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Lesbian Nanny Tales

Studio: Girlfriends Films » Review by Evan Leaf » Review Date: 3/11/13

XCritic's Advice: Recommended

Genre: Lesbian, Feature

Cast: Scarlet Banks, Alyssa Branch, Asphyxia Noir, Layla Rose, Andy San Dimas, Staci Silverstone, Aiden Starr, Jodi Taylor.

Length: 173 minutes

Overview: The tagline tells us, “What happens with the nanny stays with the nanny.”  This is no sexed-up Mary Poppins, although it’s hard to figure out how the parody producers haven’t gotten around to it yet.  Lesbian Nanny Tales features four scenes connected by a theme of one of the women shirking her duties as a caretaker in favor of some female loving.  Lesbian Caretaker Tales wouldn’t have quite the taboo appeal.  There is no overarching story, but there are connections between the characters.  With LNT, Girlfriends Films launches a new title with the potential to inspire a few more editions before the novelty wears off. 

Most of the players are slight in stature, with small breasts.  There is a fair assortment of dirty blondes, brunettes, and a redhead.  Six of the eight women have prominent body art, as well. 

The title needs explaining.  Of course there are no children in the feature, but a little truth in advertising requires me to mention that the idea of the unassuming young woman who watches your kids having a salacious Sapphic side is not the main focus.  They’re all in-home aides of some sort, though.  And they all manage to get something going on with another woman.  Maybe the “nanny” approach is just trying too hard to create a niche within a niche.  Girlfriends Films already has the Lesbian Seductions series to explore the whole older/younger dynamic, and since you can’t get younger than 18 or older than 45 or so, how much is enough? 

Besides the issues with the conception of the film, the action was fantastic.  I was thoroughly pleased as LNT met all of my expectations of realistic lesbian sex, girls who are into each other and at least a nod given to decent production value.  Since there is a hint of a plot, it’s worth noting that the performers put forth effort to present the material responsibly, although some of the dialogue made me wonder if anyone actually took the time to sit down and write a script, or if they got to set and let the actresses ad-lib based on brief notes.


Scene 1: Alyssa Branch & Jodi Taylor. Alyssa Branch is petite, with long, dirty blonde hair, small boobs, a lip piercing, and a few small tattoos.  She has appeared in over 50 titles.  Jodi Taylor is newer to the industry, but an inspired performer, nonetheless.  Jodi is a taller, slim, freckled, redhead with a cute, short haircut and small boobs with great puffy nipples, as well. 

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Alyssa is a housekeeper showing the lay of the land to her replacement, Jodi.  The biggest surprise for Jodi is the visit of the neighbor, Mrs. Fields (Layla Rose), who comes over for some topless tanning.  Jodi and Alyssa are aroused by Layla’s teasing and retire to an upstairs bedroom for a friendly goodbye tryst.

Passionate kissing and petting lead to the I-eat-you-then-you-eat-me dance.  There is the traditional head-between-the-legs pussy eating and fingering, 69 action, and the scene ends with enthusiastic tribbing. 

The playful teasing and the lingering touches demonstrate real chemistry between the performers and bring about convincing orgasms.  They look like they’ve done other scenes together.  It should also be noted that both women in this scene have hair down there, not rain-forest bush, but not pre-teen bald, either.  I will certainly keep my eyes open for more scenes with Jodi Taylor.  This was my second favorite scene.


Scene 2: Layla Rose & Scarlet Banks.  Remember Mrs. Fields from the last scene?  Layla Rose is a petite Latina with magnificent, natural, D cup tits who is a veteran of nearly 50 titles.   Scarlet Banks is another Latina, who is newer to porn, having appeared in about a dozen films.  She has a slender figure with great legs, and for my money is the finest chick in the flick.   

To open, Mrs. Fields (Layla) is berating her husband for making advances at the nanny (Scarlet), and eventually kicks him out.  She then goes to, first, admonish, then console Scarlet, when she realizes her husband was solely to blame.  Layla comforts Scarlet after this regrettable situation, and just like in real life, they start making out and eventually retire to Layla’s bedroom for some serious gettin’ down.  

They start off kissing, as Layla rubs Scarlet’s muff.   Layla goes down, alternately licking and fingering her partner.  Then Scarlet goes to work on Layla, licking and fingering; Layla’s great rack is on brilliant display as she lays back on a pile of pillows.  Scarlet takes a second turn as the receiver and this time her partner applies a knee to the crotch for stimulation.   I have never seen this before! A knee to the pussy!  As Layla rubbed her knee on Scarlet’s clit, she also let the nanny know who was in charge with some light slaps to the face and light choking. The second scene ends with Layla rubbing Scarlet to an orgasm and the obligatory thank-you kisses.

A double-Latina lesbian pairing in a non-interracial themed feature is a rarity, to say the least.  A pairing in which both are beauties, with a set of great tits added for good measure, makes this scene a highlight for fans of elusive ethnic lesbian action.   This is the part of the movie that suffers the most from bad lighting.  The camera angles change more than necessary, probably trying to find an angle where a shadow doesn’t cut across Scarlet’s pretty ass or Layla’s tits.  Truth be told, the shadows are probably unavoidable, based on the architecture of the house used for filming.  With Layla on her back, receiving loving oral attention from Scarlet, this scene could have been so much better sans shadows.


Scene 3: Staci Silverstone & Aiden Starr.  Staci Silverstone is a young starlet who has managed to can about 20 scenes in about a year.  She is petite, with dirty blonde hair and small breasts.  Aiden Starr is a veteran of over 200 films in her 10+ years in front of the camera.  Her full C-cup tits belie her tiny frame. She also has long, dirty blond hair and a few small tattoos. 

