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Cheek Freaks

Studio: Pulse Pictures » Review by Don Houston » Review Date: 10/25/05

XCritic's Advice: Recommended

Cheek Freaks

Pulse Pictures

Genre: Vignette

Director: Bryan Xin

Cast: Flower Tucci, Van Damage, Sydnee Capri, Christian XXX, Mia Bangg, Sascha, Goldie Coxxx, Sledge Hammer, Courtney Cummz, Kurt Lockwood, Kami Andrews, Joel Lawrence

Length: 163 minutes

Dates of Production: 5/16/2005, 5/18/2005, 5/20/2005, 5/28/2005, 6/1/2005

Extra's: The best extra was easily the bonus scene lasting 27.5 minutes long starring Kami Andrews, Joel Lawrence, and Sledge Hammer. I described it below but it was a solid extra for fans of hardcore action. There was also a moderately long photogallery with pictures from the movie set to some droning music. Do yourselves a favor and turn off the sound during it to play something, anything, else. For me, the best extra in this two disc set was the 19 minute long Behind the Scenes extra shot by Sun (it was her voice at least). Starting out with famed reviewer Roger (one of the nicest guys in porn) interviewing him (wearing a "Kobe is Evil" T-shirt), Bryan Xin came off as kind of ill at ease for the camera (though Roger wasn't exactly in great form either). I applaud the marketing savvy of trying to co-opt a reviewer this way since it all but guarantees a good review but I feel obligated to mention that more effort on the movie would achieve the same effect (and not alienate customers). Otherwise, once the initial interview was over, the sex footage kicked in and eventually ended with Kami pissing in a public parking lot as discussed earlier. The cover was done in comic book style with two sides but I worried about the clear plastic case since the kind used breaks very easily in my experience.

Condoms: None

Audio/Video Quality: Cheek Freaks was presented in the usual 1.33:1 ratio full frame color as originally shot by director Bryan Xin for distribution by Pulse Pictures. This being the first release by the company, I was hoping to see if Bryan improved the technical aspects of his movies over what he used to do for DVSX. Sadly, the lighting was off and there was a whole lot of grain present. The colors were over saturated and the background lighting of most scenes, due in large part to the natural light coming in from the windows, washed out portions of the scenes too. The composition of the shots was almost always well done, enhancing the look of the gals but the technical parts of the picture were weaker than average except for this. The 2.0 Dolby Digital stereo was in English, the industry standard, but had some issues too. The vocals were hollow and seemed to be recorded improperly with the microphone unable to handle the large jumps in levels all too often. With relatively little effort, both aspects needing work can be addressed for later movies but that's as constructive as I can be about it.

-- sponsored by --

Body of Review: Bryan Xin has long been associated with directing for DVSX. I once interviewed him (in 2004) and he had a lot of ideas that weren't used so perhaps that was what led him to set out on his own to start up Pulse Pictures. The company's first release is Cheek Freaks, a show focused on anal sex and tease footage of wonderfully pleasing asses brought forth for your viewing pleasure. Bryan has long had the eye for offering up good scenes but his technical expertise has held him back. In the world of porn where you can be a warehouse worker one day and a director the next, there really doesn't seem to be a need for established credentials but whoever gave Bryan his first gig probably saw he was gifted and only in need of polishing up. He's still on the road to discovery in terms of offering up what may well become a solid series some day so here's a brief look at the movie, noting that no condoms were used by the performers as they engaged in risky sexual behavior:

Scene One: Flower Tucci, the cutie featured on the front DVD cover, was up first as she bent over and otherwise teased the camera with her wonderfully ample sample in what looked like a solarium of windows with a big couch. There aren't many gals with an ass this big that aren't fat so this footage was nice to watch over and over (and over) again. After masturbating with a pink liquid filled dildo, she finally hooked up with her partner; Van Damage. The two made a nice pair with each spending some time warming the other up. Her oral wasn't anything special, nor were his antics opening her up with a glass anal plug, but as part of the larger whole, it worked well with the dirty talk she gave the audience. The technical DP gave way to her riding him in her ass, calling for more as he spanked her a few times. He eventually rubbed out his load into her awaiting mouth, making the scene well worth the cover credit.

