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Big Naturals 21

Studio: Reality Kings » Review by Dean Isis » Review Date: 1/16/12

XCritic's Advice: Skip It

 Genre: Straight, big tits, all natural

Director: Unlisted

Cast: Sara Stone, Heaven Summer, Rachel Love, Haley Cummings, Bella Blaze, Jasmine, Miosoti, Chris Johnson, Jmac, Voodoo, Tony

Length: 04:02:07

Date of Production: Copyright 2011

Extras: Photo Gallery, trailers, a reminder that Reality Kings DVD has a website.

Condoms: No

Audio/Video Quality: 16:9 video, likely shot in high def. The footage is high quality certainly, though the sound is bad. Reality Kings has some insistence on avoiding edits and using the first take every time, which means there's a lot of background noise during the setup scenes. There's a tendency toward echo issues as well, and occasionally the color balance changes in the middle of a scene.

Overview: Reality Kings, the company that loves wasting everyone's time, presents Big Naturals 21, a "six" scene DVD full of real tits.

Scene 1: Haley Cummings is out...gardening? Well, she's terrible at it, anyway, but Chris shows up from inside the house, feels her up a bit as she's working, and heads back in the house while Haley finishes her work. I'm surprised to be saying it, but the dialogue is awfully condescending. I really hope it's not improvised and that Haley is playing a character, because she's certainly playing up the dumb blonde.

Blonde isn't entirely accurate, to be fair, Haley is wearing the two-tone blonde over black style that's apparently still popular, but just screams a need for attention.

-- sponsored by --

The scene is noisy, and not in a good way. Haley, for one, won't shut up. Her dialog is terrible, but more importantly, she's moaning and panting when nothing is happening, while she's blowing Chris, or while she's just laying down waiting. Adding to the auditory issues is the technical failure of the sound tech. The microphone is subject to terrible noise. Thumps with every step and the sound of air rushing against the mike with every repositioning of the camera. Can Reality Kings not afford a windscreen?

Whatever the case is, this is a weak scene. Maybe it's Haley, maybe it's the direction, but I've seen much better work from her and looks alone don't carry the scene.

Scene 2: Rachel Love and Voodoo are just in their house, it seems. They meet up in the bathroom after five minutes of Rachel talking to the camerawoman, there's some groping, some teasing, and finally some titfucking before the actual sex starts around 15 minutes into the scene. A little awkward wording aside, the pair have chemistry and Rachel sells it well. There is something a little odd about Rachel's declarations "You're gonna make me do it!", "what a big chunk of meat you have", and "oh fuck, honey!", but the sex itself is good.

Scene 3: Jasmine and Jmac are together in a gym that's suspiciously empty.

Reality! The dialogue doesn't help.



"Hey sweetie."

"Workin' out."

Somebody didn't pay much attention to the script. The next step in the scene is, of course, is to clap Jasmine's tits together and say "oh that's hot." No, it's just demeaning for everyone involved, as is the Shakeweight section that follows for the next ten minutes.

There's just nothing erotic about the setup, the high school antics, or Jasmine's makeup for that matter. The whole scene is just juvenile and underwhelming, but what else can we expect from Reality Kings? Jasmine can't bother to hide that it's just another day at work, one she'll wait for the end of.

Scene 4: Bella Blaze is asleep, and Jmac and his friend creep their way into her house, or his house, or someone's damn house anyway, it's not established. Someone starts feeling her up while she's sleeping and then they start going at her while she slowly starts to wake up. A ton of the 20 minute setup scene, naturally, is shot in night vision.

The scene moves into "hey, let's just film the porn shoot now that you're late for!" followed lying about whether or not the camera is on, and some admittedly decent fucking, though parts are shot at some terrible angles. Bella's great to look at, though the scene all feels a little forced. Probably because they've established it's just a porn shoot from the start, and Bella doesn't sound very excited.

At least around halfway through it starts to get okay, but it's just so damn creepy from the start.

Scene 5: Sara Stone and Heaven Summer are being followed by a creepy guy with a camera, which I'm fairly confident is the favored setup of any Reality Kings production. Their chosen characters are apparently "Big breasted airhead one" and "Big breasted airhead two", which they play well throughout the scene. They make out, they grope, they press their tits together, and then hit Voodoo with them while the new cameraman chuckles incessantly.

Sara actually says "Rail that pussy like a choo-choo train." She puts her tits over Heaven's face which muffles her and causes Voodoo to say "I'm tired of hearing her." For once, I agree. Then he says "Fuck her tits with your tits" and it all goes off the rails.

Heaven and Sarah are great to look at. Great tits, nice faces, but there's an active effort to make the scene as unappealing as possible as Voodoo rams his face into their chests and everyone reverts to junior high school levels of maturity.

God damn it.

Scene 6: Miosoti doesn't fuck anyone in this scene. She doesn't touch anyone, and there's barely any touching her. So what does happen? A half hour is spent measuring and weighing her tits, they have ice rubbed on them, Mio kneels over a glass table, and spends a few minutes in the shower. They also draw a Reality Kings logo on her boobs in chalk.

In other words, absolutely nothing remotely hot happens and Reality Kings puts more filler on a DVD.

Final Thoughts: Reality? No. Kings? No. Good porn? No. It's porn for frat boys. There are some great tits, and if that's enough for you, well then enjoy. If you expect more than bad camerawork, high school antics, and women without intelligence or personality, don't bother.

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