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ASSmazons


Studio: Score » Review by Dick Danger » Review Date: 1/4/11



XCritic's Advice: Skip It

Assmazons Volume 1

 

Starring: Sadie West, Ashli Orion, Sasha Heart and Kerry Louise

 

Overview:

 

Assmazons is presented by Porno Dan and Amy Brooke. The reason I ordered this movie is that I recently discovered Amy Brooke and from what I’ve seen she is VERY nasty. Each scene is hosted by Amy and a huge dork whom I presume is Porno Dan. The DVD case says that it was filmed in front of a live online audience.

 

Scene 1: Kerry Louise

 

Kerry is a huge-titted slut with a lot of ink. After lots of talking and goofing around we finally get down to some action. Amy and Kerry strip and show off their assholes. Dan and Amy use a vibe on Kerry’s clit, then Kerry uses it on Amy. A guy wearing a basketball jersey comes in and jams his dick right up Amy’s ass. He fucks her from behind for a while, then she gets on top for reverse cowgirl anal. She sucks his dick a little bit and she and Kerry just jerk him off for a while. Next she gets her pussy fucked cowgirl style and doggy style. Dan comes in and fucks Kerry from behind. He pulls out and shoots his load on her ass cheeks, which Amy licks up. Then Amy spreads her ass cheeks real wide, and the other dude cums all over her asshole. Kerry licks a bit of the jizz up. Kerry did no anal in this scene, and in fact barely got fucked at all. I’m not sure why she was even there.

 

Scene 2: Ashli Orion

 

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After the introductions the two girls strip. Amy uses a vibe on Ashli’s pussy. Then Amy bends over and fingers her ass while Ashli uses the vibe on her. Next Ashli fucks Amy’s asshole with a big toy. The two girls spread their legs next to each other and use vibes on their own clits. Dan fingers Ashli’s cunt. The girls are trying really hard to squirt but are having a lot of trouble. They sixty-nine and lick each other’s cunts and asses. Ashli shoves an inflatable toy up Amy’s rectum. Ashli gives Amy a good rimming and really jams the tip of her tongue up her sphincter. They share a string of anal beads and a double-headed dildo. Amy uses a vibe on herself again and finally squirts a bit. Dan comes back in and Amy takes his little dick up her ass cowgirl style. The girls take turns sucking him. Finally, he shoots his load into their mouths, and they swap it back and forth several times.

 

Scene 3: Sasha Heart

 

Amy introduces Sasha, who demonstrates how she can flex her glute muscles with perfect control. Amy puts her ass up in the air and Sasha rams it hard with a big toy. Next the girls go ass to ass and Dan puts a double-headed dildo up Amy’s ass and Sasha’s pussy. Amy uses a vibe and tries really hard to squirt on Sasha’s ass. You can tell she’s having trouble because they have to keep cutting the scene. They try to make Sasha squirt, and after much effort she finally squirts into a funnel that’s inserted into Amy’s ass. The ladies choose various other toys and fuck Amy’s ass some more. Amy makes Sasha wear a blindfold and a ball gag as she rides Dan cowgirl style. Amy takes her place and takes Dan’s cock up her asshole. Sasha even does some ass to mouth. Next the girls sixty-nine as Dan fucks Sasha from behind. Eventually he shoots a pretty big load all over Sasha’s butt cheeks, and Amy snorts it all up through a straw!!

 

Scene 4: Sadie West

 

Sadie is a cute, skinny brunette with long hair and a very tight looking ass. Her and Amy strip down and Dan fingers her. The girls use a vibe on each other. They use a bigger vibe on Sadie for a long time as Amy fingers her. The girls take turns sucking on Dan’s pencil dick. Amy gets on top and takes it up her ass in reverse cowgirl. Sadie sucks his cock clean and then Amy rides him some more. Sadie puts on a big strap-on dildo and pounds Amy’s asshole as she sucks Dan. Then Dan and Sadie actually DP Amy. Sadie lies on her back and gets fucked by Dan while Amy masturbates. Amy squirts all over the place. Dan moves over and fucks Amy’s ass doggy style. Next Sadie rides Dan as Amy licks his balls and her cunt. When Dan is ready to cum, he blasts a big load all over Sadie’s asshole, and once again Amy snorts it up with a straw.

 

Extras:

 

None, except for trailers for four other movies.

 

Final Analysis:

 

This is one of the worst movies I’ve seen in a long time. Everything about it is forced, unpleasant, uncomfortable, and unsexy. Porno Dan is such a dork that he distracts from the women. He can’t even be bothered to spit his gum out during any of the scenes. And who wants to see women get fucked by his skinny little dick? The sets and production look cheap and thrown together. The actors and actresses never stop talking during the entire movie. And I don’t mean dirty talk, I mean just chatting away like they’re at a coffee shop. But the worst offense of all is that none of the guest stars do anal! Why call the movie “Assmazons” if the only one taking it up the ass is Amy. I’ve seen how dirty she can be; she deserves much better than this slipshod effort from Immoral Productions. RUN, do not walk, as fast as you can away from this DVD.



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