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Hard Tails

Studio: Vivid » Review by Don Houston » Review Date: 3/6/03

XCritic's Advice: Skip It

Hard Tails


Genre: Feature, Comedy

Director: Robby D.

Cast: Bobbi Barrington, Marty Romano, Taylor St. Clair, Dale DaBone, Cherie, Cheyne Collins, Cheyenne Silver
Nonsex roles: Steven St. Croix, Anthony Crane, Frank Buckwyld

Length: 75 minutes

Date of Production: 5/21/01

Extra's: 5 unrelated bonus scenes, 3 photogalleries, blooper reel, positions room, double sided dvd cover, spam

Audio/Video Quality: The technical qualities here were similar to the ill fated Moxie, also put out by Vivid recently. The picture suffered from poor lighting, low quality dvd transfer, and a host of color problems. The audio was only kind of weak.

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Body of Review: Hard Tails is a feature from Vivid that had a really light tone to it and that helped make it funny from time to time. It detailed the chronicals of a female biker, played by Taylor, who is chased by bad bikers across, get this, Texas. That she kicked their asses was one of the funnier scenes in Vivid history even if it was more than a little cheesy (which matched the sets here). The sex was all oral, then straight with condoms if that matters. Here's the cast:

Scene One: Bobbi and Marty had a tame scene on the ground beside a cheap set. Her hair looked like a bad wig and that hurt the heat.

Scene Two: Taylor and Dale had a fairly warm scene on a couch. Not bad.

Scene Three: Cherie and Cheyne had a basic, no frills scene on a bed.

Scene Four: Taylor, still looking good, and Cheyne, still looking like a Star Trek Romulan, had sex on the ground. Fair with minimal heat.

Scene Five: Taylor, Cheyenne, and Dale had a warmish scene on a bed. Easily the best scene here.

Summary: I've seen Robby's work before and it rarely looked this weak so I'm wondering what happened to cause such problems. Vivid has been making a lot better looking movies lately too which causes me to wonder how this one got through quality control. In any case, the sex has been a lot better in other movies and the cast was okay but not at their best. There were some funny moments worth watching a few times (for the goof factor if nothing else) but I'd wait for this one to go on sale before spending a lot of money. Taylor and the others deserve better and so do us consumers.

You can email me with questions at Houstondon @ hotmail.com if you have any constructive criticism of the review too. :) Also you can follow me on twitter @HoustonDon

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