
Melrose Foxxx Finally we meet with Carlton who is at the couch apparently talking to himself when Will enters shooting zingers his way that wouldn't inspire a chuckle in a mental patient, and Carlton finally builds up the courage to invite the girl of his dreams over. She is Melrose Foxxx and she is about to get royally fucked. After some awkward back and forth with her, Carlton can't control himself and begins getting a hard on eventually cumming on himself. Leaving her alone to get changed, he arrives in a towel (That makes sense?), and enters with his cock sticking out. Foxxx obliges his second hard on by providing a wicked blowjob while fingering herself. She then bends over along the couch to get her pussy eaten out. After some tongue action he mounts her from behind and fucks her raw. He stands again to fuck her face with his cock, and she mounts him riding him cowgirl style fucking him hard. and rides him reverse cowgirl screeching and moaning loudly with every pump. Foxxx is yet another really hot performer of the group but she's yet another who also looks like she's in pain half of the time. Dawayne's dick is rather long and she grunts in pain every time he hits her pussy and it's quite telling when she enjoys the fucking and occasionally tries to ease up from the pain. After Cartlton finally spews on Foxxx, he gets in to bed with her and does the Carlton dance. It's weird... with Alfonso Ribeiro it's hysterical, with anyone else it's awful. Dawayne shows that to the audience while also rendering one handed audiences instantly flaccid.
Goodies: We're given a fifteen minute Behind the Scenes feature with the actors and performers having fun on the set, the director's practicing of the Carlton dance and some of the hot women of the flick goofing around. For a fifteen minute fixture it's a fun and cute look behind the scenes and I had fun with it, especially the good nature and humor of the porn actresses who seemed to have a blast when not being blasted on. There's a four minute pop shots reel, and a fucking great slideshow gallery of the female performers.
Audio/Visual: The thing about the Fresh Prince was that it was centered around the dialogue and one-liners so if you're going to parody a show that was goofy enough you have to be able to hear what the hell people are saying. Sometimes you could hear some of the performers attempts at deliverin dialogue and comedy, while other times the voices echo in the room leaving us with nothing but confusion and wondering when the action will start. Dawayne tries for a story and doesn't really accomplish it. The video is much better. While occasionally dark and gritty, the camera work is great and the definition if sharp in spite of the full screen transfer. I didn't have a hard time making out the hardcore sex, and found it quite engrossing at times.
After Thought: If you're going to do a parody of a sitcom, you should do it with a degree of wit and creativity and this parody doesn't bring much of it to the table. However if you're interested in some excellent fucking scenes with some insanely hot ebony goddesses with gorgeous rumps who really get in to their respective segments, I highly recommend this. I had a great time with it and it's a guaranteed boner factory for any open minded individual. And oddly enough because it's sort of associated with Will Smith it's currently grossing 440 billion dollars at the box-office. The man is a genius.