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My Secret Lesbian Crush


Studio: Pulse Distribution » Review by Jay Taylor » Review Date: 2/9/18


XCritic's Advice: Skip It

Genre: Lesbian, Euro

Director: NA

Cast: Tracy, Jasmine, Angel, Vanessa, Eileen, Nessy, Tess, Angela, Erica, Vanessa

Length: 1:53

Date of Production: 2017

Extras: There’s a chapter selection, slideshows of each of the scenes, trailers for three other releases, and box covers for three other films. 

Condoms: NA

Audio/Video Quality: The quality is okay, with some scenes being better than others. Subtitles are added when the girls speak. 

Overview:

This is just some squeaky clean European lesbian sex. Pretty girls kissing, fingering, and softly licking each other's pussies. That's it, because that's all you need.  

Scene One:

1

Tess and Angela are surfing online for vacation spots. Tess reaches under the pillow and finds a hitachi that Angela’s been using on her back because she’s been sore. Tess doesn’t believe her… and so shows her how a magic wand is SUPPOSED to be used, starting over her panties. I’m really into this sort of “first time” scenario that Euro studios are so good at, and since I personally masturbate with a hitachi I can definitely relate and just hearing the sound gives me a Pavlovian response. Soon the girls are kissing. Angela removes Tess’ panties and kisses and strokes her while she masturbates. They remain almost completely dressed until Tess climaxes, and then quickly remove their clothing. Tess works her way down Angela’s body and we’re treated to some gorgeous close ups of her mouth in various locations. These closeups are why when I’m after girl/girl porn I actively search out European studios because US content just doesn’t seem to be shot in the same style. Also, their lesbian sex seems to be a lot more gentle and sweet than with American girls, which I appreciate. Some of us tend to be more porny and showy. Tess licks on Angela a bit then removes her panties and fingers her before dipping back down. They get in a spoon position so Angela can be fingered, and in the close up it looks like they could have really used some lube; but they figure it out. Tess plays with her for a long time until her moans get just a bit more urgent, and then they finish with a kiss.

Scene Two:

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2

Lady and Lucy are two lovely blondes wearing lace in bed. No dialogue in this one, just straight to kissing. It gets more aggressive and Lady is the first to take her top off and get her nipples licked by Lucy. She pulls off Lucy’s shirt, she has a pretty little bra underneath. She finishes undressing her and then slides down to lick her pussy. She fingers her as they continue kissing. Lucy cums, then they switch positions. She removes Lady’s panties and starts by rubbing her clit before putting her mouth on it. Lady is pretty reactive, giving encouragement and asking for eye contact. She finishes, and the girl’s kiss. This scene was very much just gonzo girl girl. I would’ve really appreciated the tiniest bit of story to tell me who they are and why they’re fucking.     

Scene Three:

3

Eileen and Nessy are in bed and very quickly start kissing. It’s slow and soft with lots of tongue.  The girls pull off their sweaters and Eileen is the first one to start making her way down the other’s body. She doesn’t get too far though before Nessy pulls off her panties and starts licking her from behind. She flips over into a more comfortabe position, and Nessy resumes eating her out. She adds a couple fingers and then they switch places so she can get penetrated. That’s it. This scene seemed super short, but really was just what it was… pretty girls having gentle sex. 

Scene Four:

4

Tracy and Jasmine have an arrangement… Jasmine likes her pussy licked, and Tracy likes to lick it. That’s it. Totally no mutual attraction here. Okay, that's cool. The girls start to kiss, with Jasmine definitely being more passive, but receptive. At least, until she asks Tracy to take her shirt off so she can suck her juicy tits? That seems out of the pillow princess narrative, but anyway… The girls finish undressing and Tracy works on Jasmine’s nipples a bit before pulling her panties to the side and sucking her pussy. There’s lots of stunning close ups of her tongue on her pretty pink. She bends Jasmine over and pulls her panties off before fingering her and licking her ass. Then they kiss and Jasmine works her way down Tracy’s body, removes her panties, and licks her pussy. Sigh. Like, okay, it’s gonzo porn and "the story doesn’t matter", but they could have gone in multiple directions to make this plot make sense, or just not even had storyline at all. Tracy cums, and then goes down on Jasmine again. They sixty-nine, and finish with a kiss. This would’ve been a great scene except for the wack storyline. It was a little botched, and made it exceedingly difficult to focus on the sex, for me at least.  

Scene Five:

5

Erica and Vanessa are a blonde and brunette who both have braids. I’m a fan of this because I know how annoying it is to do a sex scene with long hair, and also because I think girls having their hair back is a very natural and sexy look that isn’t utilized enough by the porn industry. They kiss and undress each other; there’s no dialogue but their body language plays up the “we’ve never done this before” narrative. Vanessa licks Erica through her panties for a minute then removes them to get a taste of the real thing. It’s very sweet and soft and she has an orgasm and is played with a bit before she sits up just to sit back down on Vanessa’s face.  They kiss a bit, then Erica works her way down to Vanessa’s box. 

Final Thoughts: 

This movie was exactly what it claimed to be… pretty Euro girls having soft easy to watch girl girl sex. This was the sort of porn I was really into when I first started masturbating to porn because of the really pretty close ups and I guess after a few years of doing hardcore pornography I’ve moved on to much more deviant things. There’s nothing wrong with what this is, it’s just a bit soft for my taste. I could label it “female friendly”, but what does that it even mean? It’s good starter porn, how’s that? Innocent. Sweet. I’d say… unless you’re dipping your toe into porn or really know that this is the type of movie you want, skip it. I feel bad that saying that cause it's fine for what it is, though. I’m sorry. :(



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