Scene Two: Sydnee Capri, a meaty black gal with powerful legs and a large, firm ass, was up next as she climbed the staircase inside as part of her tease footage. After watching over a half hour of Flower at work, I needed a break so I was pleased to return to this scene. The action was very similar this time, with Christian XXX as the meat puppet and her working her panties into the folds of her crotch more effectively than Flower did. Toys were used to open her up and he was used to drive her home (again, the glass dildo initially used was interesting to say the least). She was also verbally gifted and her playfulness was a large part of why I liked her at work with her attitude second to none as she took the load from him. If you like gals built for comfort more than speed, you'll like her a lot.

Scene Three: Mia Bangg, a bleached blonde with a big ass and otherwise lean body, is generally not in my top ten list for porn performers due to the way she always seems ill at ease in her scenes. I've seen her hit the mark a couple of times in recent months so that makes it all the more frustrating when she's having an off day on camera. Essentially, if ever there was a gal with lots of potential in need of an extended stay in a porn finishing school; she'd be it. Her tease seemed mechanical so I feared the worst of her performance but she actually surprised me once the oral was over by giving it up like a champion. Sascha was on the receiving end of her mouth, pussy, and ass; showing no problems with her rougher edges, even as she slobbered all over his rod. She let him do most of the work but at times, she really kicked into overdrive to show the goods, although it was too rare if you ask me. The mouth of semen seemed at home with her but swallowing seemed beyond her level of skill; making me appreciate the others a bit more than I might otherwise have done.

Scene Four: Goldie Coxxx, a blonde with a much leaner body than the previous gals but still owning a pleasingly tight ass, was up next as she followed the formula. She reminded me largely of a stripper type you'd find in any club across the country, with just enough looks to get a fair share of dances from customers. She went with Xin's formula and used the glass dildo on herself before the real action with partner Sledge Hammer kicked in. The contrast between the two was a nice change of pace considering their skills seemed markedly in contrast to the other gals. In short, the gal is to oral what most of them are to anal; though she gave up the ass well enough too. In the end, she was kind of lifeless as he jerked off to her face but she had a lot of good moments earlier.

Scene Five: Courtney Cummz, a very attractive gal that has also been blessed with a firm ass and otherwise nice features, was up last in this display of prominent backsides as she followed the general formula in her white shirt, plaid skirt, and blue satin panties. Her motto on the shirt was D & G ("drink and gamble) so you know she's a fun gal to play with. Partner Kurt Lockwood found this out firsthand as he gained some extra attention from her as she tossed his salad (rimmed him) and fingered his ass (Kurt has long liked anal play going both ways from what I hear; and is man enough to admit it). The playfulness factor of the scene was therefore better than most of the other scenes, not because they deviated from the formula (they didn't) but due to the way they seemed to want to play together. She was a good ride in all three holes and while her ass wasn't the best of the batch, how she used it was equal to any of the others present. He rubbed out a large load on her face at the end and she seemed to love every last drop of it like no other present. Whew!

Bonus Scene: Kami Andrews, a gal known more for her sexual performances than her stunning good looks, was on the second disc in a bonus scene that didn't quite cut it in terms of getting onto the main movie itself. She teased outside by the pool on a cloudy day, wearing a stripper outfit, though not for long. Her partners were Joel Lawrence and Sledge Hammer, both of whom took her on once she went inside and followed the formula. The dildo action was solid, the tease nice enough and the biggest weakness of the scene was how someone messed up the audio (the reverb nearly broke my speakers a few times). The sex included DP's and swallowing with the scene lasting 27.5 minutes long and having more replay value then most of the movie.

Summary: Cheek Freaks was a movie that I had a difficult time classifying though I settled on a rating of Recommended. The technical aspects of the movie were below par but the casting, the formula used for the gals, and the general heat of the scenes was enough to compensate (in large part due to the interesting extras offered up on the second disc). I wished Bryan has used the comic book theme in the scenes as well as his artist pal did on the front DVD cover but maybe future offerings will try something along those lines; even as a goof it could provide fans something different. I'm sure Bryan loves ass as much as the next guy given his approach here but in fairness to the rest of the producers out there, they offer much the same material, with much the same casting, so carving out a niche to call your own may prove the difference between sinking and swimming in an already crowded field. There is certainly a big enough market to make it but with anal greats like Jules Jordan, John Stagliano, and several dozen others that have proven themselves time and again, he'll need to fix the audio and visual components of his movies if he hopes to compete.

You can email me with questions at Houstondon @ hotmail.com if you have any constructive criticism of the review too. :) Also you can follow me on twitter @HoustonDon

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