XCritic Reviews

Bendable You Too

Fri, 24 Dec 2010 12:07:42 CST

Highly Recommended.

So, with all the sex toys on the market, how does one attempt to select just the right toy for just the right person, presumably using Santa's "naughty or nice" list as a guideline? Well, that's just it; everyone has a toy or twelve that would work well with their needs. Using reviews as a guide is okay but for something so personal as a device you are going to be shoving inside yourself, rubbing on various erotic body parts, or applying to another, there are limits unless you are the one writing the review. On that note as well, some of the otherwise "best" (most highly rated) toy reviewers tend to be the most opinionated about specific materials, companies, and aspects not directly related to a specific toy so your mile...Read the entire review

Evolved Silicon Bendable Rose

Fri, 24 Dec 2010 03:39:18 CST

Recommended.

One of the most appealing aspects about the Evolved Novelties line has long been their willingness to innovate, their multitude of product lines expanding all the time. I prefer this approach to the mere copying of others that some major toy manufacturers try, the latest company product a cute little vibrator called the Silicone Bendable Vibrating Rose. The one sent for review was red in color, made of the same popular material many of their toys are, the waterproof nature of the device certainly working as a plus for this reviewer.

The premise of this one is to simulate the single rose lovers give one another, the shaft of this toy being so flexible that a gal...Read the entire review

Evolved Seduction

Tue, 26 Oct 2010 01:30:11 CDT

Skip It.

If you've read any of my reviews for the Evolved Novelties lines, you'll know that I generally hold them to be pretty well built and almost always capable of getting people off, the rare exception noted or the occasional issue with pricing something a few of you don't care about. In that sense, the Evolved Waterproof Silicone Seduction from their Fleur De Lis lineup is one of their weaker toys in memory, the device looking and feeling good but lacking in the vibration department.

Read the entire review

Evolved Faith

Tue, 26 Oct 2010 01:23:48 CDT

Recommended.

Few people tie Breast Cancer Awareness Month with sex toys but perhaps that shouldn't be the case. After all, sexually healthy and active people are probably much more likely to use sex toys (at least in my experience) and as far as worthy causes are concerned, breast cancer impacts a lot of women so helping promote awareness is a decent thing to do. That said, Evolved Novelties recently released a small pocket vibrator called Faith, the device powered by a single AA battery.

...Read the entire review

Lucky 7

Wed, 06 Oct 2010 10:01:44 CDT

Recommended.

When it comes to sex toys, I'll be the first to admit that Nadine and I have had a lot of luck with the Evolved Novelties line. Since it started up a few years back, the company has evolved, no pun intended, into a much more receptive manufacturer, their initial selling point of those "cool boxes and low prices" to a mixture of higher end novelties designed & built in Europe out of phthalate free silicone even the locals there seem to appreciate. While not every toy in their many lines measures up to the best on the market, they are usually...Read the entire review

Evolved Waterproof Silicon Bliss

Thu, 02 Sep 2010 05:37:02 CDT

Highly Recommended.

Evolved Novelties has won several awards to date for their innovative sex toys, the company branching out of a couple of production companies quite willing to use said toys in their movies. My primary toy tester, Nadine, has appreciated the little touches the company puts in to make ladies like her happy, even her friends jumping on the company bandwagon when it came to recommending various items to their friends. One of the best selling points to start with is their packaging, the now-familiar metal boxes with latches a huge hit and tribal art design always in demand from friends that suggest I store such toys in almost anything else, as long as they can have the boxes...Read the entire review

Dream Maker Night Cap

Wed, 04 Aug 2010 05:54:42 CDT

Highly Recommended.

images courtesy of ADE

Having just written up some rather lengthy reviews such as the wonderfully sexy Just Jenna, I needed some stress relief at the hands of my bed buddy Nadine. My fluffy toy expert has no ties to production companies, doesn't feel the need to kiss ass to keep getting more stuff, and has disdain for those that strong-arm companies into kissing her ass lest she tear apart an otherwise solid toy. In that sense, she shares a lot in common with me, the only difference being my admittedly limited ties to a number of companies, directors, performers and others involved in the porn world, ...Read the entire review

Roulette - Bet on Black

Fri, 23 Jul 2010 09:13:18 CDT

Recommended.

High Roller

Evolved Novelties is one of my favorite toy companies these days, the majority of reviews for their products suggesting that are consistently improving their lineup and listening to consumers. While there are lots of much more expensive toys sharing similar traits, a lot of people are price conscious these days and appreciate that even though the company doesn't focus on the low end market, they are aware that price helps make a difference in sales. One of their newest lines is the "Roulette" selection made and assembled in Europe (the clear ...Read the entire review

Roulette - All on Red

Fri, 23 Jul 2010 09:12:23 CDT

Recommended.

High Roller

Fri, 23 Jul 2010 09:10:36 CDT

Recommended.