There is no connection to either of the two previous scenes, except it seems like they’re all using the same house.  Staci is a wayward girl, drinking and smoking and partying to avoid the pain of losing her mother.  Aiden may be a housekeeper or friend of Staci’s late mother.  Whatever their connection, Staci is hungover and wants Aiden’s help.  Aiden is committed to getting her young charge on the right track, while Staci wants to indulge, and invites a friend (Asphysxia Noir) to bring fast food and liquor over.  Aiden catches them drinking, kicks Asphysxia out, and takes Staci into the bedroom for a talk and a spanking. 

Aiden delivers a surprisingly strong spanking, even leaving Staci’s bottom reddened.  The spanking becomes a hug, then a kiss, then Aiden pushes Staci back down on the bed to eat her out.  Aiden brings out the first toy in the film, a clit tickler that looks like an electric toothbrush.  After Staci cums, Aiden goes onto her back for Staci to eat her.  Staci has a prominent star tattoo on the small of her lower back.  Staci swings around so they are head-to-tail for a 69.  Then Staci is up on her knees for Aiden to plug her with a dildo from the back.  After Staci cums again, they kiss and cuddle and the scene ends.

The contrasting body types, Staci is thin and Aiden appears thicker all around, especially with the full C tits made for a visual treat.  For a young performer, Staci seemed to really enjoy the girl-girl action.   Both ladies really got into their roles and tried to bring life to the fantasy situations.  This is the scene with the rawest sexual energy.  Nannies always get what they want!


Scene 4: Asphyxia Noir & Andy San Dimas.  Asphyxia Noir is the slim chick with the goth look who has been taking the world by storm along with Skin Diamond.  She has jet black hair and tattoos all over. Andy San Dimas has been around for a while, notching her belt more than 200 times on screen.  Andy is a medium sized brunette with smallish boobs and a plethora of tattoos.


When Asphyxia isn’t delivering fast food and alcohol to Staci, she is a nanny.  In this scene, she is given strict instructions by her charge’s father, who then leaves this freaky chick to run around his house; bad idea.  In no time, Asphyxia calls her girlfriend Andy to come over and be with her. Andy seems to hesitate, so Asphyxia proceeds to masturbate in the bathroom and bedroom.  Little does she know, Andy has arrived to spy on her.  After Asphyxia cums herself to sleep, Andy creeps in and begins to molest her.

They retire to the bedroom for some spirited, kinky sex.  Asphyxia wastes no time diving into Andy’s love hole.  Then Andy returns the favor.  Andy turns over and gets some doggy-style fingering in her pussy and ass.  This is when the REAL spanking starts.  Maybe it’s Andy’s skin, but there was some serious redness going on on those cheeks which can be seen in full when they maneuver into a 69 with Andy on top.   After a couple muff diving rotations, highlighted by a face-sit by Asphyxia, they move into a trib to close things out.

Asphyxia Noir, don’t get me wrong, I love her work, but her acting is stilted.  She comes off with a  Vince Vaughn effect; she insn’t playing a character, she’s being herself.  I like tattoos so the extra eye candy here was appreciated, but I just couldn’t get too excited about this scene.

Final thoughts:

Besides the issues with the conception/theme of the film, the action was fantastic.  I was thoroughly pleased as LNT met all of my expectations of realistic lesbian sex, girls who are into each other, and at least, a nod given to decent production value.  All the action takes place in bed, not on a couch in front of a blank wall; couch porn is usually so insulting.  Since there is a hint of a plot, it’s worth noting that the performers put forth effort to present the material responsibly, although some of the dialogue made me wonder if anyone actually took the time to sit down and write a script, or if they got to set and let the actresses ad-lib based on brief notes.

All four of the pairings worked well visually. Scene 1 and scene 3 had the best chemistry between the performers.  This movie has a variety of looks and body types put together well.  Girl-girl fans who are anti-toy should go in knowing there is vibe and dildo play in 1 scene, the third with Aiden Starr & Staci Silverstone.  There is also some choking (very light) and spanking in three of the scenes.  I thought Scarlet Banks was the prettiest woman in the movie.  Jodi Taylor gave the best individual performance, in terms of both the sex and her acting, and she's so cute with that red hair and those freckles.  Scarlet's beauty and Layla’s great mammaries make scene 2 the one I will be reviewing the most.  This can be a good selection for hetero or lesbian couples, as well a good choice for the solo viewer.  I have to rate Lesbian Nanny Tales as a Recommended pick.  My estimation might have been higher were it not for the technical/video issues (shadows, editing tags), and the lack of any useful extras.


Date of Production: 4 Jan 2013

Director: ?

Condoms: No

Extras: Nothing more than brand marketing, not worth watching. Our Girlfriends is less than a minute of post-feature footage identifying the actresses in each scene. Promo’s begins with an anti-pirating PSA, and continues with a compilation of clips from other Girlfriends movies; the promo identified as Women Seeking Women is actually from the Road Queens line.  The Trailers section showcases 5 films: Creepers Family 1 looks like something I could take, or leave, and not miss much. Lesbian Bridal Stories 5, Lesbian Psychodramas 11, and Private Collection 1 are titles that will probably entertain, but might not surprise. To Protect and Serve 1 stokes interest in the joining of lesbian and cop fetishes.  Mother Daughter Exchange Club 25 is probably another installment of a repeat pleaser. No cumshot recap, no BTS footage, and no photo gallery.

It's XCritic, not XShill!!

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