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Greatest Asswhores Ever!, The

  • Release date:
    July 25, 2006
  • Cast:
    Tiffany Mynx|Katja Kassin
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The Greatest Asswhores Ever!

Elegant Angel

Genre: Compilation, Anal

Director: varied by scene

Cast: Tiffany Mynx, Tera Heart, Peter North, Katja Kassin, Mick Blue, Erika Bella, Mark Davis, Aleksandra Nice, Jake Steed, Vince Vouyer, Olivia Del Rio, Valentino, Tianna, Frank Gunn, George Saber, Belladonna, Anastasia Christ, Toni Ribas, Nacho Vidal, Olivia O'Lovely, Tony T.

Non-sex role by Frank Thring

Length: 201 minutes

Date of Production: 6/25/2006 (the compilation only; box); 7/1/2006 (compilation only; credits)

Extras: Due to the nature of the compilation using up most of the space on the disc, the only extras were some trailers to more contemporary releases from Elegant Angel (and some spamming phone sex commercials).

Condoms: None

Audio/Video Quality: The Greatest Asswhores Ever! was presented in the same 1.33:1 ratio full frame color that the scenes were shot in over the years (from 1993 to 2004) by a slew of directors for release by Elegant Angel. Some of the older scenes were full of grain and all kinds of problems with their pictures but to be fair, it rarely got in the way of the heat from the performances. The newer scenes looked better with only minor quirks that some of you may not appreciate although I'll be the first to admit that I prefer flat lighting and camera work that reduces the need for edits. The composition of the shots in many cases enhanced the looks of the ladies as well as increased the heat of their performances, with some directors doing a decidedly better job of it in their respective scenes. The DVD did not appear to have any mastering problems and I can fairly state that it provided a host of appealing visuals for you to get off with. The audio was presented in a 2.0 Dolby Digital English with all of the vocals appearing to be recorded in monaural. The music in some scenes was a pain in the ears in terms of generic pieces played but once the sex started, they generally didn't detract from the scenes nearly as much as some of the stuff being released lately.

Body of Review: Elegant Angel has long been a company to embrace what the fans want and offer up a venue for promising directors to provide this kind of action when other companies scoffed. As a result, Patrick Collins has been able to maintain a loyal following of fans that appreciate his devotion to their desires and while his titles haven't always been the most technically astonishing available; the stroke value they show typically beat releases by even the biggest of his competitors back in the company's heyday. Today's review is on a compilation of anal scenes from the company vault called The Greatest Asswhores Ever! and to be right up front with you, if you haven't seen most of these scenes, you might want to go out and buy this one right now. While anal sex is common these days, it wasn't when many of these scenes were shot and even the newest offerings on the DVD show a tremendous amount of replay value. Of the many new gals that call themselves anal queens, few can favorably compare to most of the ladies presented here so here's a quick look at the scenes by cast and action, noting that all the ladies did anal and no condoms were used:

Scene One: Cumback Pussy 9: 1997: Tiffany Mynx, has long been one of the best anal performers in porn and this nearly ten year old scene showed why her body of work still stands the test of time along with curvy Tera Heart, the maestro of pop shots; Peter North. The initial droning music during the tease aside, the footage of the lovely ladies invoked some major boner action and it always amazes me how much longevity Tiffany seems to have (to be frank, I have appreciated her work for years and think she still holds up against the newest ladies in porn; contrary to what the industry tells us). In any case, the camera moved around a lot but the gals seemed to appreciate sucking his meaty member and both took his cock deep inside their pussy and ass. The energy was undeniable and while the technical matters weren't as crystal clear as newly made titles from the company, the chemistry and passion were fine indeed, making it clear why this was the first scene in the compilation. Tiffany took the facial as Tera licked his balls, marking the scene's close but the replay value was very nice.

Scene Two: Big Wet Asses 1: 10/2003: "Katja Kassin, perhaps the hottest ass to leave Germany since WWII, followed the formula and teased the camera with her red vinyl skirt, black vinyl gloves and fishnet stockings. Oil on her ass is almost overkill since she's so perfect to begin with. Mick Blue was in Heaven with this gal (I can't blame him) and the oral was great. They moved onto vaginal sex with her earthy moans causing me some discomfort in my own pants before they went onto anal sex. She did the anal and ATM better than any of the others and he christened her further with a large dildo. The scene ended after he shot his load in this very hot scene." I still think this scene stands the test of replayability and passion, years later, as one of Katja's best works.

Scene Three: Sodomania 23: 1998: Erika Bella, a busty brunette with some awesome curves and a beautiful face, was up next with Mark Davis on a white leather couch after producer Frank Thring (in a cameo only) tried to rape her. She found Mark infinitely more attractive and didn't spurn his advances as he slowly warmed her up to the twangy music. Her black lingerie enhanced her look a lot but her sexual skills were what rules the day as she slobbed his knob with great care. He returned the oral favor and then started slowly boning her as she gyrated her hips in pleasure. The active ride continued until the anal started and while she was decidedly one of the least active anal vixens of the show, she did come across as enjoying it as Mark took her in missionary style. It concluded with the mouth pop and the slightest sinister twist but I thought it was an okay scene nonetheless.