High Roller

Sugar - Short and Sweet

Fri, 25 Jun 2010 04:29:53 CDT

Recommended.

images courtesy of Evolved

So, having found one toy to be less than appealing, Nadine decided to try another, albeit also limited one, on for size. This time it was the Sugar from Evolved Novelties "Short & Sweet" series, the branch of the company dedicated to smaller toys with still-decent vibrations but not as much length or girth to speak of. I had my doubts going in on this round too because while she is no size queen, she definitely prefers a toy big enough to please her just as she likes strong vibrations. Thankfully, it seemed she found a winner in the neon pink jelly vibrator. For the life of me I could not tell the difference between this ...Read the entire review

Spice

Thu, 20 May 2010 10:01:14 CDT

Recommended.

images courtesy of ADE

So, having found one toy to be less than appealing, Nadine decided to try another, albeit also limited one, on for size. This time it was the Spice from Evolved Novelties "Short & Sweet" series, the branch of the company dedicated to smaller toys with still-decent vibrations but not as much length or girth to speak of. I had my doubts going in on this round too because while she is no size queen, she definitely prefers a toy big enough to please her just as she likes strong vibrations. Thankfully, it seemed she found a winner in the neon pink jelly vibrator.

Read the entire review

Straight Up

Thu, 20 May 2010 08:13:26 CDT

Skip It.

images courtesy of ADE

Okay, having reviewed lots of sex toys in the last ten years, I've seen an awful lot of decent toys and some that were best suited to let the dogs tear apart. While a certain clique of the toy reviewing community abhors discussing anything to do with price, I admit that I am not of that mindset, knowing full well that most consumers do not have unlimited funds and looking into pricing helps guide that old fashioned concept of "value". If this upsets a few people, so be it, but Nadine and I are not shills for toy companies any more than we are for the movie companies, you know, the kind that throw...Read the entire review

Heavenly Dolphin

Wed, 28 Apr 2010 04:56:46 CDT

Highly Recommended.

images courtesy of Evolved Novelties

Having just read the latest review by Xcritic reviewer "Crazy Slutty" and rubbing one out to her latest video in the forums, I decided it was time to finish up a toy review I was sitting on for the past week. Rather than take the approach of using something once for a couple of minutes and declaring myself an expert as I've seen on other review websites dedicated to toys, I wanted to spend additional time with cohort in crime, Nadine. My fluffy toy expert has no ties to production companies, doesn't feel the need to kiss ass to keep getting more stuff, and has disdain for those that strong-arm companies into kissing her ass le...Read the entire review

Silicone Roulette

Wed, 21 Apr 2010 04:31:45 CDT

Recommended.

images courtesy of Evolved Novelties

To some people, the term "sex toy" merely means the person they are bedding that night, the generic term bandied about so freely these days that it is important to hone in on what you mean. For others, the term means a device used to stimulate oneself or a partner to orgasm, some allowing us to delay the event, others prolonging it, and still others allowing for multiple orgasms. One of my favorite manufacturers of sex toys is Evolved Novelties, an offshoot of a popular...Read the entire review

Bendable Flame Purple

Wed, 21 Apr 2010 04:23:20 CDT

Highly Recommended.

images courtesy of Evolved Novelties

Having reviewed many sex toys from Evolved Novelties in the past, I can safely say that they tend to be big winners with my fluffy assistant Nadine (and other past assistants too). While lower quality companies make toys whose lives can be measured in days, weeks, or at best a few months, their products have rarely let us down, almost all of them still working. The latest toy sent to me from them was the Bendable Purple Flame, a three speed vibrator with graduated bumps that get thicker as you get down...Read the entire review

Evolved Waterproof Flutter - Slender Edition

Wed, 11 Nov 2009 11:28:36 CST

Recommended.

I have a love/hate relationship with Evolved toys. I own some that I love, but then I've had some where I went through 3 vibrators and they all short circuited within 2 minutes of use. When XCritic offered me a chance to review another Rabbit-Style vibrator from Evolved, I accepted because I had absolutely loved the Lunar Rabbit. I knew the Flutter didn't have as many bells and whistles as the Lunar Rabbit but it did have one thing that appealed to me- it is part of the slenders line. Now that isn't saying much in my opinion because it's still rather girthy, but I was hoping it'd make a great bath time vibrator.

It comes in the standard Evolved case- this one has a t...Read the entire review

Pristine - True Love Edition

Sun, 13 Sep 2009 04:02:26 CDT

Recommended.

Having written thousands of reviews over the years, including hundreds of toy reviews at that, I routinely get the message from readers that even when they disagree with my conclusions (gasp!), they appreciate that there are dedicated individuals trying to assist them in finding products suited to their personal needs. Reviewing movies is fairly easy in some ways because there are generally accepted standards in terms of lighting, technical values, and even performer skills (to a point) but sex toys are so personal in nature that it is often easier to just outline the details and let the consumer decide whether it might work for them. This weighed heavily on my mind when I reviewed the Evolved Novelties Pristine from their True Love collection, a device pink in color and decent in its ability to provide some g...Read the entire review

Dream Maker Waterproof Nocturnal Emissions

Mon, 20 Jul 2009 11:58:27 CDT

Highly Recommended.

