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Hollywood Spa

Studio: Wicked Pictures » Review by Staff Review » Review Date: 8/5/03

XCritic's Advice: Skip It

He said…
Let's see: Hollywood Spa is a Wicked Pictures production, so that's good. It features attractive actresses, another plus. A 5.1 Dolby Digital soundtrack can't be bad. And from the looks of the cover, there's an all-girl sex scene. I can't see anything wrong with that. For all intents and purposes, this should be a great DVD.

She said…
Upon first impression Hollywood Spa appears to be a high quality, high excitement DVD. The pictures on the cover certainly look thrilling enough. The sound and picture are clear and crisp. The stars and starlets are attractive. And the introductory text even encourages adults to practice safe sex through monogamy… how responsible of the producers! So, was I ready for some great porn when my man and I popped this sucker in? You betcha!

He said…
I never thought I'd say it, but the sex in Hollywood Spa is boring. I'm not entirely certain it would get me excited if I were stranded on a deserted island with nothing but a DVD player and a TV. And if I can't recommend this to a single guy, I definitely won't recommend it for couples.

Although each sex scene seems fun on the surface, something mars each one. For example, Jacklyn Lick and her companion both seem uninterested in every position they try on the couch. Lick actually looks upset, a look that doesn't lend itself to erotic thoughts.

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Perhaps the most disappointing scene features Serenity and three other females on the edge of the pool. Although it's a fairly tame scene, which might be good for couples interested in watching lesbian scenes for the first time, it just isn't fun enough to warrant much attention, even when the toys come out. At times it looks like several of the girls are at a loss for what to do next, and other times the camera loses site of the main action.

The only decent scene is the last one, which features Serenity and Asia Carrera. The two actually look like they're enjoying each other, but sadly, there isn't enough sensuality. It's definitely easy to tell they are performing for the camera instead of each other. It's a good sex scene, but with those two, it easily could've (and should've) been great.

She said…
Blah, blah, blah. That's the best description I can give the sex in this adult feature film. The sex scenes themselves cut in and out, without build up or transition between positions, which I always find irritating. (Adult films are always more fun when the actors pace themselves naturally, moving in and out of various positions, rather than seem to be following a director's orders.)

The cast is definitely good looking in this flick, with toned and tanned bodies that won't quit. But no one seemed to be enjoying themselves all that much. The sex scenes had a scripted feel to them; some were even totally drowned out by out-of-place techno music tracks. In particular, I found the "moans" of Ruby particularly annoying. Her screams sounded more like someone giving birth than a hottie enjoying the pleasures of a man.

Like I said, blah.

This is the only real quality you'll find on this DVD. Wicked Pictures presents Hollywood Spa in 4.3:1 aspect ratio that looks very solid. The detail is amazing, and there are no instances of mosquito noise or scratches. Halos do show up a bit during high contrast scenes and the color is a bit on the red side, but for the most part it's a solid transfer.

Same can be said about the audio. The 5.1 Dolby Digital track is impressive. You can really hear the music (unfortunately) and the moans. Unofortunately, the voices are a tad muffled at times, particularly during outside scenes. This is a production fault, however, not a transfer issue.

As if the film wasn't disappointing enough, the disc offers poor special features, too. For the most part you get Web links and photo galleries. Here's what you get: a bloopers reel that is short and not funny; star galleries that are nothing more that phots from the production; star stats that feature a scrolling list of measurements, film rolls, etc. for each female star; another photo gallery; eight trailers; and more Web addresses than you can shake a stick at. All in all, an overly tame set of extras.

He said…
Hollywood Spa is one of the most disappointing adult films I've seen. Despite having some great actresses and a scene with four girls, it just didn't live up to my expectations. The sex is boring, the music is jarring, and the storyline is too drawn out, which means the sex scenes are too far apart. The only thing going for this for couple viewing is that it is fairly tame and won't offend many viewers; it just won't turn on anyone either.

She said…
What a let down. From the outset, I was expecting Hollywood Spa to be an erotic DVD with lots of great, fun sex. Instead, what I got was a very dreary and boring DVD experience. I wouldn't recommend this adult film to couples. Despite its variety of characters and nice picture, it's dull, slow and, in my opinion, a complete waste of time.

Asia Carrera
Jill Kelly
Jacklyn Lick
Colt Steele
John Decker
Alex Sanders

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