Scene Four: Bunghole Harlots 2: 1998: Aleksandra Nice, a lean redhead with the European look that later came into fashion, played a foreign exchange student who never said no to Jake Steed or Vince Vouyer in bed. There was some minor tease going on before Vince had her give Jake a demonstration of her oral skills; with her lovingly attacking his rod as though it were her favorite thing to do. Jake took the opportunity of her ass in the air to start banging her pussy in doggy style but both men got to ride her holes after the oral was over. For the most part, she was another one that let the guys do most of the work although her DP struck me as showing her wiggle as effectively as any of the others in the cast and fans of facials will love that they coated her face so thoroughly.

Scene Five: Flesh Circus: 2003: Olivia Del Rio, a curvy anal performer playing an animal trainer in a circus, was up next as Valentino, dressed as a monkey boy with more hair than Ron Jeremy and Steve French put together, broke free of his cage and ravaged her. Directed by Thomas Zupko, you can imagine the kind of weirdness shown but the humor of the scene was displaced by the way she seemed so into doing him (and her lengthy black fetish dress sure looked interesting). Her blowjob was good and thankfully, her salad tossing was kept to an obscure camera angle most of the time but she proved to be a wild one throughout the scene. Her power strokes as she aggressively rode his cock managed to liven up the scene too, with her not missing a beat when it came time for the anal action you're looking for. It ended with some ATM and a massive pop shot to her face, marking it as the strangest scene of the bunch but well worth watching a number of times unless you have a thing about guys in Sasquatch suits.

Scene Six: Buttwoman Back in Budapest: 1993: Tianna, stroking her well formed ass, was up next as she warmed up for Frank Gunn (called Ferry Gizen in the ending credits) and George Saber. I'll admit that in the facial looks department, she was never one I'd have spent the money for a drink on yet her sexual skills were almost always admirable to me. The guys beat off during the tease and George was where she went first to suck with Frank (sporting long hair like Alex Sanders) came up behind her to rim her soundly). She went to Frank's cock after that and George screwed her pussy, but as roughly acted as the scene was, it was the technical values like grain that weakened it the most. The anal was reminiscent of scenes from back then in that it didn't last all that long and she seemed more natural about doing it though it had less replay value than average for me.

Scene Seven: Buttwoman iz Bella: 2000: Belladonna, truly one of the leading anal queens over the years when she was doing men (she's back to doing them now I'm told), was up next in a scene where her car broke down in Europe and she sought help at a nearby house. Cutie Anastasia Christ, dressed in some sexy lingerie, answered the door and said she'd help out with the scene cutting away to Toni Ribas and Nacho Vidal complaining about women near the town square. The scene cut back and after Anastasia called someone to assist with the car, Bella took advantage of the opportunity to film the hotty in bed with some great tease footage as a result. The guys walked in on them and the resulting scene was definitely one of the ones that escalated Bella into the porn consciousness as an anal queen (remember that this was made back when she was still relatively new in porn). Bella had some incredible chemistry with Nacho and while the scene could have been shot better, the fact remains that in terms of heated action, it was among the best in her career and high up there in terms of Elegant's vaults. Whew!

Scene Eight: Big Wet Asses 3: 2004: Olivia O'Lovely, a busty Latina built for comfort over speed, was up next as she showed her fleshy ass off in tight black shorts, matching fishnets, and a see through top with oil covering her whole body in some of the finest tease footage of the compilation. Her nasty attitude shone through the entire time and she proved to be a match for Tony T., who played a goofy scientist attempting to create a "race of super asses to take over the world". Okay, if he had created Olivia's ass, I'd have to give him props for succeeding in his endeavor but the true kudos go to her parents. He savored the taste of her ass and she was into the action as he did so but even more when she was slobbing his knob. This gave way to the penetration portions of the scene where she showed why I've developed a great fondness for her over the years; actively and aggressively riding his cock as he hammered away at her. The way her ass cheeks rippled during the ride was incredible and fans of phat ass anal queens will watch this and limp away with stains in their shorts. I really liked the emphasis on keeping her oiled up too with the facial showing her to enjoy the taste of ejaculate. Sweet!

Summary: The Greatest Asswhores Ever! was not a perfect selection of anal scenes from the company vaults (Tiffany would be getting more coverage if that were the case, as would Katja) but the level of fuck for the buck, the superior nature of the performances in most cases, and the stroke value combined with replayability all made me consider this one worthy of a Highly Recommended. The flaws of the movie were minor and all projection aside, Patrick Collins should get a lot of credit for this one given his squeal of approval on the compilation. In short, The Greatest Asswhores Ever! served up as a very hot selection of anal goddesses from porn's past and present, marking it as one of the best compilations I've seen this year (and the listed credits on the scenes were very helpful; a trend I hope the company continues and expands to listing on the cover or advertising in the future). Good job!


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