While there are times when a smaller, less expensive vibrator is in order, there are also times when a larger, more powerfully equipped, and entertaining toy fits the bill. As a consumer advocate, I've found all sorts of shapes and sizes come into play when it came to sex toys, just as I've noticed there appears to be a market for every type of porn so what sets some toys apart from others? Well, in the case of the Dream Maker by Evolved Novelties in their Waterproof Nocturnal Emissions line, complexity is the name of the game as much as any other factor.

all pictures courtesy of Evolved Novelties ...Read the entire review

Waterproof Pure

Mon, 20 Jul 2009 11:08:45 CDT

Recommended.

Okay, so you're in the market for a vibrator that isn't made of flexible jelly material, don't want something so large that it would give Lexington Steele a run for his money, and aren't in the market for something costing an arm & a leg? Well, despite stating the obvious that quality toys are few and far between these days, to the point where the better ones are always out of stock and the need for sexual gratification such that you just pick something else, I think I found a device that people will like on several levels even if it doesn't strike me as the "best of the best" style toy you might be looking for. The name of the vibrator is the Waterproof Pure from Evolved Novelities Fleur De Lis line, a toy so new that it isn't even lis...Read the entire review

Waterproof Stunner

Mon, 20 Jul 2009 10:21:59 CDT

Skip It.

By now, many toy lovers have heard of the Evolved Novelties line, their price being on the low end and their cases exactly the kindof marketing tool that brick & mortar sellers find so helpful. While a few of my socially conscious friends complain about them beingmade in China (where a great many other companies employ the masses),even they seem silent when it comes to substantive complaints regardinghow these suckers feel when used properly. Let's face it, competitionin the sex toy business is pretty stiff (pun intended) and while my toytesting female friends all prefer a real life cock over a toysimulating one, when used judiciously they can enhance your sex lifeconsiderably better than the latest designer erection drugs.

Read the entire review

Waterproof Marvel - Slenders Edition

Mon, 20 Jul 2009 10:18:43 CDT

Highly Recommended.

By now, many toy lovers have heard of the Evolved Novelties line, their price being on the low end and their cases exactly the kind of marketing tool that brick & mortar sellers find so helpful. While a few of my socially conscious friends complain about them being made in China (where a great many other companies employ the masses), even they seem silent when it comes to substantive complaints regarding how these suckers feel when used properly. Let's face it, competition in the sex toy business is pretty stiff (pun intended) and while my toy testing female friends all prefer a real life cock over a toy simulating one, when used judiciously they can enhance your sex life considerably better than the latest designer erection drugs.

Today's reviews of their latest devices have all revealed ...Read the entire review

Waterproof Lust

Wed, 08 Jul 2009 13:07:53 CDT

Skip It.

Evolved is batting .500 with my wife and me. We previously tested the waterproof Serenity model, and had a very favorable response. Sadly, the same could not be said for the Lust model.

Sporting a similar tin case like the others from this company, the waterproof Lust vibe certainly looked like it would be as much fun as the Serenity - if not even more so. But looks can be deceiving, as we would soon find out. Upon opening up the vibe, we found that it was not flexible at all. Instead, it was made out of a rigid plastic that looked uncomfortable. But, being the trooper that she is, my wife still agreed to try it out with the hopes that she would be in for a surpri...Read the entire review

Waterproof Serenity - True Love Edition

Mon, 06 Jul 2009 16:49:14 CDT

Recommended.

Remember those days when adult toys came in boring, plastic holders, and you had to cover them in paper bags to avoid raising the ire of friends, family, and nosey neighbors? Well, Evolved has turned the vibrator into darn near a work of art - one that you almost want to parade around and show to everyone. If it weren't for those darn indecency laws.

But I digress. It is just that the thing is so pretty - with it's tin case with the flip-locks and clear window that frames the enclosed gadget oh so perfectly. It is almost a shame that it would soon be released and used in those unmentionable of places. Oh well .. toys are meant to be played with and this was no exception.Read the entire review

Waterproof Wonder - Slender

Sat, 18 Apr 2009 13:40:36 CDT

Skip It.

Like with the Lunar Rabbit, the Wonder vibrator from Evolved hadupdated casing. I prefer the casing a lot more because the hard plastictoy (it has the metal underneath) is much sturdier and seems as if itwould last a lot longer. I was pretty excited to try the Wonder as it'sone of the vibes from the Slenders line. A lot of the Evolved vibratorsI've tried have been on the girthier side. And while my partner is wellendowed, I don't care for very large vibrators.

The Wonder is a very cute vibrator. It's hot pink in color, I don'ttypically like pink- but for some reason hot pink is okay. At it'swidest point, the slender is only 4" in circumference. It's 8 1/4" intotal length with 6 1/2" ...Read the entire review